Feeling hopeless

This is gonna be long please read.The guy character from a video game I’ve been in love with just got a gf in game and I’m absolutely destroyed by it. To me it never mattered that’s he’s not real my feelings are his story he was supposed to be a loner yet they put him with a girl last minute for no reason. I’m done with game. I compare myself to this girl character I hate her I’ll never look like her. Besides that I feel like real love for me is never gonna happen. My real life experience is same I’ve always been rejected by that guys I liked and the girls they chose are just the same as the girl character. I feel like I’ll never find love first no real guy is probably gonna compare to the guy character which I hate it but that’s way I feel. Even if I found a guy they wouldn’t like me. Guys seen prejudice against women in their 30s guys my age are the worst for that I seen many hateful things online about any women over 30. Society is extremely shallow vain and I hate most people.I’m at the point where it’s better to accept I’ll be single forever I missed my chance and it’s over. The thing is I’ll always want a bf that’ll never go away. It’s hard for me to accept that. My identity has always been about the guys I like I’m lost now. I have no identity now. This character has finished me off I haven’t taken care of myself I been too busy obsessing over him all for it to amount to this. I’m depressed I don’t even want to get out of bed brush my hair nothing. I know people are tell me to get therapy but I did I’ve tried everything. Please give me advice how to deal with these feelings

Hi Neverever86,

I'm sorry that you are suffering. I have experienced many of the things you describe so your words have deep meaning for me.

Wish I had an answer but unfortunately I don't. You deserve the things you desire and I hope that somehow and someway that you get them. Wish I knew what else to say to ease your pain. -- Yaowen

Thank you. It hurts that I’m heartbroken over this character but my hocd worries are taking over and messing with me even more

I'm sorry you're struggling! You said you're in your 30s. You're still young in my opinion. I don't have much advice, but try to be nice to yourself, especially during hard times. it will get better.

It's a hard struggle on such an unforgiving rocky path, and I feel for you. Except when you feel helpless, you need to remember is that this situation is not permanent. It is temporary and given time it will change; it will. You should always remember this and make an effort to keep your mind positive. You need to try hard to improve the situation even when it seems that your efforts are making no difference. You need to think beyond your current situation. Make short term and long term goals to beat the severity of situations. Keep yourself motivated and inspired. Eventually, all of what I've said can significantly show, making you feel better about yourself.

After some time things will definitely start improving and it will boost your courage and hope, like it did mine. A day will come when you will find yourself out of this situation, I promise you.

Our lives are very short, sometimes very exhausting. I realise it is very frustrating to feel like you are situated in such a hard place and the wrong time, like nothing in the world can make you feel better.

I felt it, too.

When I was going through this experience of helplessness over my parent's deaths, I began creating an alternative world of my own, inside my head, that no-one could take from me, where no-one judges me, where there are no boundaries. It made my dreams possible, made the ones I lost and loved feel closer to me than ever before.

You have to have something to look up to, something to dream about, a passion that can make you be awake all night just of the excitement of doing it the next morning .

And the most important thing:

Love yourself , everyone is unique, and if you don't think that about yourself, then you don't see yourself for who you really are.

Last year my 12 year old daughter said, "When you feel helpless, help someone and you will feel the blessing coming your way. God has many ways to teach us what is important so learn and make your life feel worth it."

Out of the mouths of babes and young ones comes amazing truth.

Thank you all for your advice