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Marylin
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Default Jul 13, 2019 at 01:28 PM
  #1
I was going to see the film the Matrix at 8pm tonight!Visit mum at hospital first.I visited mum Thursday and nurses left her on bed pan unattended for twenty mins and she got back pain.I told the nurse off told her mum was blind and had Charles Bonnet syndrome which means she hallucinate and has no spatial awareness or sense of time.She just dismissed me!Well today I was visiting and they asked me to leave while they put mum on commode and they left her alone again with curtains round her and she was screaming in pain and I alerted them but they ignored me.Then there was an almighty crash!Mum had fallen off the commode and banged her forehead on the bed and cut it open blood everywhere and a deep gash.Shr had to have stitches and a CT scan.My sister rushed to hospital who is a narc and I hadn't seen her for 5 years cos she abused me severely over 40 years.But today she was good and I remembered her when she was loving.She came and could see both mum and I were in shock!Anyway I blamed myself for what happened to mum I tried to warn the nurses but they ignored me.Then when I left a taxi driver for the firm I use now remembered me for when he worked for the firm I usedc7 years ago that I used to complain about the route and he shouted and verbally abused me!

I am very upset I feel that everyone is nasty and selfish andbuncaring.I am tired and lonely.I feel mum and I are unloved and unwanted.I am in a lot of emotional pain.I want to cry but the tears are stuck and won't come out.I feel lost and abandoned.I am at the cinema complex but don't want to go in and see the film and be surrounded by people who don't care!

If anyone here can console me and emotionally support me I'd appreciate it.I am in shock for what happened to mum because of the nurses neglect and I feel guilty cos I was there when it happened and I didn't do enough to help mum.I feel it's my fault.I am full of self hatred and pain.I love my sister still she subjected me to 40 years abuse.We are stuck together looking after mum who forgets who she is where she is what year it is it is so painful.I don't know how to take care of my own feelings right now yet alone mum.I can't see the film as planned and I am going home to an empty house.I wish I could end it all I am fed up of the pain and being hated and the self hatred!
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Marylin
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Default Jul 13, 2019 at 01:33 PM
  #2
I feel a knot of emotional pain and I am still in shock over what happened to mum.I want someone who understands my pain to comfort me!I want a hug I want someone to say I am important to them and they love me.I am alone unloved unwanted!I want to cry so the pain ends nobody feels for me!
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Default Jul 13, 2019 at 02:37 PM
  #3
I feel pain for mum too who will love her help her take care of her hold her stop her pain my tears are for her as well as me.I can't stand the uncaring cruelty in the world.I am so afraid and in so much pain.
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Default Jul 13, 2019 at 03:03 PM
  #4
I'm really sorry you had all that - life can be hard and cruel at times.
You are a good person, you deserve better.
Please, stay strong. It will be ok, it will get better.

Sending cyber platonic hugs your way.

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Default Jul 13, 2019 at 03:18 PM
  #5
Quote:
Originally Posted by Marylin View Post
I was going to see the film the Matrix at 8pm tonight!Visit mum at hospital first.I visited mum Thursday and nurses left her on bed pan unattended for twenty mins and she got back pain.I told the nurse off told her mum was blind and had Charles Bonnet syndrome which means she hallucinate and has no spatial awareness or sense of time.She just dismissed me!Well today I was visiting and they asked me to leave while they put mum on commode and they left her alone again with curtains round her and she was screaming in pain and I alerted them but they ignored me.Then there was an almighty crash!Mum had fallen off the commode and banged her forehead on the bed and cut it open blood everywhere and a deep gash.Shr had to have stitches and a CT scan.My sister rushed to hospital who is a narc and I hadn't seen her for 5 years cos she abused me severely over 40 years.But today she was good and I remembered her when she was loving.She came and could see both mum and I were in shock!Anyway I blamed myself for what happened to mum I tried to warn the nurses but they ignored me.Then when I left a taxi driver for the firm I use now remembered me for when he worked for the firm I usedc7 years ago that I used to complain about the route and he shouted and verbally abused me!

I am very upset I feel that everyone is nasty and selfish andbuncaring.I am tired and lonely.I feel mum and I are unloved and unwanted.I am in a lot of emotional pain.I want to cry but the tears are stuck and won't come out.I feel lost and abandoned.I am at the cinema complex but don't want to go in and see the film and be surrounded by people who don't care!

If anyone here can console me and emotionally support me I'd appreciate it.I am in shock for what happened to mum because of the nurses neglect and I feel guilty cos I was there when it happened and I didn't do enough to help mum.I feel it's my fault.I am full of self hatred and pain.I love my sister still she subjected me to 40 years abuse.We are stuck together looking after mum who forgets who she is where she is what year it is it is so painful.I don't know how to take care of my own feelings right now yet alone mum.I can't see the film as planned and I am going home to an empty house.I wish I could end it all I am fed up of the pain and being hated and the self hatred!


I am so sorry for what happened to your mom

please don't blame yourself. the nurses at the hospital shouldn't have ignored you. they are their (or should be their) to make sure everyone is looked after, and if I was in your situation round about now I'd have made a complaint about the lack of care to someone who clearly needed it.

hugs.. I'm here if you need to talk, anytime- don't feel you're disturbing me or making things difficult, it's what I'm here for to listen.

I hope your mom will be okay too. please keep us updated
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Default Jul 13, 2019 at 05:04 PM
  #6
I am sorry this happened and you are in the middle of this. First off what happened to your mum is not your fault. It is th fault of the Nurse and they should be called on it. I don't know if your mum has a Social Worker working with you, your sister, and your mum but this should definitely be reported to the Social Worker if your mum has one. If not you should definitely report it to the Head Nurse of the unit or the Administrator of the hospital. That was neglect what those Nurses did and they know it. It is definitely not your fault.

I also hope you can use this to get together more with your sister and continue to possible mend the relationship with your sister.
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Default Jul 13, 2019 at 05:21 PM
  #7
Thank you Pygmalion,Raging Vortex and Misery business for your support and reassurance.My sister has tried to comfort me too saying it's not my fault I warned the nurses and they ignored me it's their fault!

Mum was given a local anaesthetic to numb her forehead so she didn't feel pain while they stitched up the gaping wound in her forehead and they gave her a painkiller and antibiotics.She was placed in an observation bay and one of the nicer nurses is going to look after her.They promised us she wouldn't be left unattended again.She was comfortable when I left without pain and she slept.
I am a little better still in shock and upset.I found the harsh way the nurses dismissed my concerns and seeing mum injured was traumatizing for me.

Thank you all so much I really appreciate your kind words!
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Default Jul 13, 2019 at 06:55 PM
  #8
I’m so terribly sorry. My heart hurts to read your story. I hope you’re able to find some help. This is terrible. Best of luck to you. Very very upset and no one to support me!
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