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Old 04-22-2019, 07:57 PM #21
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

Quote:
Originally Posted by BLUEDOVE View Post
Ah,Sisabel,I have just the medicine for you,I hope. When we are kids,we UNconsciously
TRANSFER behaviours/words/feelings/etc.,from our parents to ourselves,thennn,we think
that they originated from US! We blame ourselves for having our PARENTS negativity which
we TRANSFERRED so long ago to ourselves. Those put-downs,criticisms,etc.,don't even
BELONG to you!
Respectfully,
BLUEDOVE


This makes so much sense BlueDove. I do remember thinking thoughts like this at a very, very young age. I felt unloved. I always noticed when other kids were loved or werent loved. This is a legacy passed down to me through the generations. Thank you for teaching me to step back and look at the big picture. Beating Myself Up Again
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Old 04-22-2019, 08:00 PM #22
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

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Originally Posted by Mopey View Post
Sissy, Im just going to jot down a couple of quick thoughts because Ive got to go out to dinner. But.....



I can relate. I, probably like you, am overly sensitive and an introvert. Our society does not admire these things and will bombard you with its disapproval from all sides. So its doubly hard when you try to think well of yourself



What has finally helped me is to accept that that is how I am and I wont basically change, and then make a real effort not to think about these things any more. When the self-critical thoughts start to kick in, stop them. No one else can do this for you. I use an image of shioving them down a garbage shute before they can get into my head and start doing damage to the spirit within



Eckhart Tolle says DONT THINK! I believe hes right.


Yes, I am a sensitive introvert who thinks way too much. Thank you for that visual reminder. Youre right. This is something I have to try very hard to change. This evening as I picked up doggie poop from the yard... I tried to throw the negative thoughts out with the poop.
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Old 04-26-2019, 11:04 AM #23
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Ive been reading a book on Mind Hacking. Im learning some good tips on how to change the thought loops in my head. This is doable. Its a lot of work. But doable. Beating Myself Up Again
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Old 04-26-2019, 03:13 PM #24
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

I wish you well in all efforts to think happier thoughts, Sisabel. You often read in the therapeutic literature that feelings follow thoughts.

Personally I've had the best luck with trying not to think at all! (lol) (Naturally there will be exceptions, as sometimes you'll have to think your way through logistical situations, and of course you're going to have feelings, which you pretty much can't get rid of other than to distract yourself. You end up having to abide with them much of the time, uncomfortable though they may be.

I work between and around these challenges myself, every day, every hour, every minute. I wish us both well in trying to heal from the constant messages that we're of little value.
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Old 05-19-2019, 05:07 PM #25
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sisabel View Post
I’ve been reading a book on Mind Hacking. I’m learning some good tips on how to change the thought loops in my head. This is doable. It’s a lot of work. But doable. Beating Myself Up Again
I highly recommend exploring the contents of these two books (if you haven't previously):

* 'The Power Of Now' (E. Tolle)
* 'The Untethered Soul' (M. Singer)

Do you know the expression - "You are your own worst enemy"?

Well I think it's more appropriately said - "Your physical mind can be your own worst enemy"

You ultimately exist as something which supersedes (transcends) the activity of your physical mind (brain) - which is merely a part of the temporary physical body...

The key is to move in the direction of gradually detaching from and letting go of (relinquishing) one's former & strong conscious identification with activity and influence of the physical mind (brain)... This also entails/requires gradually expanding one's state of awareness and manner of perceiving... This expansion of awareness goes hand-in-hand with a lessening of conscious identification with the physical body, physical mind, physical identity.... One's suffering will lessen and decrease as this process is unfolding...

Also, it helps to come up with some kind of 'mental trick' that you can employ when you find your physical mind acting up, misbehaving, and running wild (in a way that negatively affects you).... Something you can think of or connect with which interupts your mind activity and enables you to pull back (away from it) and disengage (withdraw conscious energy from it)... Preferably something that lightens the mood, or adds a bit of humor to the circumstances... Years back when I was still being hard on myself, I remember connecting with this scene from the movie Liar, Liar - and specifically the part where the other guy enters the bathroom and asks Jim Carrey what he's doing and he responds, "I'm kickin' my xxx!- do you mind!" - and this would lighten my mental state and make me grin/chuckle because that was, in essence, exactly what I was doing to myself (mentally)...

Liar, Liar - Bathroom Scene (Youtube Link)



~WOLF
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