[cryingontheinside]

This morning my dad showed up at my place at 8 am without being invited . i was still a sleep . he used spare key to let himself in . he said he sent a text to say he was on his way but I was asleep so obviously i did not know . my place was a little messy . all he did was critisize me. Then he saw i drank a couple of beers last night and he asked me if my new years reslution was to become an alcoholic as well as stuffing my face with food. He wasn't joking . he was annoyed and left promtly. Im tired of it all. Im fed up being judged and critisized by family members. Ugh

[sarahsweets]

This is not ok. Why does he have a key ? I would change the locks and set some boundaries.

[cryingontheinside]

Originally Posted by sarahsweets

This is not ok. Why does he have a key ? I would change the locks and set some boundaries.

When i got my keys , i was given 3. He took 2 keys without asking me and said in case i lose my key . this is not the first time he arrived at mine without me knowing while im asleep and let himself in . my mum treats me even worse than him ( they are separated ) but me and my mum fell out on boxing day because she was screaming at me and i had enough. Im so sick of how family members try to judge me and dictate my life for me . im really struggling with this . its harder for me to achieve my goals when all this happens all the time . as for setting boundaries im kind of scared. My family members make me feel like a child or a disobidient dog . im 37 years of age.

[cryingontheinside]

My older brother phoned me once to shout at me because i don't go out much . i have agaraphobia and social phobia among other things . i guess they have no understanding of mental health

If your dad doesn’t pay your bills he has no right to a key. And even then... it’s still a bit much to ask for a key if he IS paying bills. It’s very hard to draw boundaries with difficult family members. In my experience, it’s their way or no way at all.

[cryingontheinside]

Originally Posted by Sisabel

If your dad doesn’t pay your bills he has no right to a key. And even then... it’s still a bit much to ask for a key if he IS paying bills. It’s very hard to draw boundaries with difficult family members. In my experience, it’s their way or no way at all.

No he doesn't pay my bills . I'm planning to move far away . then they will have to leave me alone

[Thirty shades]

Originally Posted by cryingontheinside

No he doesn't pay my bills . I'm planning to move far away . then they will have to leave me alone

So sorry you have a family that have no respect.

Setting new boundaries is the way forward....

You have rights and to be accepted for your own choices.

Pete Walker, M.A. Psychotherapy

[sarahsweets]

Originally Posted by cryingontheinside

No he doesn't pay my bills . I'm planning to move far away . then they will have to leave me alone

Yes but until then you have to protect yourself. Get new locks or demand the keys back. Or, warn him and report him if it happens again.

hugs to you, crying