so severely depressed and ashamed. I keep thinking about things.

[Sunflower123]

Feeling a bit sad and down today. Missing my daughter for the first time since she left. I’m trying to stay busy and not let it spiral down into full blown depression. Also, getting the house ready for company so I don’t have time to be moping around. Got to stay active.

I’ve got lots of fun and interesting things planned and I packed my schedule to get around my daughter’s absence. It’s just in the down times and it only started today. I’ll see her Labor Day so I’ll try to focus on that.

Got to work with what I have... can't sleep well.... have to do caretaking for a few days and I was looking forward to getting away until I'm interrupted be numerous things and my desire to sleep is just gone to maddening frustration.

[Rose76]

Today was not a good day. I got nothing done. I feel scared.

[will19]

Today was pretty eventful, but not much social interaction. Went to a church today for the first time in a while. It didn't quite do it for me. So I guess I'll go elsewhere the next time. My friend called me a couple of times today saying it's very hot where he is.

Took a 2 and half hour bike ride today. After that my sister called. It was very nice talking to her.

[3rd rock]

It's literally 32 degrees inside my apartment.

I started my day with just a few hours of sleep. Still, I was eager to get going to give someone some respite from constant care taking. I'm exhausted.

I watched a motivational video this morning. Think positive. You can do anything you want to in life if you change your negative attitude and be grateful. If you're poor, it's your fault.

Sure doesn't seem like it is that simple to me. I guess it should be. How to be thankful while in pain emotionally and physically is still hard for me. Especially when I feel psychiatric medicines ruined my health.

[Deilla]

I'm exhausted and stressed. Too many stressors. I want to try to relax tonight. Maybe I'll just go to bed. I've had 3 naps already today.

[will19]

I didn't sleep well last night because I was blowing my nose starting at 2AM. And then I was blowing my nose and sneezing all day at work. I don't have a cold, just some kind of allergy.

It was a pretty good day at work. It's too bad that the nose blowing and sneezing all day ruined it. I worked out after work and it went well, much to my surprise. Before working out, I felt tired, blowing my nose, and headaches.

My friend is away and will be going on a Ohio River cruise instead of the Mississippi River cruise. It's too bad for him because he has tried to go on that Mississippi River cruise for two years. He told me that it's no big deal going on the Ohio River because he grew up on it.

[Rose76]

After wasting the morning, I got a few things done. I'm disappointed in myself. I feel just awful for hours in the morning. Then I usually feel much better in the afternoon.

[3rd rock]

I will probably have the third book in my series completed by the end of August. I've wasted 2 and a half years of my life working on a series that hardly anyone has read. This is a totally pointless waste of time. It's not only 2 and a half years, I've been working on writing one thing or another since I was 19. So much time and effort wasted on something for nothing.

I am too desperate and lonely. I must remember to keep my vulnerability to myself. I am not among friends. I don't really know how to make sense of things.

[3rd rock]

Another 2,000 words done, that virtually no one will ever read but me. This is pointless and stupid.

[Deilla]

Originally Posted by 3rd rock

I will probably have the third book in my series completed by the end of August. I've wasted 2 and a half years of my life working on a series that hardly anyone has read. This is a totally pointless waste of time. It's not only 2 and a half years, I've been working on writing one thing or another since I was 19. So much time and effort wasted on something for nothing.

Have you watched the movie The Secret? It's about positive attitude and positive results. It's pretty inspirational. It might help you feel better. (((Hugs)))

[3rd rock]

Originally Posted by Deilla

Have you watched the movie The Secret? It's about positive attitude and positive results. It's pretty inspirational. It might help you feel better. (((Hugs)))

I suppose I should be more positive. 8 new sales showed up in my reports last night. So it's like every day that passes is a day that gets me closer to my goal. Or not.

I got a call back from a private psychiatrist's office, saying he'd like to take me as a patient. I'm optimistic about that.

[will19]

An OK day until I got home. I did the laundry at home and it was a disaster. I used two washers and two dryers. One washer finished and left the clothes sopping wet. I panicked and didn't know what to do. So on one dryer I put in extra money and that didn't work. So I ended going to a Laundromat just to dry my clothes and it didn't do a good job of it. It's bad enough as it is to do laundry after work; but then having to put up with that BS with it! My evening was completely ruined, damn it!

[Randle McMurphy]

life is ****ed up, I love someone I can never be with, she will never be mine. this has happened to me every time I had feels for someone over the course of my life, either rejection or impossible conditions. why does god keep torturing me? I don't ask for much, just some love.

Being around someone who is touchy at the smallest things is ruining my better streak of a mood. I haven't had this consistency of well being emotionally in a very long time. I can't let that person affect me, yet I can't get away. I guess I could, but being out in the middle of nowhere is not good for me either.

The care taking was easy, and I do feel like I was a bit useful. I'm meeting a friend later in the week, and I'm hoping to have a nice time for an hour or more.

[Deilla]

Had a productive day. Mainly did chores and self care. I feel Okay. Just a little tired. Will try to relax now.

[3rd rock]

Managed to get on the exercise bike. Trying to use it more.