My father, my job

Having a hard time with both at the moment... my father is 80 years old, and is at end stage COPD, his lung cancer has also returned, and now he has afib issues with his heart. I was visiting him today and he was having difficulty. His girlfriend of many years and he decided a trip to the hospital would be best, so they called the ambulance. It was very difficult to watch paramedics in the house assessing my father then loading him onto a gurney and wheeling him from the house. And now he's in the hospital again for who knows how long. I'm having a lot of anxiety over his situation and his eventual passing, which will be coming sooner rather than later. As the oldest of the kids I will be tasked with handling his affairs after his death, and that terrifies me, even though he has gone over things with me. I need a coping strategy for preparing for his passing.
As far as work, I got a job in my field in my town ( after previously having an hour commute each way), and I like the job, but my new coworkers are starting to show their true colors after a couple months and I'm not liking what I'm seeing. One factor is an age difference, as I'm in my 50s, and most of them are in their 20s. I find they are snippy towards me, not interested in learning about me as a new coworker, and I feel like they are always annoyed with me. Consequently I don't really engage with them except for work related things. They are causing me to second guess myself on everything, and that is a horrible way to go about the day. I am still on my probation period for another month, but am beginning to feel like I made a mistake. My field is veterinary medicine, and the doctors I work for think I'm going to be fine. It's been a huge learning experience from any other practice I've been at. How do I get my confidence back? Thank you in advance for any help or advice!!

Ignore the gossip. Pretend that you do not know what they are talking about and that it doesnt affect you. IME the 20-somethings in newish jobs all band together into one giant monster and ostracize people. If they do not know it bothers you they will give up. If your bosses like you that is all that matters.

Hi birdiegirl,

I think it's good that you know that you need a coping strategy for when your father passes away. And I'm so so sorry that you have to deal with this right now. When my mother passes away I will be a wreck. I can relate to your feelings because I think that I would really struggle too if all the responsibilities of the funeral were put on me for my mother. It makes sense to me that you are anxious about this. I think a lot of people would be anxious about something like that. Back to the coping strategy, I'm not entirely sure I know the right words to tell you. But I suppose that if it were me, I would have a coping strategy as well. Things I would consider doing would be looking at it as my own personal challenge. Maybe seeing myself as the character the main character in a book and this is her Adventure. I think also being able to lean on other people can help. As well as taking time for you. Do things to reward yourself, and comfort yourself. Do things you like in between those difficult things you have to get done. Again I'm so sorry about your father.

In terms of your job, I think that 20-somethings are weird, truly, LOL. It is an age of immaturity. If the doctors tell you that you are doing a good job, believe them. You don't have to be friends with the people who make you feel uncomfortable. Maybe making friends outside of work might help that is if that is something you struggle with. I don't want to assume. I'm sorry that your coworkers are causing you to lose confidence and I'm sorry that they are snippy. That would make me uncomfortable as well. Did you have confidence before? What is the difference between then and now?