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Member
Member Since May 2017
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 98
6 11 hugs
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#1
Hi everyone.
I recently begun a medical program, and needless to say...It isn't what I thought it would be. I hate it. I can't stand it and cannot see myself doing this for my entire life. I have aced everything so far and have done well, I have one year left in this program and I just do not like it at all. My parents are pissed off I want to quit, I have made some friends along the way, and I would feel like a failure if I quit. I feel as though everyone will look down on me. My parents were not thrilled with how I want to quit. They lashed out on me and act like I did this on purpose. I don't know. I want the courage to withdraw myself, but I feel as though my program director and classmates will look down on me. I feel as though I will lose most of my support group, and even some family members who hope I will fail will be proud to see me withdraw. Something I have realized also is that I just don't have the same interests as most people and it bothers me. I do find it difficult to get involved in extracurriculars, or doing things, but most of what I do is work and study and nothing else. I see everyone else (my classmates) have some sort of life, but I don't have any and it is my fault. |
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![]() Bill3, MickeyCheeky
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![]() Bill3, MickeyCheeky, Skeezyks
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Legendary
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Italy
Posts: 11,817
(SuperPoster!)
7 38.4k hugs
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#2
You have to do what you want to do, NeedHelp104. That's your priority. And I think your parents and your family need to accept and understand that. This is your own life, after all, and you have every right to make your own decision. What would you like to do instead of this? Perhaps you just need to focus on yourself for a short while and understand what you want to do. Please don't give up. I know finding a career is hard. But I'm sure you'll find one. You can do this! You're strong, I know that. I believe in you. Remember that we're here for you. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you
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![]() NeedHelp104, Skeezyks
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![]() NeedHelp104
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Disreputable Old Troll
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
Posts: 32,762
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#3
You mentioned you recently started this program & you have a year left. You didn't mention how recently "recently" is. You also didn't mention what type of school it is you're attending or whether or not you can get some or all of your money back. So there are some unknowns here from my perspective.
![]() In general, I would like to suggest that quitting may not be the best option. How all of these people you mentioned feel about you quitting isn't really relevant, to my mind. The fact you hate what you're studying certainly is though & it's something you need to deal with. (You do also need to consider how you'll feel about yourself afterward if you quit.) Quitting in general can become a habit. And not one that will serve you well as time goes by. So, to me, simply quitting should be your option of last resort. ![]() One preferable option to just quitting would include transferring to another program either within the same school or another school if possible. Another idea would be to talk with your instructors or academic advisor about your situation & see if they can suggest some alternative programs or perhaps other types of jobs you might be able to get (other than what you're training for) if you go ahead & finish your program. Many types of training & skills can be transferrable to other kinds of employment beyond what you've actually studied. And there are probably other possibilities I haven't mentioned. ![]() The important thing here, to my way of thinking, is to not simply quit the program you are in but rather to have a way forward mapped out before you leave the program you're in, if indeed that is what you decide to do. Simply quitting & then trying to figure out what to do next is, to me, the least desirable way to proceed & the one to be avoided as much as possible. Good luck with making your decision though whatever it is. ![]() __________________ "I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
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![]() Bill3, healingme4me, mrsselig
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Member
Member Since May 2017
Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 98
6 11 hugs
given |
#4
Quote:
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Legendary
Member Since Mar 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 10,924
15 24.1k hugs
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#5
Hating a new program in the first month is not unusual. I did that.
I’m really sorry that your parents lashed out at you. That was tremendously unhelpful. And you have family members who actually want you to fail! ![]() I think Skeezyks has a lot of wise thoughts. My advice is to speak to the program director, express your concerns to them, and (if okay) let us know what they have to say. ![]() |
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![]() mrsselig
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,376
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#6
Talk to advisor or professors and ask for suggestions. They might have good ideas on how to proceed. Dont quit until serious discussion with whoever is in charge. My daughter switched her undergrad program after about a month in her undergrad. She was allowed to do so. So things like this happen
Don’t go by what classmates tell you. And don’t worry about other people think. You have your life as they have theirs. |
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![]() mrsselig
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Member
Member Since Jan 2019
Location: Florida
Posts: 90
5 34 hugs
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#7
If this is something you are truly not interested in then you should look into transferring into a program that interests you. Don't make the mistake I did. My parents wanted me to go to Nursing school and I did it for them. I've been so unhappy working in the nursing field for the past 27 years I have been stuck in this career I don't like because it's all I know. Talk to your program manager to see what other interests and career change you can make
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Member
Member Since Jan 2019
Location: Florida
Posts: 90
5 34 hugs
given |
#8
If this is something you are truly not interested in then you should look into transferring into a program that interests you. Don't make the mistake I did. My parents wanted me to go to Nursing school and I did it for them. I've been so unhappy working in the nursing field for the past 27 years I have been stuck in this career I don't like because it's all I know. Talk to your Advisor to see what other interests and career change you can make
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