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Default Jan 23, 2019 at 04:16 PM
  #41
Doing pretty good. I'm getting stuff done around the house. Repaired a few things. That always gives me a sense if achievement.
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Default Jan 23, 2019 at 06:17 PM
  #42
Not doing well this evening. My online T triggered me. She asked a question that got me very upset. Sometimes I think online therapy is the worst. I don't see how asking these questions helps me. Now I have to ground myself and work on closure and improving my mood.

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Default Jan 24, 2019 at 09:45 PM
  #43
Feeling down and stuck. I fear nothing will ever get better. I guess it will but I still worry sometimes that I'll be this miserable forever.
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Default Jan 24, 2019 at 11:56 PM
  #44
Quote:
Originally Posted by 88Butterfly88 View Post
Feeling down and stuck. I fear nothing will ever get better. I guess it will but I still worry sometimes that I'll be this miserable forever.
I think that you and I must be identical twins. Because that's exactly how I feel. I am feeling down and stuck because of the place I live at. I have moving out on my mind but I can't seem to make time to "plant the seeds" for it. And I'm clueless as to where I could go or what to do.

I got talking to a couple at work. I told them that I was late getting to work because of the heavy traffic. The woman said that she noticed the same thing. And then the guy said that the area is overpopulated. I keep dreaming that I would like to have a small house out in an area where I wouldn't have to worry about bothering anyone else; and vice-versa. It would seem like a very hard reality to come by. Well, if that's what I want, then I have to try harder to make it happen.
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Default Jan 25, 2019 at 03:38 AM
  #45
It's early Friday morning. I feel Okay. Later I have physical therapy. I feel alright about that. Just want it over with so I can relax for the day. I don't really feel like going but it's supposed to help me. I'm trying to have a better attitude about it.

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Default Jan 25, 2019 at 06:02 AM
  #46
I'm in the E.R. with my boyfriend. But he's asleep and I'm okay.
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Default Jan 25, 2019 at 07:06 AM
  #47
I am not doing anything today.

I took a shower and that's my limit.

takes it out of you.. what with all the pain issues.

probably just going to watch bizardvark and try to feel greatful I made it through another week
 
 
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Default Jan 25, 2019 at 07:22 PM
  #48
My appointment today ruined my entire day. All morning long was spent getting ready and stressing out. Then the appointment was hard. After the appointment I was wiped out and slept for hours. My whole day is just wasted. I have to do this twice a week. I refuse. I don't care what they say.

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Default Jan 25, 2019 at 09:34 PM
  #49
It was a high of 3 today but my SAD wasn’t terrible. I have these really warm North Face gloves which help. Being off work and going shopping helped. I really want to wear shorts and my Birkenstock’s though. We decided tonight that we might take a trip to Graceland in the fall. So that might be why the depression isn’t terrible.

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Default Jan 25, 2019 at 11:40 PM
  #50
I had a bad situation two days ago that would normally have plummeted my spirit into a very dark place but I seem to be handling it quite well, which I'm glad about. I seem to do okay as long as I keep to myself :/
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Default Jan 26, 2019 at 05:16 AM
  #51
still in a lot of chronic pain.

getting dressed today was an absolute nightmare and I lost my patience with my back on several ocasions (I know, I'm so bad!)

music on now and just chilling. probably should do something and make the most of the day... but do what, exactly.

it's not like I really want to do anything
 
 
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Default Jan 26, 2019 at 05:57 PM
  #52
It wasn't much of a day today. I did my usual stuff for Saturday. I was going to meet with my friend near where I go shopping. I really preferred him to come to my place instead but he has a hard time with that. As it turned out he didn't show up when I got to the place. He finally showed up as I was checking out of the grocery store. Too late! So we barely spent a couple of minutes together. I really need another friend to replace him but it's hard for me to get. So I ended up feeling depressed and disgusted.

I have been having a headache and runny nose for most of the day. It's been very dry and windy outside. I hope I'm not getting sick.

Also I feel like the searching for a new place is not going very easy. I'm not in a deadline but I feel like I'm not being patient in all of this.
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Default Jan 27, 2019 at 05:22 AM
  #53
yesterday I ordered takeout from the newly opened pizza place. it was nice, I had meat feast with chicken wings

after dinner I watched WWE main event (most of it was good, though I wasn't too kean on the last part)

discovered a new group yesterday called bts (and a new type of music, K-POP) which I think is awesome.

sleep didn't happen for me yesterday and nor did rest

chronic pain not letting up at all and back's really stiff

not much to do today... watch a bit of tv I missed last week (if I can be bothered), and cook something for dinner.

ffeel okay, just the pain sucks. it really, really sucks
 
 
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Default Jan 27, 2019 at 08:44 AM
  #54
I'm not depressed, which is good. I've got some serious dental pain, and I better get that addressed. I am at the hospital a lot, caring for my boyfriend. His condition is serious, but he is quite comfortable most of the time. I have to attend to my own wellbeing better than I'm doing. I've got to get organized and plan out what I do hour by hour. Pretty soon I should leave and go home.
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Default Jan 27, 2019 at 12:49 PM
  #55
I woke up early this morning and got thinking about a lot of things. Mostly about possibly making a move. I ask myself why in my right mind would I want to lower my living standards and increase my monthly domestic expenses? The answer to that is I can't stand my place. Lately it's not that bad, but it's nice this time of year until it warms up then it will be bad.

I'm feeling alright after I had breakfast. I don't know why? It's a real nice day outside. Very sunny with no wind and fairly warm. I physically feel better this morning than I did yesterday. Right now I'm doing the laundry. I'm a bit upset that the laundry has gone up 125% in using it from before.

Last edited by will19; Jan 27, 2019 at 03:48 PM..
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Default Jan 27, 2019 at 04:15 PM
  #56
Feeling sad and lonely. Not sure what to do with myself. Forcing myself to do chores. I feel so blah. I feel bad if I don't get stuff done. I just want to go to bed instead. Maybe I'll feel better when I wake up.

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Default Jan 28, 2019 at 05:42 AM
  #57
Feel better after getting some sleep. I'm staying busy this morning. Getting all my chores out the way. Maybe later I can relax and do something fun.

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Default Jan 28, 2019 at 10:39 AM
  #58
yesterday I was listening to someone on blah therapy who had bipolar and she was telling me that no one understands her and she's sick of people judging her.

I told her I don't do that kind of thing and we got to talking about celebrities with bipolar and what an inspiration they were

she then asked me what my coping methods were and I told her I like to journal, to listen to music, and to watch cartoons.

she goes... you're 25 and you like cartoons?

and diss connected

so the fact I'm too old for cartoons is more important than being understood.... okay. personally I will always watch cartoons, no matter what anyone says.

I am feeling depressed today because.... well... it is a regular, boring day

and when I say regular and boring, it doesn't even cut it

their is nothing happening today. it's almost like this day wasn't meant to be in the calendar or something
 
 
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Default Jan 28, 2019 at 03:28 PM
  #59
Anxious and depressed.
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Default Jan 28, 2019 at 05:11 PM
  #60
Feeling tired and depressed. It's my bed time but I'm not sleepy. Maybe if I color for a while. I got a new coloring book and some new pencils. Maybe my cat will cuddle with me and we can listen to rain sounds.

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