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orangyred
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Member Since: May 2015
Location: my own little world
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Unhappy Jul 15, 2019 at 09:21 AM
  #1
The quick gist is that I forwarded a message from my boss that made me pissy and said a bad word which got flagged by IT and ended up...you guessed it...at my bosses desk.

I'm torn with my feelings. On one hand I feel guilty. I got caught. I feel bad that my boss learned that I was upset. On the other hand I cannot figure out why. I vent to my boss about other people all the time. It's what we do as people to help us cope. But now I'm in trouble because of it.

In fact, I've gotten way madder at my husband and said way worse things. So why is this one bugging me so much?

How do I let it go and move on? Because it's getting to me now I have started having a lot of negative feelings towards my boss. I like my boss! I don't want this to deteriorate. I just want to move one.

Ugh...I'm frustrated.

The other thing I'm stuck on is that now I feel like I can't vent. About anything. Or anybody. At least at work.

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Anonymous48672
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Default Jul 15, 2019 at 09:31 AM
  #2
Venting at work isn't constructive and you were reprimanded because its' unprofessional to write an email that trash talks your own supervisor. I think you need to find a better way to cope with the stress of your workplace. Venting is cyclical and doesn't solve anything...ever.

You should never vent to the same person -- your boss -- every day. Not only will it wear down your boss' patience with you as his employee, but he'll begin to view you as someone who is emotionally unstable; someone who can't handle the pressures at their workplace; someone whom he can't depend on to get the job done.

Now that you've been caught via email venting, that shows you to be the office "brooder." Brooders are constantly angry about something all the time and never let things go. They complain all the time.

The only way you can salvage your reputation at work and your relationship with your boss is to 1) stop venting to him and 2) stop venting to your coworkers via email. Otherwise, you'll become that toxic colleague that everyone wants to avoid -- including your own boss.

Use this an opportunity to really figure out why you are this way: why do you need to complain and vent all the time? That's not good for your health to be in a constant state of negative state of mind, and its not good for your workplace environment.

You will need to either look for a new job or figure out a different way to release all of that negativity that you accrue at work everyday. You clearly hate it there or you wouldn't vent to your boss about other people all the time -- which is a very unprofessional thing to do, fyi. When you leave that job and ask your boss for a reference, do you think he's going to give you a positive reference if you just complain to him every day about your coworkers who bug you?

Maybe when you feel like you want to explode or vent, you can leave your work area and go outside for a 10 minute walk. Or, start a journal and write down your frustrations with your coworkers. Or, talk to them about your frustrations with their work in a constructive, positive way so that you don't need to talk about them behind their backs to your boss anymore.
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