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Member
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: East Coast
Posts: 70
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#1
I'm really struggling at the moment. I see my therapist twice a week now. And seeing my psychiatrist next week. I really think that I need to switch one of my medications. I been drinking here and there. But I feel so worthless these days, so insignificant, like I don't really exist. The self hatred is really strong. I been self harming again. I feel like I cannot relate to anyone and that no one can relate to me. I believe I am beyond help and hope. I am too ****ed up. I feel very isolated, paranoid about others. Struggle with suicidal ideations. I don't know what to do anymore.
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Fuzzybear, guilloche, scapegoat0001
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,326
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#2
hugs
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Member
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: East Coast
Posts: 70
9 20 hugs
given |
#3
Thanks. When I feel this depressed there is almost nothing that can make me feel better. This is how I know that it is not circumstantial or situational. It feels more clinical. I do things just to pass the time and keep busy, but no matter what I am doing I feel depressed, anxious, worthless, and hopeless. Therapy is not helping but it gets me out of the house and lets me get things off my chest. And my medication is not working. When I do feel good and stable I can do anything and enjoy and appreciate what I am doing. But this is where I am at now. There is also substance abuse to escape but it is only temporary, sometimes I am fine with taking a break and temporarily escaping.
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Magnate
Member Since Oct 2018
Location: California
Posts: 2,025
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#4
Have you called either of your therapists, sweetheart?
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Threadtastic Postaholic
Member Since Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006
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#5
do you notice if you self harm more when drinking?
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Magnate
Member Since Jun 2014
Location: US
Posts: 2,734
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#6
*hugs* When is your appt with the psychiatrist? Hang in there. Hope things get better soon...
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