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Thirty shades
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Default Mar 01, 2019 at 06:17 AM
  #1
What can we do when we cannot resolve something causing such deep profound pain...

Emotion
Physical
Mental

Pain breeds more and more pain........
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Default Mar 01, 2019 at 06:40 AM
  #2
For me I try not to think at all. I try not to allow thoughts to interfere with my emotional wellbeing. Everything just seems to be a constant train of thoughts which I don't feel represent reality at all really, but it's best just to keep it all in check. Right now I'm in an emotional low so my mind has nothing but doom and gloom, half nightmare half fantasy. So yes, I try to switch it off.
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Default Mar 01, 2019 at 10:56 AM
  #3
((((((((( Thirty shades )))))))))



Much love to you

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Default Mar 01, 2019 at 05:17 PM
  #4
I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, Thirty shades I completely agree with what mote.of.soul has already wisely said better than I ever could. I'd suggest to find some distractions if you can. Sometimes the best way to fight pain is to just avoid it for a while. Please don't give up. Depression is an hard beast to fight. I'm sure you'll be able to get through this. Take all the time you need. Just take it one step at the time. Take baby steps. I'm so sorry. It must be very hard for you. Stay strong, Thirty shades. Stay safe and take care fo yourself. You're a wonderful person. You're awesome! You're strong! You're a warrior! Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this
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Default Mar 01, 2019 at 05:55 PM
  #5
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Default Mar 02, 2019 at 12:08 AM
  #6
I'm sorry, Thirty shades.

Like the others said, it's most useful to stop thinking about the emotional pain when it gets out of hand. If you're not problem solving, you're dwelling and just causing more hurt. But I know it's *so* hard to stop. There were times when I just could not. (There are still times I do, but it's much shorter duration these days)

I had some luck with simple breathing meditation. At first, just that. Then even letting the thoughts pass by without letting the emotion in. I never got the hang of "embracing" the emotion.

Here's a link to some audio files I found fairly easy (there's no right or wrong way and it doesn't matter if your mind wanders -- just come back when you are ready).

Guided Meditations - UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center - Los Angeles, CA

I really wasn't interested, but I was in such distress I really had nothing to lose. So it gave me something to do for a time besides being wretched and non-functional. It eased the pain somewhat.

In general, I guess just keep trying anything because you never really know.

One thing I found that helped was not trying to do too much before I was ready. I couldn't get to happy. I needed to just be less miserable. That helped. It made it do-able.

I hope you find some relief.
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Default Mar 02, 2019 at 12:51 AM
  #7
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Originally Posted by CepheidVariable View Post
I'm sorry, Thirty shades.

Like the others said, it's most useful to stop thinking about the emotional pain when it gets out of hand. If you're not problem solving, you're dwelling and just causing more hurt. But I know it's *so* hard to stop. There were times when I just could not. (There are still times I do, but it's much shorter duration these days)

I had some luck with simple breathing meditation. At first, just that. Then even letting the thoughts pass by without letting the emotion in. I never got the hang of "embracing" the emotion.

Here's a link to some audio files I found fairly easy (there's no right or wrong way and it doesn't matter if your mind wanders -- just come back when you are ready).

Guided Meditations - UCLA Mindful Awareness Research Center - Los Angeles, CA

I really wasn't interested, but I was in such distress I really had nothing to lose. So it gave me something to do for a time besides being wretched and non-functional. It eased the pain somewhat.

In general, I guess just keep trying anything because you never really know.

One thing I found that helped was not trying to do too much before I was ready. I couldn't get to happy. I needed to just be less miserable. That helped. It made it do-able.

I hope you find some relief.
Many thanks for the link. I have got out of the habit of meditating. I normally need to be a little more well for it to benefit me.

Thank you everyone for your replies.
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Default Jun 13, 2019 at 01:58 PM
  #8
Much respect and care to you and to all in pain

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Default Jun 13, 2019 at 02:07 PM
  #9
I was in deep pain for a long time about something because I didn't realize or want to admit to myself what was going on. I was in denial. I had to get help to sort it out (therapy and talking on here and to others). It still hurts now that I am facing it in a more head on way but not as much. Confrontation is hard but it may have to be done. Sometimes our pain is giving us an important message.

I did not resolve the issue either--I asked others to help and talked to the person about how I felt. I set brand new boundaries based on what I learned from the people who helped me. It took me years to get to the point I am now which is that I now feel differently about the person. Sometimes our relationships change and we don't know how to adjust to it.

But yes, because it can take so long to accept some things--yes to distraction, medication, and meditation.

Last edited by TunedOut; Jun 13, 2019 at 02:22 PM..
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Default Jun 13, 2019 at 04:29 PM
  #10
Lately my pain has been great
The burden of too many issues to tolerate

Our pain is not understood IRL.

I don't like what people think of us....

Much respect to all those in pain
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Default Jun 13, 2019 at 06:29 PM
  #11
((((((( Thirty Shades )))))))
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Default Jun 16, 2019 at 09:50 AM
  #12
((((((Thirty Shades))))))
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Default Jun 16, 2019 at 12:13 PM
  #13
Thank you ((((((everyone))))))

Sending deep and lasting respect to all
With love and no judgement
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 01:43 AM
  #14
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thirty shades View Post
Lately my pain has been great
The burden of too many issues to tolerate

Our pain is not understood IRL.

I don't like what people think of us....

Much respect to all those in pain
Thirtyshades
It can be hard to comprehend others pain in a helpful way. I am sorry you are suffering.

I think you know we think you are wonderful. Much respect to you. With love and no judgement. Thanks for these messages.
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 02:44 AM
  #15
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Originally Posted by TunedOut View Post
Thirtyshades
It can be hard to comprehend others pain in a helpful way. I am sorry you are suffering.

I think you know we think you are wonderful. Much respect to you. With love and no judgement. Thanks for these messages.
TunedOut.

Sending hugs, respect, compassion and kind thoughts with love and no judgement to you.
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Default Jun 17, 2019 at 07:09 AM
  #16
Much love, respect and kindness to all in this thread

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Default Jun 18, 2019 at 04:28 PM
  #17
I think my pain has an element of panic creeping over me.....
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Default Jun 18, 2019 at 10:39 PM
  #18
Thinking of you Thirty shades and hoping you feel better soon.
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Default Jun 19, 2019 at 06:04 AM
  #19
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I think my pain has an element of panic creeping over me.....
I remember SilverTrees saying anxiety and depression sometimes go hand and hand (she didn't say it this way but this is my take on something I read that she posted). I think this is so true.
Take care of yourself. Do relaxing things.
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Default Jun 20, 2019 at 07:56 AM
  #20
Sending love and hugs to all in pain
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