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#1
I want to quit my work. I work via contract in healthcare that caters to low-income population. Very low-pay, lots of volunteer hours, unreimbursed costs, taking my work home, working so hard for so less in the name of helping people.
Being an INFJ, the selfless-sacrifice used to be a joy. But now I am burnt out. I want to get "a real job" (like people always tell me to get) and earn a descent income and have a descent standard of living. I think what added to my burnout is the trauma of being taken advantage of severely by people outside of my work (i.e. family and friends). How do you bounce back from a burnout? How long is it supposed to take? I'm losing inspiration for philanthropy. I'm starting to ask, "What about me and my needs?" I find myself with selfish thoughts like, "I'm going to lose so much gas money in commute again this morning," even though it's for the sake of helping people. Last edited by Anonymous43949; Mar 06, 2019 at 12:20 AM.. Reason: tyo due to exhaustion |
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Bill3, megabit, MickeyCheeky
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Bill3, MickeyCheeky
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#2
I'm a Cna and love the elderly. Taking care of my Poppy (great-grandfather) with my mom, inspired me to go into healthcare when I was younger. I always used to pick up hours, cover shifts, stay late, go in early.. never said no. For a long time. Then I started getting tired and cranky. Not enough days off. Not enough time to care for me or my home. Money was great but everything else was crap. I had to start saying no.. but it was already to late.. mental decline at that point. Depression started. Major anxiety and panic attacks. Cut hours more till I gave my 2 weeks and then quit that out of desperation. It was h*ll.. didn't work for a few years. Was not at all ready but went back to it anyway. Only made it a year before complete collapse happened again.
It's been 5 years.. I'm going for it AGAIN. I've quit persistent issues I'm in a better place and I know how to say no and have boundaries to keep from killing myself at work. I'm no longer going to cheat lift and break my body either. We have machines for that. So move to a job with the same joy of helping but create better definitions for yourself. Better pay, gas reimbursement. Mileage reimbursement. Overtime. Pay differential for evenings/nights/weekends. __________________ Im not crazy, my reality is just different than yours. |
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Anonymous43949, MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky, saidso
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#3
For me burnout is more personal than a work issue. I worked long hours, but when I stopped I burned out even more on life and people challenges.
I struggle with all sorts of issue about taking downtime. Even when I have a routine in place of taking time out to exercise or to care for myself, I seem to have issues all round about.... not giving myself away to friends, and to people generally. Even though I have good boundaries. It's easier to give myself away than to deal with the pain/ fear/ self-hatred inside - and when I deal I just cry which seems stupid really. Probably it's a pattern of restlessness created because no one in my family valued me for me, or even valued themselves for them. An inherited distress pattern. __________________ *"Fierce <-> Reality"* oh god I am struggling today, help me to remember how to stay connected and human! remember: the nut shell against human predators and my own fear! |
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Anonymous43949, MickeyCheeky
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#4
I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, ennie Please don't give up. I understand why you'd feel burnout. Your thoughts are totally valid and they're not selfish at all. Helping others is great, but we need to take care of ourselves as well. Otherwise we won't be able to do our best. I'd suggest to just take a break from it for a while. Perhaps you could try some other job in a similar field. It would be a good way to take a break from your current job and do some new experiences perhaps. After you'll be feeling better, you could dedice whether to come back to that job or not. Hopefully you'll have a stronger sense of self and of your boundaries. They are important. Helping others is a wonderful profession, but try not to neglect yourself! Stay safe and take care of yourself. I'm sure you'll be able to get through this. You're a strong, wonderful person. Trust me when I say that. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this
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Anonymous43949
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#5
Oh yeah I hear you. I love my job but we took major major pay cut in 2009, and didn’t have a single raise since. Nope not kidding. I made more in 2009 than I am making now. This is last year of old contract and we are trying to negotiate for a new contract but I don’t have high hopes. So I hear you.
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Anonymous43949
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#6
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I get burnout though, between school and work, I feel like I can barely do it some days. Do what you think is best for you. Good luck <3 |
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Anonymous43949
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#7
"Real jobs" have boundaries.
Giving away to people instead of looking after your self is a dangerous fiction. There have been organisations to help healthcare professionals take care of their own mental health: Balint Society was one of them. They ran year long peer groups that helped doctors to look after their own emotional health, so as to better care for their patients. __________________ *"Fierce <-> Reality"* oh god I am struggling today, help me to remember how to stay connected and human! remember: the nut shell against human predators and my own fear! |
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Anonymous43949
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healingme4me
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#8
I found that taking any step into analyzing the situation is taking a step forward. One first step that worked for me was taking a notebook and logging every little detail of every little minute for a couple of weeks until I could see how my minutes were spent. I kept the focus of that at work but that's where I realized the bulk of my stress was coming from.
I also started looking at jobs and revising my resume. Instead of jumping ship, I opted to change the tune or dynamics. I know that there's a catchy expression for that, but it's not at the forefront of my thoughts at the moment. And yes, this pertains to going down the path of burning out. However, financial insecurity is not an option for me with three other mouths to feeds and maintaining a roof over their heads at this stage of my life. Yes, I've been addressing this in therapy. Change the Script. There. That's the expression ! How? On screen it looks simplistic. It's not. I hear a lot of learning to say No on this thread. I think it's more than that. It involves prioritizing your time. A clear No may not be called for each moment. Let me think about this. Let me get back to you. Give me a moment. Let me finish this and I'll listen are ways around No because completely shutting down or closing off to can be isolating which negates everything. Back to....looking hard at how time is spent. And keeping eyes open for what is available and sustainable for immediate employment. And will that solve this? |
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Anonymous43949
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#9
Here are two stories that might be relevant.
I know of someone who anticipated burnout from teaching in an urban school district. He gave himself eight years in that line of work. After those eight years, he planned to move on. Which he did. He is at peace now, both with his current work and also with the knowledge of having made a significant contribution. I myself used to listen on a telephone hotline, coincidentally (maybe not so coincidentally) also for eight years. We handled suicide calls but the large majority of the calls were from people who were depressed and/or lonely and/or shut-ins. It was really valuable and important work and I enjoyed it and I never lost interest in the suicide calls but I did eventually, after eight years, start to lose interest in the regular calls. I knew then that I had to move on. Quote:
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Anonymous43949
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#10
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This thought really helps to take the pressure off of my shoulder. Thanks Bill3! |
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Bill3
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