Ready to give up

There are worse fates than death. What if you mess up trying to kill yourself and all you do is end up paralyzed unable to do anything without the assistance of others. Things you have done on your own for as long as you can remember like going to the bathroom. You now have to have help. What if you just severely maim yourself and now when you walk around people always stare.

No matter how much I want to give up and quit this is always holding be back. I can't do anything right so why would this be any different? Maybe 1 day.....maybe....

Well, right this moment a very famous surfer champion by the name of Sunny Garcia is in the ICU of a hospital in Portland, after attempting to suicide in the past week. There has been no updates. The last I read he was breathing on his own...but not conscious. I think he tried to hang himself.

I can't imagine he has escaped without severe damage.


This guy had ups and downs in his life (you can read about him online) but he had some wildly successful times.

I can think of no worse fate than waking up severely compromised after a suicide attempt.

Put your mind to your recovery. Be strong. I know that Sunny Garcia was trying very hard to get better. Who knows what happened.

It's good you came on Psych Central to share your feelings. Thank you.

Keep on keeping on. And say a prayer for Sunny Garcia. He was like an angel when on a surfboard. Perfection in motion. So sad. So sad it breaks my heart.

Well first off my knowledge of surfers is very limited. It begins and ends with AC Slater lol

You really hammered home my point for me. He attended suicide and as of right now it looks like he failed. Now no one knows just yet what the full extent of his injuries will be. What if he never wakes up again? What if he does and has permanent brain damage? There is no true "fool proof" plan out there. There is always a margin of error. I am always praying that 1 day I will have the courage to ignore the "dangers" of possible failure and take that leap into the abyss.

Nothing in life is without risk. Some risks are higher than others, but there is always a risk of something going wrong.

Well, I don't know too much about surfers but in his videos he looks awesome. Only looked him up after the news. It puzzles (and somewhat fascinates) me why really successful and talented people commit suicide.


Why not pray to have the courage to live? Because as I see it that's the point. Suicide is risky. Living is risky. You are already in life so why not take more risks with life? (These are all things I say to myself.)


Finally, we aren't here on this earth that long. For some of us the journey is such a struggle. But if only we could find another way to express our pain besides trying to find a foolproof way to die.

I would recommend a book called "The Savage God" written by A. Alvarez. It's an old book on the subject of suicide...written in the 70's. In the last chapter the author talks about his own suicide attempt at age 33. Back then in the U.K. suicide was still a criminal offense! Alvarez is now 89 years old!

This subject interests me because I have suicidal ideation. Personally I think it is a waste of time dealing with suicidal thoughts and the most boring period of my entire life. It is the opposite of creative. But I intend to get out of this. Yes, sometimes it feels like navigating my way through a pitch dark cave. I can't see the light...but I imagine it.


Fighting is way better...then where Sunny Garcia is now. Funny thing is his mother nicknamed him Sunny as a child because he had such a cheerful outlook on life.
Whatever happened in later life Sunny couldn't stay positive.

But it can be done. Suicidal thoughts can be overcome using the power of the mind, and, talking and sharing and caring.

I am glad you are here. I think you want to live. I really do.

Humpty Dumpty

I also believe the mind has immense power, Dechan, for good or ill. It’s up to us to decide how to use it. 🌹