I feel so alone and I think all outside my house is bad...

I live in Japan 20 years two daughters I have not seen them after divorce about six years... and I see all as enemies I cannot trust anyone my thoughts take over and I see all outside and I am just waiting for society here to look down on me and and treat me like **** every day, hour, minute that points out to me that I am a worthless human being.

I feel alone and scared all the time, I don’t want to die yet. Someone please help me I cry and cry please help me

You need to remember that god will test every human being. Everyone will go through something in life. We just don’t know what other people going through in their life.Be strong and have faith. Better days are coming. It’s just a matter of time.

I'm sorry you are experiencing so much difficulty. There's an awful lot about your situation I'm not familiar with. So I doubt I can be of much help. But I wanted to at least leave a reply letting you know I read your post... and I wish you well.

One thing I don't know about is how mental health services are provided in Japan. But it strikes me that perhaps what might help is to have someone (a counselor of some sort or a mental health therapist) with whom you can talk all of this through & work out some possible solutions to your situation a bit at a time... (possibly including some psychiatric medication if you're struggling with anxiety & paranoia?) Obviously I don't really know. I'm just throwing out random thoughts here.

One of the problems that can sometimes come up is that we look at our situation as a whole & just become paralyzed by the enormity of it. But if you can break it down into smaller manageable bites & work on those one at a time then you can begin to make progress toward resolving the situation you're in as a whole. At least these are my thoughts with regard to your post.

Here's a link to an article, from PC's archives, that talks about how to get unstuck:

How to Get Unstuck: 7 Really Useful Methods

Best wishes...

I feel so bad what You're going through and how Your feeling ....I understand a little mostly each day that goes by with all going on in the world I get more and more terrified going out ....
I had to walk to mailbox this morning I left real early before alit people were out and walked fast ...mailbox is about 15 minute walk ...I made it there and back in 20 minutes and was relieved when I was home
I live alone ....
But what is helping me so much is PC ....I know I'm not alone as far as feeling this way ...tho everyone goes through different experiences...
I had been doing great for several years til this pandemic and I lost 2 friends ...one to pandemic...
I don't mean to sound so depressing ....I just wanted to write after reading Your post to let You know You're not alone ...
Again I'll say PC is helping me get through this ...it's important to share how we feel ...
I'm glad You're here with us ...if You need to write feel free too ok ....
Just know people care about how You feel ...especially here ...and Youre not alone .....
Stay safe ok ...

My dear friend, I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your kind response is very insightful and very understanding of my situation. Many of your comments are accurate, I feel paralyzed by everything that looks like an enormity. I m afraid of dying and afraid of living. Is this hell? . They have taking my children away from me and that has broken me shattered my soul. And I feel guilty and worthless to live. I take meds and I have a councilor. Is just that it takes so much time for me to internalize for that to make me feel a bit cured friend. Japan is cold society to foreigners.

Thank you sadp8r , what you wrote also means the world to me. I have no friends and my family has completely distanced themselves from me and is good at least to know I can have someone and friends here that I can talk to. Thank you

You’ve been through trauma in having separation from your family and kids. It’s understandable for you to feel as you do. You do have friends on here who will help you talk though these feelings. There are good people in the world.