Pondering on relationships

I often think about the friends I've lost and that boy I've never dated and I'm just grateful because I've only lost people that didn't deserve me. No true friend would judge someone on there past and if they do there not true friends sometimes I regret the people that I gave the parts of me because they didn't deserve it and nobody deserves to **** on the true me but if all that happened maybe, I would of never realised who I truly was. So to the people that judged a version of me that I no longer am everyday I thank god from stopping me from ever dating that person I didn't know it but he knew better than anyone that that boy ten years or eleven years ago wasn't the right man for me. So if I ever had a doubt I know that the universe has had its unique way of protecting me from the wrong men and over time I've been able to leave toxic men in particular behind. I don't look back in regret but I look but with compassion knowing the lessons it took for me to be here. The truth is nobody has the right to judge me for who I liked. If I'm being honest I've liked far worse people that were much toxic than some teacher that I had a crush on and never did anything with so who the **** can say I'm desperate who gives a flying **** what they think. To me this crush is a massive upgrade and yes it's just a crush and whatever but there was never any disrespect and I can say that it means more than the guys I dated that disrespected me so who gives a **** what people think??? It's my life my heart it can do whatever it wants I don't live for people's opinions and if they wanna judge me they go always mind there own business and piss off from my life... The door is there I no longer give a **** who walks out because better people always walk in.