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okiedokie
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Default Aug 25, 2007 at 03:39 PM
  #1
Hi Everyone,
I read all the posts in this forum and truly, I feel your pain. I actually get a visceral response to the helplessness and hopelessness and sadness that you feel.

I also suffered from depression all of my life. Always pushed myself and just assumed that I was born to suffer and it was my lot in life.

Finally, after my mom, grandma and aunt died within one year I suffered a major depressive episode. I never got out of bed. I didn't shower, didn't talk, didn't eat and finally didn't drink either. After a month of this, I was obviously pretty sick, psychotic and finally hospitalized. I had given up. I was afraid to live and afraid to die.

I'm sorry this post is so long, but I wanted to tell you all that with the right meds, therapy and medical care, I got well. If it is difficult to push yourself out the door to get that help, call 911 and go by ambulance. That's how I went. I certainly understand that when you're in the depths of hell, can't think, can't make decisions, can't concentrate, that it feels impossible to make that move. But I'm here to tell you that just by dialing 911 and going to the ER you can get on the road to healing. I did and you can too.

My life is not perfect, but I take the antidepressant every day so I don't get sick again. It made the depression go away! I am so grateful to be alive today. I'm generally happy, productive and most importantly, am here for my children and my family.

Please, please don't give up. Get the help you so richly deserve. I have the utmost respect and love for all of you who suffer from this or any other mental illness.

Again, I'm sorry this is so long and I sure hope it didn't sound speechy. I really do wish all of you love and healing.

Hope Hope Hope Hope Hope

Okie

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freewill
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Default Aug 25, 2007 at 04:39 PM
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your the bestest Okie.... Hope
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ab1018
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Default Aug 25, 2007 at 07:05 PM
  #3
Thank you for the hope Okie.

I too lost my mother and father at too young of an age within 9 months of each other last year.

Unfortunately, I am taking meds, going to therapy and praying, and it's not getting better. I'm at the end of my rope.
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okiedokie
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Default Aug 25, 2007 at 08:40 PM
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Hi ab,
I'm sorry to hear you are in so much pain and also sorry for your recent loss.

Is your pdoc going down the list of available meds to try to find one that works for you? Changing doses etc? As you probably already know, it can take a bit to find the right one and then to get it to a therapeutic level.

I'm so sorry you feel like you're at the end of your rope. Hope I will keep you in MY prayers as well.
Best,
Okie

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Default Aug 26, 2007 at 12:45 AM
  #5
Thank you Okie, the e-mail is helpful and hopeful.

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Default Aug 26, 2007 at 01:10 AM
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Thanks for sharing! It shows that maybe there is some hope one can/will eventually feel better...
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meander
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Default Aug 26, 2007 at 01:54 AM
  #7
Thanks okie!

My latest depression period is just coming to an end I think, I've had one "bad" day in the last two weeks (previous to which it was most days), thanks to the meds and probably to the therapy. It's nice that it feels good to be alive once more...

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Default Aug 26, 2007 at 05:07 AM
  #8
thank you for this okie. thanks for thinking of others when you re going through a tough time in your own life.
i really thought i was getting there until this last icky patch happened. im fighting it as i can but am not doing very well right now. im just trying to hold onto the thought that this is a blip in the road and im going to come out stronger than i was even before it happened. your post helped.
(((((((((((((okie))))))))))))))
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Default Aug 26, 2007 at 05:55 AM
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(((((((okie)))))))))thank you for sharing your story of how you have managed to come out of such a severe depression. I know it was difficult. I find it difficult everyday to take my cocktail of pills, but I do it, not for me, but for my kids...

Hope
Dee

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Default Aug 27, 2007 at 03:40 PM
  #10
I am so glad that you were able to make the right move and get help, and you found the right antidepressant to help you along. I am sorry for all that you have lost. Thank-you for sharing your story. You generally seem like a very kind-hearted person, who has a lot to give.
I would love to give you a hug! Hope
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