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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,331
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#1
I think this is cruel.
Feelings can’t always be “controlled” imho... And harshly invalidating them and berating them when they are brave enough to share their true feelings is not humane.. imho. I think it’s now a well accepted psychological idea that change is more likely to occur if there is acceptance and respect... This has happened to me many times, in real life, people invalidating my pain and my feelings. I didn’t cry when I broke a limb when I was little... I already had learnt the ?? Lesson ?? That feelings are to be shunned and to be ashamed of Does anyone else find being invalidated and blamed for having feelings isn’t helpful? Love and respect to all __________________ Last edited by Fuzzybear; Apr 24, 2019 at 12:59 PM.. |
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Crypts_Of_The_Mind, MickeyCheeky, sinking
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Crypts_Of_The_Mind, MickeyCheeky
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2015
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,025
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#2
Quote:
I still get super angry like that. And - telling me or otherwise implying or suggesting I cannot express or talk about my emotions or feelings is one thing that brings it out. I seriously almost think I need anger management these days - but I really would rather the anger than the "step on me please" feeling I had for do many years. So .. I agree, telling people to "stuff it" is not helpful. Telling them to analyze to make sure they are perceiving correctly and therefore reacting appropriately is helpful (in my opinion). __________________ Life is not measured by the amount of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away |
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Fuzzybear, MickeyCheeky
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Fuzzybear, MickeyCheeky
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,331
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.2k hugs
given |
#3
Thanks for sharing Crypts, this makes a lot of sense to me
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Crypts_Of_The_Mind, MickeyCheeky
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Crypts_Of_The_Mind, MickeyCheeky
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Nov 2015
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 3,025
8 2,609 hugs
given |
#4
You're welcome my friend ❤❤
__________________ Life is not measured by the amount of breaths you take, but by the moments that take your breath away |
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Fuzzybear, MickeyCheeky
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Fuzzybear, MickeyCheeky
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Legendary
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Italy
Posts: 11,817
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#5
I'm so sorry you're going through all of this, Fuzzybear! Yes, Crypts_Of_The_Mind has already wisely and wonderfully spoken and I completely agree with EVERYTHING that's she's said better than I ever could in years! Being invalidated for expressing your feelings and yourself IS NEVER GOOD and NEVER HELPFUL AT ALL! You're absolutely righ, Fuzzybear, when you say that feelings can't be controlled and that we have EVERY RIGHT to express them as much as you need it and want it! I'm so sorry you were blamed simply for expressing them and that they made you feel ashamed of yourself! No one should EVER be blamed simply for how he's feeling about ANYTHING at all or to be treated like this! You were a GREAT bear cub, Fuzzybear! You deserved MUCH, MUCH better that! I'm so sorry you were treated this HORRIBLY and I hope you'll be able to get the love and respect that you TRULY deserve and need and you'll feel loved and respected for who the VERY CARING, KIND, SPECIAL, SUPPORTIVE, WISE AND WONDERFUL PERSON that you TRULY ARE!! You'll certainly get that love from us, Fuzzybear, since we DO appreciate you for who you truly are! I PROMISE YOU THAT! You're a STRONG, WONDERFUL PERSON! PLEASE REMEMBER THAT! I'm so sorry you have to deal with all of this, Fuzzybear!
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Crypts_Of_The_Mind, Fuzzybear
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Crypts_Of_The_Mind, Fuzzybear
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,331
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.2k hugs
given |
#6
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MickeyCheeky
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MickeyCheeky
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