Fuzzybear

What do you think of this cliché? The parental units almost never spoke to me UNLESS in clichés

''if you can't beat them, join them''

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Thirty shades

Grrrrrrrr... Yes cliches, my MU had loads. I feel for you having words used as weapons against you

If you can't beat them, join them?
Would I want to beat them? I am happy being equal to another person....
The phase is used when I am sure I would not want to join them....
I would be happy if they wanted to be equal also.....

Hugs and respect

TheSadGirl

I don't like that saying, except perhaps in a joking context. It is essentially saying you should go with the crowd and I completely disagree. The world is beautiful because we are all different and especially because people go against the grain. Every great invention came from a mind that was once considered mad.

Skeezyks

My father loved sayings... many of them derogatory. He didn't necessarily direct them at me (or anyone else) directly. But you pretty-much always got the idea he had you in mind. Here's just one "great" example (I don't know where he got this from):

"If you were as low in stature as you are in character, you could walk under a snake's belly with a stove-pipe hat on!"

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Speak only if you can improve upon the silence.

Fuzzybear

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unaluna

Its so defeatist. Its so, shut up, stop being you and stop bothering me with your stupid problems. Can you tell ive heard it before in the given context?

luvyrself

My mentor tried to teach me a great phrase to neutralize situations with my verbally abusive, gaslighting , tho highly successful 43 yr old son who controls access to my grandkids despite the fact that I was an elem teacher.
I try to appreciate the humor in this, but you have to say it with a straight face,
“Thank you for your input” LOL. lOL. See, you can throw the cliches right back at them!!!!

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Bipolar 2
mixed states & rapid cycling under stress
tegretol 400 mg
wellbutrin 75 mg, cut in half or higher dose as needed
10 mg non THC gummy,solid mfr,as needed for anxiety
Regular aerobic exercise

TishaBuv

I was told that, too.

What first comes to mind is that it might have been suggested to me when I was bullied and not accepted with the popular girls in elementary school.

I didn’t take it as a negative thing, and thought it was said with good intentions. I think it is meant to encourage you to be manipulative. Like “keep your friends close and your enemies closer”. If they didn’t like me, maybe I could get them to by becoming their follower and win them over.

It didn’t work, though. Those girls just didn’t like me and continued to bully.

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"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!"
. About Me--T

luvyrself

I understand what you’re saying but she suggested that phrase as one to avoid further exacerbating the situation, like not waving a red cape in front of a bullWow, it’s SO hard to strike the right balance for oneself in complicated situations like hosting a holiday dinner with multi generations that have a really touchy history. I keep things as simple as I can, but things seem to get more challenging as we get older and I want to interact with my grandkids but am at a loss as how to deal w my overextended grumpy son who is uber controlling. I talked to a online therapist s office about taking us but I am in one state and he lives in another. Therapy would be a big deal and I already have my hands full in my own life. It’s the dilemma of where to draw your boundaries- always complicated.

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Bipolar 2
mixed states & rapid cycling under stress
tegretol 400 mg
wellbutrin 75 mg, cut in half or higher dose as needed
10 mg non THC gummy,solid mfr,as needed for anxiety
Regular aerobic exercise

Fuzzybear

I think ''thank you for your input'' can be a fitting response to a mean or deliberately useless statement. It gives zero emotional response which is what a bully wants.. they feed on emotion.

I think Tishabuv was replying re the cliché a parental unit had said to me (one of many... most of the others were more negative...)

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