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Old 04-17-2019, 06:57 AM #1
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Default Beating Myself Up Again

I want to change the negative messages I keep telling myself. I want to reprogram my mind so that I stop beating myself up. Itís destructive and Iím hurting myself. Itís no different than alcoholism or drug abuse or any other kind of abuse. It really hurts me it hurts the people around me.

I just now started my whole negative loop of berating myself for not being likeable or loveable and not being good enough. It comes out of nowhere. Right now, in this moment, I am fully believing this message and I wonít change it. Yes, I will reflect later and see the damage Iím doing and I will see that itís simple to just come up with phrases to counteract the negative. But right now I am catching myself in the act of beating myself up and I just donít put a stop to it, even though I know itís not logical.

So Iím writing these thoughts now to interrupt this abusive process I put myself through. I donít know what else to do because I just wonít stop beating myself up. I donít want to do this anymore.
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Old 04-17-2019, 07:01 AM #2
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

What triggered the negative self-talk?

When I beat myself up, itís because something negative happened to me, which triggered my emotional reaction, which then makes me feel everyone hates me for my emotional reaction, then beating myself up for that.
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Old 04-17-2019, 07:13 AM #3
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

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Originally Posted by TishaBuv View Post
What triggered the negative self-talk?



When I beat myself up, itís because something negative happened to me, which triggered my emotional reaction, which then makes me feel everyone hates me for my emotional reaction, then beating myself up for that.


I have developed this habit of randomly looking through peopleís Facebook pages and beating myself up for not having friends and family like I am convinced everybody else has. In my irrational moments, I am convinced that everybody but me has loving friends and family. To me, success is not material things and money, itís having friends and family. I tell myself I am a failure.

Then at work I feel isolated because I donít make friends at work like Ďeveryone elseí does. I tell myself I am an outcast.

None of this is logical but I just want to put all this out there and make myself just see it... and see it for what it is. Itís an ugly and hurtful way to treat myself.

I really believe that I am a bad and unloveable person. I really do. I really am genuinely surprised when people like me.

This is no way to live life. Itís not. I believe that I should appreciate life and appreciate the blessings in my life. Emotionally, I donít act that way though. I can now see how much I hurt myself and also... I hurt others because of all this.
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Old 04-17-2019, 08:00 AM #4
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

Iím sure that many do have truly loving friends and family. The struggles that brings me here, are of the same nature; not having truly loving friends and family. The facebook photos seem so beautiful and the image of the impression, but no one knows the shyt that just went done before the smiling photo was snapped!

Can it be truly loving friends and family are seriously lacking in reality in todayís society as a whole?
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Old 04-17-2019, 10:17 AM #5
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

Quote:
Originally Posted by TishaBuv View Post
Iím sure that many do have truly loving friends and family. The struggles that brings me here, are of the same nature; not having truly loving friends and family. The facebook photos seem so beautiful and the image of the impression, but no one knows the shyt that just went done before the smiling photo was snapped!



Can it be truly loving friends and family are seriously lacking in reality in todayís society as a whole?


Lol. I had to laugh at that about the ďshyte that went down before the photos.Ē I have no tolerance for the shyte. Hehe.
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Old 04-17-2019, 10:18 AM #6
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

I talked to myself all the way to work. I tried to reason with myself logically about all this nonsense. I truly want to stop this behavior pattern. I canít be perfect but I try to be perfect and then I beat myself up. Next Iíll be hard on myself for trying to be perfect....
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Old 04-17-2019, 12:57 PM #7
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

Beating Myself Up Again
Beating Myself Up Again

Beating Myself Up Again
More than one way to look at everything--it can really make you feel tired sometimes. Maybe you are just thinking too hard.
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Old 04-17-2019, 01:22 PM #8
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

I don't know if I can help, but I do that to myself also. The past two relationships ended with the women telling me at length what a horrible person I am because they kept inventories. Any slight I had done over the past five years.. boom. Never forgiven, never forgotten. My mom did that also. Not to me, but she sure knew when this person did her wrong or that one. So, I have internalized it to at least some degree that I am a horrible person. My higher brain knows I'm not, but it's hard to convince the rest of me that is the case. So I tend to shy away from trying to find anyone else, telling myself why bother? I want to fix that, it's why I am here.
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Old 04-17-2019, 05:45 PM #9
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

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Originally Posted by Sam Vimes View Post
I don't know if I can help, but I do that to myself also. The past two relationships ended with the women telling me at length what a horrible person I am because they kept inventories. Any slight I had done over the past five years.. boom. Never forgiven, never forgotten. My mom did that also. Not to me, but she sure knew when this person did her wrong or that one. So, I have internalized it to at least some degree that I am a horrible person. My higher brain knows I'm not, but it's hard to convince the rest of me that is the case. So I tend to shy away from trying to find anyone else, telling myself why bother? I want to fix that, it's why I am here.


Iím very sorry you were treated that way Sam. Women can be that way sometimes. I am worried maybe I have been that way too and I work so very hard to be positive and kind as much as I can. I hope you find someone better suited for you who lifts you up instead of stomping on you.
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Old 04-17-2019, 05:47 PM #10
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Default Re: Beating Myself Up Again

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Originally Posted by Nowinners View Post
Beating Myself Up Again

Beating Myself Up Again



Beating Myself Up Again

More than one way to look at everything--it can really make you feel tired sometimes. Maybe you are just thinking too hard.


Oh my. I am Linus. It does make me tired. I never stop thinking.
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