i don’t know what to do

I don’t really have anyone else to talk to go to for advice so i’m coming here. I’ve been having a really hard time and I don’t know what to do. I was going to therapy for a while but I was so uncomfortable with my therapist that I started refusing to go. Which is completely my fault. My parents said I seem better so they just stopped making me go. I’m not better and i’m so tired of pretending I am. I need to tell someone because i’m scared i’m going to do something I regret. I’m so scared to tell them because when they found about my self injury my dad got mad because he said I have no reason to feel like this. These last two years I went through some pretty traumatic stuff but I haven’t opened up to anyone about it because i’m so scared. I just want to feel okay again and I don’t know what to do.

Hi winchestler. Welcome to Psych Central. I am sorry that you are scared to talk to people. Maybe you need a therapist or support group that specializes in self harm.

Here is an article that may be of interest Self-Harm: The Myths & the Facts | Embracing Balance

Honestly I don't know what the answer is here. But I think it may (perhaps) be to talk to your parents & get back into some sort of therapy. You wrote you were so uncomfortable with your therapist you refused to go. Maybe that just was not the right therapist for you? It can take a while to find a therapist you feel comfortable with. Not every therapist works well with every client. Maybe try a different therapist... or a different type of therapy?

You wrote you went through some pretty traumatic stuff but you haven't opened up to anyone & you're scared you might do something you'll regret. Please don't! What I can tell you is that I'm an old person now. But many years ago I also experienced some traumatic stuff. And I never said anything about it to my parents. (It's a long story & I'll spare you the details.) But what happened to me has, to some extent, followed me down through the decades even to this day.

Please don't do that to yourself. Reach out in real life, in whatever way you feel you can, for the help you need. If you're in school, & you don't feel you can talk to your parents (I never could have), perhaps consider talking to a school counselor or a trusted teacher, if there is one. Posting here on PC can certainly be helpful too. But ultimately what you are really going to need, I would presume, is help & support in real life. I hope that, in some way, you will be able to find it.

Do talk to someone you trust. If you can talk to your parents, or one of them, do. Be honest, let them know you are scared and you need help. This is important, keeping it to yourself is potentially dangerous and over time so self-defeating. The sooner you can start to work on positive skills the better, the more open you can be, the more opportunities you have. I am getting old now, and wish I had spoken to someone when I was young, but I don't know that I could have even admitted to my own fear and need, you have courage. Don't be afraid to use it.

I agree with the above. Very important you find someone to talk to about the traumatic stuff that happened in the past. If you don't find someone at first, please keep trying to find someone else you are comfortable with. You are worth saving.

It is good that you reached out here to us. I do want to just say that I suspect the primary emotion your parents are both feeling--regardless of how it may come out--is fear. They are your parents. You are suffering. That frightens all parents who have a soul. So, you just might try to bear that i mind. If you are seeing anger, what is underneath that is likely a healthy dose of fear.

I also think that normal parents would be fearful and might express that as anger. Sadly (for me) I did not have normal parents with a soul.