The rebirth of distrust...sadness within

I am opening my thoughts to the digital world. Herein lies what is in my thoughts. Be prepared for some sorrow. I am sorry for the pain, but I need to vent.

How can I learn to trust the world? Why do the people that mean the most to me lie to me? How can I allow a woman into my life to only find that all the things she told me became lies? She promised me forever and it had an expiration date. I became vulnerable to only have it thrown back at me. The despair is suffocating. Hope is being eclipsed by despair once again.

I am defeated today and feeling down. Is there any way I can trust again? I find myself helplessly grasping for the hope that once was within me. I used to have so much hope, but after this, it has all come to a screeching halt. So many people have lied to me in this world, how can I trust again?

My own mother gave birth to me and lied to me. She defeated me and made me the monster I am. The person that I was supposed to trust the most, annihilated my soul. I am incapable of love and have truly come to hate how I see this world. So many lies...How can I surface again? How can I trust again? How do I allow trust to manifest itself? This is disgusting and crushing me.

How do I teach my daughter to trust the world, when I am such a cynic? How do I give her the gift of hope, when it has eluded me for so long. Damn this cycle and the rebirth of the cynic within my soul. Damn the lies...

sarcgeo

We all seek answers to your questions. You are not alone.

It works the same for women choosing the wrong men. We are useless at choosing a partner.

Parents

Love your daughter, teach her how to love the good ones

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. I wish I had some sage advice to offer you. But I'm a bit short on hope myself. Fortunately for me (or unfortunately depending on how you look at it) I'm old enough that it doesn't make much difference anymore. However, since hope is something you still "hope" to find... here are links to 8 articles, from PC's archives, on the subject of hope:

Does Hope Really Make a Difference? Scientific Findings | Healing Together for Couples

How We Lose Hope and How to Get it Back

3 Ways to Cultivate Hope

9 Types of Hopelessness and How to Overcome Them

The 7 Kinds of Hope

https://psychcentral.com/blog/the-ps...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/blog/a-real...dium=popular17

https://psychcentral.com/blog/findin...dium=popular17