advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
WishfulThinker66
Magnate
 
WishfulThinker66's Avatar
WishfulThinker66 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jun 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,285
5 yr Member
117 hugs
given
Default Apr 17, 2019 at 02:11 PM
  #1
I should be happy right now. There is goodness in my life. I have reason to feel joy. Instead of looking forward to joyful things coming my way I feel a growing sense of sadness. I don't want to be depressed. The thought of being so only draws me closer.
WishfulThinker66 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
FearLess47, Fuzzybear, Thirty shades

advertisement
Mopey
Magnate
 
Mopey's Avatar
Mopey remove
 
Member Since: Oct 2018
Location: California
Posts: 2,025
5 yr Member
1,520 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 17, 2019 at 02:38 PM
  #2
I can't either. If things suddenly start going right I'm immediately aware of how ephemeral that state of things is, and my mind starts casting around for something to worry about, which it immediately finds.

Last edited by Mopey; Apr 17, 2019 at 03:03 PM..
Mopey is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Fuzzybear, Thirty shades
will19
Grand Magnate
 
will19's Avatar
will19 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Oct 2012
Posts: 3,612
10 yr Member
1,097 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 17, 2019 at 04:41 PM
  #3
Same here! I feel guilty when I have some kind of good feeling. I can bask in it for a while, but then I think, hey! something's wrong. This can't be! I'm not supposed to feel that joy.

It seems like I feel alive when I feel bad and/or have things coming up to dread. Right now in my life I have things coming up that I'm dreading. It puts me in the defensive. And then that makes me feel alive or normal. Weird isn't it?
will19 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Fuzzybear, Thirty shades
WishfulThinker66
Magnate
 
WishfulThinker66's Avatar
WishfulThinker66 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jun 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,285
5 yr Member
117 hugs
given
Default Apr 18, 2019 at 09:39 AM
  #4
I hear what you both are saying. I will go so far as to say that as I get more and more depressed I feel less and less deserving of the good things I should be happy about.
WishfulThinker66 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Fuzzybear, Thirty shades
Mopey
Magnate
 
Mopey's Avatar
Mopey remove
 
Member Since: Oct 2018
Location: California
Posts: 2,025
5 yr Member
1,520 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 18, 2019 at 12:53 PM
  #5
That is so true. The worse I feel, the less I feel I deserve anything good.
Mopey is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Thirty shades
Fuzzybear
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear has no updates.
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,301 (SuperPoster!)
20 yr Member
81.2k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 18, 2019 at 07:30 PM
  #6

__________________
Fuzzybear is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Mopey, Thirty shades
 
Thanks for this!
WishfulThinker66
FearLess47
Member
 
FearLess47's Avatar
FearLess47 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Apr 2019
Location: U.S.
Posts: 219
3 yr Member
267 hugs
given
Default Apr 18, 2019 at 08:31 PM
  #7
I can so relate! Treading water....even when it's shallow enough for me to stand.
FearLess47 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Mopey, Thirty shades
Thirty shades
Grand Magnate
 
Thirty shades's Avatar
Thirty shades Much love to all
 
Member Since: Jul 2018
Location: UK
Posts: 4,798 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
16.2k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 19, 2019 at 03:18 AM
  #8
I can emapthise.

Going out and faking joy is very hard and tiring.

I wonder if the sadness comes from knowing we are missing out of the feeling of joy.

Big hugs
Thirty shades is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
FearLess47
TishaBuv
Legendary
TishaBuv It’s mostly them, and somewhat me.
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 10,122 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,857 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 19, 2019 at 05:18 AM
  #9
With me, I can feel joy and take pleasure in what makes me feel happy, but I am fearful that something will happen to hurt me soon, because it too often does, causing sadness yet again. I wonder if my depressed reaction to things is a self sabotage deep down. Good thread. Hugs to all.

I think I deserve to feel joy...

__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!"
. About Me--T
TishaBuv is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
FearLess47
sarahsweets
Threadtastic Postaholic
 
sarahsweets's Avatar
sarahsweets has no updates.
 
Member Since: Dec 2018
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 6,006 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
192 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 19, 2019 at 07:07 AM
  #10
Sometimes that inability has to do with not feeling deserving or worthy of the joy. Could that ne a possibility for you?

__________________
"I carried a watermelon?"

President of the no F's given society.
sarahsweets is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
WishfulThinker66
WishfulThinker66
Magnate
 
WishfulThinker66's Avatar
WishfulThinker66 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jun 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,285
5 yr Member
117 hugs
given
Default Apr 19, 2019 at 08:16 AM
  #11
Quote:
Originally Posted by TishaBuv View Post
With me, I can feel joy and take pleasure in what makes me feel happy, but I am fearful that something will happen to hurt me soon, because it too often does, causing sadness yet again. I wonder if my depressed reaction to things is a self sabotage deep down. Good thread. Hugs to all.

I think I deserve to feel joy...
Self-sabotage... yet another thing we do. Guilty as charged.
WishfulThinker66 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
FearLess47, TishaBuv
TishaBuv
Legendary
TishaBuv It’s mostly them, and somewhat me.
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 10,122 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,857 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Apr 19, 2019 at 08:18 AM
  #12
Quote:
Originally Posted by WishfulThinker66 View Post
Self-sabotage... yet another thing we do. Guilty as charged.
Let’s be wary of it and try to not do it. We all deserve happiness!

__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!"
. About Me--T
TishaBuv is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
FearLess47
WishfulThinker66
Magnate
 
WishfulThinker66's Avatar
WishfulThinker66 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Jun 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 2,285
5 yr Member
117 hugs
given
Default Apr 19, 2019 at 08:20 AM
  #13
Quote:
Originally Posted by sarahsweets View Post
Sometimes that inability has to do with not feeling deserving or worthy of the joy. Could that ne a possibility for you?
Exactly. It comes down to the sagging sense of self-worth that I have. Right now there is a correlation between my increasing weight and decreasing self-esteem. I feel rather ugly right now and terribly concerned about what people think. I don't just think I am unworthy but I think others think I am unworthy. What then will they think of the good things that happen to me? I convince myself that they think I am undeserving too.
WishfulThinker66 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
FearLess47
 
Thanks for this!
sarahsweets
FearLess47
Member
 
FearLess47's Avatar
FearLess47 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Apr 2019
Location: U.S.
Posts: 219
3 yr Member
267 hugs
given
Default Apr 19, 2019 at 10:29 AM
  #14
Ugh. Le self sabotage. Comprendo.
FearLess47 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:45 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.