Family and partner worries-please help.

Hi everyone. I haven’t posted on here for awhile as things have been great but lately I have a few things on my mind that’s caused me to worry before going to bed and caused a disruption in my sleeping patterns.

Firstly, my brother’s girlfriend has come to stay with us for a week. While I don’t have a problem with her as she is very nice, I do however feel very uncomfortable when she comes over. They have baths together late at night when my parents are asleep and god knows what they do in there and I am 2 doors away from the bathroom. It just makes
me uncomfortable. It also annoys me as she does not clean her dishes after she uses them and consequently my mum washes it.
There is a new feeling that has arisen lately. She celebrated her birthday with us and my parents absolutely spoilt her. My dad cooked her lunch and my mum bought her Swarovski jewellery. I feel jealous that my mum is treating her like her own daughter. I guess I am used to being the only girl in the house (apart from my mum of course). While I know I sound selfish and childish, this thought has really been making me sad. I don’t know how to cope with it.

The other thing playing on my mind is that my boyfriend and I have been going out for 2 years but he’s only ever come to my place a handful of times in those two years. I was married before and now divorced and my parents got along well with my ex husband. However now that I have another person in my life I would like my family to be close with him as well and build a good relationship. I have tried hard to get to know his family a lot and I spend more time at his place than he does at mine. It makes me worried to think that what if he and my family never develop a relationship to the point where he’s as close to them as I am to his family? I want him to laugh and joke with my mum and dad and brother but when he comes over he doesn’t speak as much (naturally because he doesn’t know them very well) and my dad doesn’t initiate that much conversation with him. I just want them all to get along and for my boyfriend to feel comfortable around them and comfortable enough coming over because he is the one I actually want to have a family with. I would love to read some of your opinions and thoughts on this.

Have you asked him to see them more and told him how you feel?

Yes I have told him how I felt and he says he does want to know then more. It’s hard as he works nightshift and is always exhausted so I understand. The other thing is that my house is just really small and we only have 1 lounge, but my family and I are going to be moving into our new house soon which has more space and gives us some privacy too so I haven’t Invited him over as often because of that reason.