Being AS IS

Fuzzybear · Nov 18, 2019 at 10:48 AM

Thirty shades · Nov 19, 2019 at 06:43 AM

Fuzzybear · Nov 19, 2019 at 01:06 PM

We are enough just the way we are

Fuzzybear · Nov 24, 2019 at 12:25 PM

Much love to all who are as is

Thirty shades · Nov 24, 2019 at 03:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fuzzybear

Much love to all who are as is

Much love to you dear Fuzzybear

And much love to all who are AS IS

pliepla · Nov 25, 2019 at 03:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thirty shades

It is a hard thing to do LT

I wonder if I find it hard to accept myself
That this is the reason other people struggle to accept me

I think, if you find yourself hard to accept, you tend to interprete others' behaviour and attitude in that light. It's not hard for others to accept you, it's mostly hard for you to accept they do.

Of course, it is more complex: feeling unaccepted might - to some extent - prompt you to do certain things that could set off others. Then again, if they know you're struggling, they will probably show some degree of understanding.

Fuzzybear · Nov 25, 2019 at 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pliepla

I think, if you find yourself hard to accept, you tend to interprete others' behaviour and attitude in that light. It's not hard for others to accept you, it's mostly hard for you to accept they do.

Of course, it is more complex: feeling unaccepted might - to some extent - prompt you to do certain things that could set off others. Then again, if they know you're struggling, they will probably show some degree of understanding.

Thanks for the thoughtful post

Calla lily12 · Nov 25, 2019 at 08:45 PM

If a friend asked you if they were too hard on themselves, you would probably see it. You're just as important. You deserve all the good things that come your way.

Fuzzybear · Nov 25, 2019 at 10:44 PM

Fuzzybear · Nov 28, 2019 at 06:39 PM

Crypts_Of_The_Mind · Nov 29, 2019 at 02:09 AM

I believe we all need to "see who we are" but also be able to "decide what we want to change - or if we want to change". In this way, growth is possible. It seems to me that if you simply accept yourself "as is", growth stops and becomes "this is all I can be - it is who I am, like it or lump it!". When we see ourselves for who we are atm though, we should be able to say "I am a good person deserving of happiness" yet also be able to see clear enough to see the flaws without causing the emotions of "I am a horrible person, I need to be alone and suffer the rest of my life."

I hope that makes sense.

I guess what I am saying is - don't feel guilty for not accepting yourself "as is" - it shows you wish to continue growing. Work instead toward ridding yourself of all unneccessary guilts.

You are a good person.
You deserve happiness.
You deserve a good life.

Thirty shades · Nov 29, 2019 at 03:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Crypts_Of_The_Mind

I believe we all need to "see who we are" but also be able to "decide what we want to change - or if we want to change". In this way, growth is possible. It seems to me that if you simply accept yourself "as is", growth stops and becomes "this is all I can be - it is who I am, like it or lump it!". When we see ourselves for who we are atm though, we should be able to say "I am a good person deserving of happiness" yet also be able to see clear enough to see the flaws without causing the emotions of "I am a horrible person, I need to be alone and suffer the rest of my life."

I hope that makes sense.

I guess what I am saying is - don't feel guilty for not accepting yourself "as is" - it shows you wish to continue growing. Work instead toward ridding yourself of all unneccessary guilts.

You are a good person.
You deserve happiness.
You deserve a good life.

Thanks for posting. I do like to and try to grow.

I think I have the most trouble accepting myself when I am filled with panic. It takes over and prevents growth.

Rejecting the panic, makes it grow and become worse.

Not sure that I want to accept myself as a panicky person. I think I need to accept the panic is part of me for now. I am learning to grow by accepting this awful state is part of me. Maybe at some point it will leave me or at least become easier to manage...

Crypts_Of_The_Mind · Nov 29, 2019 at 04:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thirty shades

Thanks for posting. I do like to and try to grow.

I think I have the most trouble accepting myself when I am filled with panic. It takes over and prevents growth.

Rejecting the panic, makes it grow and become worse.

Not sure that I want to accept myself as a panicky person. I think I need to accept the panic is part of me for now. I am learning to grow by accepting this awful state is part of me. Maybe at some point it will leave me or at least become easier to manage...

This is actually what I was saying. Accept yourself- but also determine what you want to change about yourself n go about doing so. (In your example - panic attacks would be what you wanted to change- so you would set up a plan to do so whilst not making "expectations" (such as a date you expect it done by, or how good/bad you are doing)

Thirty shades · Nov 29, 2019 at 04:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Crypts_Of_The_Mind

This is actually what I was saying. Accept yourself- but also determine what you want to change about yourself n go about doing so. (In your example - panic attacks would be what you wanted to change- so you would set up a plan to do so whilst not making "expectations" (such as a date you expect it done by, or how good/bad you are doing)

I know that I am not the panic. I can be free from it...

Lately it has been mostly impossible to escape. I am trying to accept it for what it is, an emotional flashback.

Many things help but it always returns... I endeavour to keep trying....

Crypts_Of_The_Mind · Nov 29, 2019 at 07:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thirty shades

I know that I am not the panic. I can be free from it...

Lately it has been mostly impossible to escape. I am trying to accept it for what it is, an emotional flashback.

Many things help but it always returns... I endeavour to keep trying....

Sounds like you have a healthy acceptance and attitude to it. I have been dx'd with general anxiety for about 20yrs now. It is a rare occasion that I am "crippled" by it anymore (get completely wrapped up in the panic - physical and emotional as well). I had to learn not only what my triggers are but also how to recognize I am close to going into an anxiety attack to prevent it. After that I had to experiment to see what exactly worked for me and what does not. I say all this not to "toot my own horn", but rather to say - the climb may be steep and seem to have no end to it; but just bc it is not currently in view - doesn't mean the end is not there. Keep your heart and mind not just believing, but KNOWING you WILL be without the severe panics and be able to not only hide them but be able to lessen their affect on you, you nearly- if at all - feel it.

I say this to everyone bc I experienced the truth of it:

You ARE stronger than you think! (Just keep plowing ahead! ❤)

Thirty shades · Nov 30, 2019 at 03:53 AM

Thanks Crypt's, onwards and upwards....

Crypts_Of_The_Mind · Nov 30, 2019 at 05:16 AM

You're welcome ❤❤

Fuzzybear · Dec 01, 2019 at 10:37 AM

Fuzzybear · Jan 23, 2020 at 05:12 PM

Hugs and respect to all

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Fuzzybear Wisest Elder Ever Member Since Nov 2002 Location: Cave. Posts: 96,325 (SuperPoster!) 21 81.2k hugs given	Nov 18, 2019 at 10:48 AM #21 __________________
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Thirty shades Grand Magnate Member Since Jul 2018 Location: UK Posts: 4,799 (SuperPoster!) 5 16.2k hugs given	Nov 19, 2019 at 06:43 AM #22
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Fuzzybear Wisest Elder Ever Member Since Nov 2002 Location: Cave. Posts: 96,325 (SuperPoster!) 21 81.2k hugs given	Nov 19, 2019 at 01:06 PM #23 We are enough just the way we are __________________
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Fuzzybear Wisest Elder Ever Member Since Nov 2002 Location: Cave. Posts: 96,325 (SuperPoster!) 21 81.2k hugs given	Nov 24, 2019 at 12:25 PM #24 Much love to all who are as is __________________
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Calla lily12 Grand Member Member Since Jul 2018 Location: a place far away Posts: 830 5 979 hugs given	Nov 25, 2019 at 08:45 PM #28 If a friend asked you if they were too hard on themselves, you would probably see it. You're just as important. You deserve all the good things that come your way. __________________ Once you are real, you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always....
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Thirty shades Grand Magnate Member Since Jul 2018 Location: UK Posts: 4,799 (SuperPoster!) 5 16.2k hugs given	Nov 30, 2019 at 03:53 AM #36 Thanks Crypt's, onwards and upwards....
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Fuzzybear Wisest Elder Ever Member Since Nov 2002 Location: Cave. Posts: 96,325 (SuperPoster!) 21 81.2k hugs given	Jan 23, 2020 at 05:12 PM #39 Hugs and respect to all __________________
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