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New Member
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Usa
Posts: 3
4 |
Sep 16, 2019 at 09:16 PM
#1
. Tomorrow is my 31st birthday. For the last 20 years I have told myself that this is the year I'm going to change and it never happens.
I have fantastic wants and needs and goals to meet and am thrilled to begin working on them but cannot ever start. I have a bookshelf full of hundreds of self help books but haven't read a single one. I have had amazing opportunities to start excellent jobs and every single time I find an excuse not to. If I already have the job I go out of my way to find an excuse to quit. It is a constant struggle to force myself to brush my teeth once a day, have a decent meal, or go to bed at a reasonable hour. I would rather eat garbage (that I dont even like) and immerse myself in porn and YouTube. It is like anything that will better myself is simply put on hold. My brain completely blocks it out and begins finding an excuse or something else to do. I am constantly under the mindset that the grass is always greener and if my situation just had this in it than my life would be better like so and so. I have been to therapy and was on an ssri for over a year and stopped because the psych said that she couldn't help me anymore. The ssri just made me not care about anything at all and I was just floating through life so I stopped. I want more than anything to be normal. To be able to provide for my family and be an adult. I feel like such a child. I came here to try and find out what the heck is wrong with me and why I am like this. If anyone has any ideas I am all ears. Thank you for reading this. I wish everyone well. |
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 Fuzzybear, Sunflower123, unaluna
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 Skeezyks
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Disreputable Old Troll
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
Posts: 32,762
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Sep 17, 2019 at 01:42 PM
#2
I'm sorry you are having such a difficult time. Hopefully coming here to PC can be of some comfort & support.
__________________ "I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
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New Member
Member Since Sep 2019
Location: Usa
Posts: 3
4 |
Sep 17, 2019 at 07:48 PM
#3
Quote:
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| Sunflower123
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Jul 2018
Location: UK
Posts: 4,799
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Sep 18, 2019 at 02:35 AM
#4
Hi Mobywhale
 I am having trouble reading with my brain just now, so apologies for not taking in your post. Recently I have been struggling with sitting in limbo down in my hole. Ongoing stress stopping me from picking myself up. This week I have forced myself with enormous difficulty to do a few positive things. It has helped, made me feel a little more worthwhile again. I wish you well too
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Legendary
Member Since Feb 2009
Posts: 10,022
15 15.2k hugs
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Sep 18, 2019 at 07:29 AM
#5
Hello & Welcome, Mobywhale.
Quote:
__________________ My dog  mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.
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| Fuzzybear
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,331
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Sep 19, 2019 at 01:58 PM
#6
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.
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