[strivingforhappy96]

I'm not doing too well.

[will19]

It was very slow at work today and it was not a feel good kind of day. In the morning I was on the phone for quite a while asking questions about my appointment coming up on Thursday. Lots of "hold" time on the phone. I got confused and it took a while for things to make sense.

Also I got upset with the cleaning lady at work because I was having a good talk with someone and then she interrupted me with some minor detail. It wasn't just the interruption that got to me. It was the way she did it. She came on very bossy and I felt embarrassed. She doesn't speak English and it seems like she's not familiar on proper ways to act.

I worked out after work.

[Buffy01]

I feel really down today.

Very depressed and tired and angry. I’ll have to speak with management about something if I find myself limited.

[Rose76]

My caregiving efforts are causing me some major pains and aches. I'll take physical pain over depression any day. For some unknown reason, I haven't been depressed in a good little while. Maybe it's because I'm quite busy getting stuff done. And I do get the stuff done . . . and done to a pretty high standard.

But my right upper arm and left heel are killing me. At times my back is painful. The right arm really worries me. It hurts just to lift that arm. So the solution would be to use that arm a lot less. Figuring out how I'm going to arrange that is the dilemma.

[Breaking Dawn]

Dear @Rose76, You are so wonderful for him, because you love him. Thank you for posting & sharing. My prayers are with you, as I'm sure many others are. God bless you!

[will19]

It turned out that the appointment I had for Thursday has been postponed, so I will be going to work instead of taking the day off. The appointment was postponed because I need to have an MRI done before the consultation. So I'm looking into getting an MRI done and hopefully soon. Although I feel great physically but not so emotionally.

Went for a bike ride after work. It's nice being able to do that now.

[giddykitty]

Had a pretty good day so feeling good. A little worried it won't last though, but hopeful for some restful sleep and some sweet dreams!

[leomama]

Feeling quite down today .

[3rd rock]

I'm pretty tired today. I went to have bloodwork done this morning, which meant no coffee or breakfast until I got home at around 10. I'll find out soon if I have a thyroid problem that causes me to be exhausted all the time. If so, my psychiatrist will prescribe medication for that. If not, he'll prescribe amphetamines.

I haven’t been able to sleep. Lots on my mind.

[giddykitty]

Well, I overslept and was still tired but probably needed it because I guess I didn't sleep until after 2:30am...that's kinda late. And fingernail picking was keeping me up. Sigh! and I think I had some unpleasant dreams, but I must be repressing them because I only get glimpses and negative feelings. :/ Going to try to make the most of today though!

wanted to see the kitties again today and watch Lucifer. Looks like I'm not going to get time. :/

This might not make a lot of sense because I'm copying and pasting different thoughts throughout the day and distracted as I compile all this. oops!

[BlueCat214]

I'm feeling really trapped. I've been dealing with the same problems for years. I don't know how to keep going. Also having sleep issues. Very stressful. I'm not sure what step to take next. I don't see a way forward.

[will19]

I went to work today. I was going to have the day off as of yesterday. Yesterday I had told a few people at work that I was going to be off for Thursday. They were shocked to see me today. I decided to move a day off to another time when I can make the medical appointments.

It was not busy with work today. However there were some phone calls to make to the doctor's offices and emailing them also. It was very draining. But now I feel like I have finally made some progress to take action. At least there's now a clear path to go for action now. I hope & pray that the results will be OK as I am very anxious.

[leomama]

Originally Posted by BlueCat214

I'm feeling really trapped. I've been dealing with the same problems for years. I don't know how to keep going. Also having sleep issues. Very stressful. I'm not sure what step to take next. I don't see a way forward.

That’s a rough spot to be in. What kind of medication or supplementation are you taking?

[leomama]

Originally Posted by the walls

I haven’t been able to sleep. Lots on my mind.

How’s your caffeine intake?

[Mountaindewed]

I can’t tell if I’m so depressed that I don’t care or if I’m doing ok so I’m handling disappointment better....

I embarrass myself every day. Argh. Maybe this relates to the amount of social anxiety I have rather than how I actually am. Idk.

I’m trying to concentrate on studying something. But I cannot!

Life is full of pitfalls and it seems like some of them are unavoidable if you want to keep moving forward. I hope I’m playing my cards right. I feel kind of sad and depressed right now. I think I might be lonely.

I don’t have a single connection here. I don’t know how to make them. I guess something is missing. I don’t understand what the point of socializing is. Like, why would I want to go to a bar and have a trivia night or just drink with people? What is the point? It sounds so depressing.

[3rd rock]

I'm all set to return to work. My first shift next week will be Tuesday. I'm so nervous I could freak out at any moment. I've got to keep drinking coffee. Part of me thinks they're going to just fire me instantaneously for being off for almost 10 months, but the other part of me knows that's stupid. The union rep is coming by on Wednesday, which I'll be working as well, so I can see him for the first time since I last worked. I feel like I'm in an intense state of fear, like survival mode when everything else but adrenaline shuts down or something. It'll be fine.

[will19]

Today wasn't a feel good kind of day. I've noticed that there are certain people that give me the silent treatment when I'm near them. I don't know what I could have done to hurt or offend them in any way. I hardly talk to those people.

One good thing is that I finally lined up times for my medical appointments. I thought that it would never happen. That's the only decent thing that happened all day.

Tonight my friend had called saying that he can't talk tonight and had to go to bed early. I happened to be out when he called. He didn't say why he's going to bed early.