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Jenny R
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Member Since: Aug 2016
Location: the big city in the midwest
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Heart Oct 19, 2016 at 06:08 PM
  #1
I have been depressed most of my life and on medication + therapy for many years. Things took a turn for the worse in June. I went from being depressed to being seriously apathetic and fatigued. I was numb and had no desire to do anything but watch tv and sleep.

I brought this to the attention of my therapist and we couldn't find a trigger. My Pdoc agreed and wanted to add a 3d medication called Rexulti. I was fearful of the side effects and afraid of gaining even more weight. I didn't know what to do and my husband suggested I see our regular doctor who would consider the side effects and treat me in a more holistic manner. I saw the doc and we agreed that I would think about it and decide if I wanted to continue with my Pdoc or see him. He also advised that Rexulti was expensive (like $900/month) and not covered by insurance. He said Abilify was in the same class and to think about that. That night the depression started to lift.

I haven't felt the heavy weight of depression since. I know I am not depressed but I am still on my meds and wouldn't think of quitting. My T tried to help me find out what happened but we couldn't find it. I took even more of a dip after the Pdoc and was in bad shape when I saw my regular doc. The only thing I can think of is spontaneous remission. The timing seems too coincidental. Perhaps I felt relief from seeing my doc and felt there was a way out. Maybe the episode had run its course.

This is the first time I have been aware that I am not depressed at all. I feel normal. I feel so much better. I have a few bad events and a few boring days but most have been good.

I am trying not to push myself too hard so that I can keep what I have. I feel like I am moving forward in my life but still a little fragile. I am not kidding myself that it is gone forever but I will remember this when it does.

I wish I knew what happened and I wish I could share it with all of you. We all deserve to feel better.
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Skeezyks
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Thumbs up Oct 19, 2016 at 07:45 PM
  #2
Thanks for sharing your progress, Jenny R!
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marcoleap
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Default May 16, 2017 at 05:08 PM
  #3
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jenny R View Post
I have been depressed most of my life and on medication + therapy for many years. Things took a turn for the worse in June. I went from being depressed to being seriously apathetic and fatigued. I was numb and had no desire to do anything but watch tv and sleep.

I brought this to the attention of my therapist and we couldn't find a trigger. My Pdoc agreed and wanted to add a 3d medication called Rexulti. I was fearful of the side effects and afraid of gaining even more weight. I didn't know what to do and my husband suggested I see our regular doctor who would consider the side effects and treat me in a more holistic manner. I saw the doc and we agreed that I would think about it and decide if I wanted to continue with my Pdoc or see him. He also advised that Rexulti was expensive (like $900/month) and not covered by insurance. He said Abilify was in the same class and to think about that. That night the depression started to lift.

I haven't felt the heavy weight of depression since. I know I am not depressed but I am still on my meds and wouldn't think of quitting. My T tried to help me find out what happened but we couldn't find it. I took even more of a dip after the Pdoc and was in bad shape when I saw my regular doc. The only thing I can think of is spontaneous remission. The timing seems too coincidental. Perhaps I felt relief from seeing my doc and felt there was a way out. Maybe the episode had run its course.

This is the first time I have been aware that I am not depressed at all. I feel normal. I feel so much better. I have a few bad events and a few boring days but most have been good.

I am trying not to push myself too hard so that I can keep what I have. I feel like I am moving forward in my life but still a little fragile. I am not kidding myself that it is gone forever but I will remember this when it does.

I wish I knew what happened and I wish I could share it with all of you. We all deserve to feel better.
Did it cause any blunting of emotions?
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WeAreArt
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Posts: 14
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Smile May 29, 2017 at 04:01 PM
  #4
Breathe. These things take time. Please understand, you are hurt and wounded, even though the wounds might not be physically visible. There will come a time when you will be okay, but until then, go easy on yourself. Baby steps, one at a time. You have come a long way, and you have a beautiful journey ahead of you, my friend.
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vickster2017
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Heart Jun 28, 2017 at 09:57 PM
  #5
This is amazing!
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Reco man
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Thumbs up Oct 02, 2017 at 10:47 AM
  #6
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jenny R View Post
I have been depressed most of my life and on medication + therapy for many years. Things took a turn for the worse in June. I went from being depressed to being seriously apathetic and fatigued. I was numb and had no desire to do anything but watch tv and sleep.

I brought this to the attention of my therapist and we couldn't find a trigger. My Pdoc agreed and wanted to add a 3d medication called Rexulti. I was fearful of the side effects and afraid of gaining even more weight. I didn't know what to do and my husband suggested I see our regular doctor who would consider the side effects and treat me in a more holistic manner. I saw the doc and we agreed that I would think about it and decide if I wanted to continue with my Pdoc or see him. He also advised that Rexulti was expensive (like $900/month) and not covered by insurance. He said Abilify was in the same class and to think about that. That night the depression started to lift.

I haven't felt the heavy weight of depression since. I know I am not depressed but I am still on my meds and wouldn't think of quitting. My T tried to help me find out what happened but we couldn't find it. I took even more of a dip after the Pdoc and was in bad shape when I saw my regular doc. The only thing I can think of is spontaneous remission. The timing seems too coincidental. Perhaps I felt relief from seeing my doc and felt there was a way out. Maybe the episode had run its course.

This is the first time I have been aware that I am not depressed at all. I feel normal. I feel so much better. I have a few bad events and a few boring days but most have been good.

I am trying not to push myself too hard so that I can keep what I have. I feel like I am moving forward in my life but still a little fragile. I am not kidding myself that it is gone forever but I will remember this when it does.

I wish I knew what happened and I wish I could share it with all of you. We all deserve to feel better.
Hope! Stay faithful to your beliefs. Like there is hope that remission will be lasting, or hope that we will understand the triggers and avoid them from now on. But HOPE (I believe) is the foundation upon which all recovery sits on. Without hope for recovery, why even try right? Thanks for sharing.
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sugarbeeMe
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Default Apr 21, 2018 at 02:16 PM
  #7
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jenny R View Post
I have been depressed most of my life and on medication + therapy for many years. Things took a turn for the worse in June. I went from being depressed to being seriously apathetic and fatigued. I was numb and had no desire to do anything but watch tv and sleep.

I brought this to the attention of my therapist and we couldn't find a trigger. My Pdoc agreed and wanted to add a 3d medication called Rexulti. I was fearful of the side effects and afraid of gaining even more weight. I didn't know what to do and my husband suggested I see our regular doctor who would consider the side effects and treat me in a more holistic manner. I saw the doc and we agreed that I would think about it and decide if I wanted to continue with my Pdoc or see him. He also advised that Rexulti was expensive (like $900/month) and not covered by insurance. He said Abilify was in the same class and to think about that. That night the depression started to lift.

I haven't felt the heavy weight of depression since. I know I am not depressed but I am still on my meds and wouldn't think of quitting. My T tried to help me find out what happened but we couldn't find it. I took even more of a dip after the Pdoc and was in bad shape when I saw my regular doc. The only thing I can think of is spontaneous remission. The timing seems too coincidental. Perhaps I felt relief from seeing my doc and felt there was a way out. Maybe the episode had run its course.

This is the first time I have been aware that I am not depressed at all. I feel normal. I feel so much better. I have a few bad events and a few boring days but most have been good.

I am trying not to push myself too hard so that I can keep what I have. I feel like I am moving forward in my life but still a little fragile. I am not kidding myself that it is gone forever but I will remember this when it does.

I wish I knew what happened and I wish I could share it with all of you. We all deserve to feel better.


How are you doing now?
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