Someone at my workplace died.

09:07 PM

Someone I have worked with and is a co-worker died this past weekend. I don't know how to feel about it. I knew her but just a bit.

And they say she died of a heart attack but I am 48 and so is she and I can' t imagine that. She didn't seem large or to have any risk factors.

People were suggesting earlier when there was no facts that it was suicide. 13 months ago her husband died of ALS which he was diagnosed with shortly after they got married. And yesterday, the day of her death, was the anniversary date. So I remain suspicious. It would be just the type of thing that family might say if it was suicide.

But other people say she was very devoted to her job and the people who depend on her and she wouldn't leave them, but...

June55 · Nov 18, 2019 at 09:52 PM

I’m sorry that happened. Stick with facts. She gone and it may sting.

Discombobulated · Nov 19, 2019 at 11:03 AM

You're bound to wonder, especially with the anniversary.

People can and do die suddenly of natural causes however, one of my colleagues did a few years ago - for a long time we were expecting her to just walk through the door, it's shock.

Nov 20, 2019 at 06:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Discombobulated

You're bound to wonder, especially with the anniversary. People can and do die suddenly of natural causes however, one of my colleagues did a few years ago - for a long time we were expecting her to just walk through the door, it's shock.

The obituary was posted and this person was 47 when she died from a massive heart attack (supposedly) that seems suspicious given her age.

Also the obit does not say how she died just that she unexpectedly died.

I guess I don't really care but I do feel like everyone is just running with this, she died from heart issues and now we have to be really careful and it is annoying me. Especially when I have my doubts.

My co worker is angry that people are spreading the "rumor" it was suicide but it seems like she is spreading it.... she even commented yesterday that at dinner one night they discussed suicide but she said she would never do it because she knew she wouldn't end up with her husband. To me it is beyond odd that anyone would discuss such a thing with a co worker unless she was thinking about it.

MickeyCheeky · Nov 20, 2019 at 07:43 AM

I am so sorry for your Loss, Emily!

Even though you did not know Her personally, this Death must have still hit you in one way or another. I agree that there may be some doubts about it, but then again, perhaps it doesn't really matter when we're talking about Death? I do believe her Family has every right to not disclose any private information. In any case, I understand what you mean!

Sending many Thoughts and Prayers to All of You!

Discombobulated · Nov 20, 2019 at 08:02 AM

You mention your co-worker is angry about the rumours, but that she herself talked about a personal conversation she had with this woman about suicide. Anger is often related to fear. She could be frightened by the very idea this woman may have harmed herself, therefore reacting strongly against any suggestion she did.

I think any sudden death brings shockwaves through a workplace, suicide even more so (because then we have the 'what if we had said something different to her/could we have helped' thoughts).

I think anger and upset will be something that may be around for a while. There's no doubt these things can impact on workplaces. Is there any sort of help/guidance available for colleagues at your company? Some bigger companies do have help, either formally with grief counselling or informal discussions available.

Buffy01 · Nov 29, 2019 at 11:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Emily Fox Seaton

Someone I have worked with and is a co-worker died this past weekend. I don't know how to feel about it. I knew her but just a bit.

And they say she died of a heart attack but I am 48 and so is she and I can' t imagine that. She didn't seem large or to have any risk factors.

People were suggesting earlier when there was no facts that it was suicide. 13 months ago her husband died of ALS which he was diagnosed with shortly after they got married. And yesterday, the day of her death, was the anniversary date. So I remain suspicious. It would be just the type of thing that family might say if it was suicide.

But other people say she was very devoted to her job and the people who depend on her and she wouldn't leave them, but...

I'm sorry to hear about your friend. Have you request an autopsy? I understand how you feel.

Buffy01 · Nov 29, 2019 at 12:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Emily Fox Seaton

The obituary was posted and this person was 47 when she died from a massive heart attack (supposedly) that seems suspicious given her age.

Also the obit does not say how she died just that she unexpectedly died.

I guess I don't really care but I do feel like everyone is just running with this, she died from heart issues and now we have to be really careful and it is annoying me. Especially when I have my doubts.

My co worker is angry that people are spreading the "rumor" it was suicide but it seems like she is spreading it.... she even commented yesterday that at dinner one night they discussed suicide but she said she would never do it because she knew she wouldn't end up with her husband. To me it is beyond odd that anyone would discuss such a thing with a co worker unless she was thinking about it.

I see what you are saying.

*Beth* · Nov 29, 2019 at 04:24 PM

I have lost a scary number of friends and family to suicide, so when I hear of a younger person dying I almost always wonder if the cause was suicide.

On the other hand, I know people who were relatively young, in excellent shape, and suddenly died of a heart attack.

My own father was 6'3", athletic, and had a heart attack when he was 52. A complete shock; it just seemed all wrong. He lived through it, but had to have surgery and so on.

The bottom line is that I'm sorry for the loss of your co-worker. Whatever the cause, it's a shock for someone that young to suddenly die.

possum220 · Nov 29, 2019 at 07:52 PM

People die at any age from heart attacks. My brother died when he was 15 from a heart attack. On the outside he was a fit youngster. He had an enlarged heart. We didnt see that coming. I have had friends die from suicide. Never see that coming either. Bottom line is grieve if you need for whatever the reason. Their absence will feel odd for a time.

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June55 Member Member Since Jun 2013 Posts: 270 10 366 hugs given	Nov 18, 2019 at 09:52 PM #2 I’m sorry that happened. Stick with facts. She gone and it may sting.
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Discombobulated Grand Magnate Member Since Oct 2019 Location: UK Posts: 4,684 (SuperPoster!) 4 11.6k hugs given	Nov 19, 2019 at 11:03 AM #3 You're bound to wonder, especially with the anniversary. People can and do die suddenly of natural causes however, one of my colleagues did a few years ago - for a long time we were expecting her to just walk through the door, it's shock.
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possum220 Legendary Member Since Jan 2009 Location: Uppa Gumtree West Posts: 19,397 (SuperPoster!) 15 7,983 hugs given	Nov 29, 2019 at 07:52 PM #10 People die at any age from heart attacks. My brother died when he was 15 from a heart attack. On the outside he was a fit youngster. He had an enlarged heart. We didnt see that coming. I have had friends die from suicide. Never see that coming either. Bottom line is grieve if you need for whatever the reason. Their absence will feel odd for a time.
	Reply With Quote