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guy1111
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Default Mar 20, 2020 at 09:50 PM
  #1
I've just been so depressed recently and I have always thought that "survivor" is such an over-used word. I think it should be reserved for people of large tragedies that were truly outside of their immediate world, like terrorist attacks or kidnappings. I don't think it should be a lable for someone in an abusive relationship or even bad childhood.

Now, I'm wondering if I call myself a survivor of abusive people in my past and accept my depression as a result, am I just enabling myself to act depressed? What is the benefit of the "survivor" label?
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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 03:11 AM
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Yeah, interesting question. I personally don't really like these terms--survivor, consumer. Probably some others. I guess I usually just refer to myself as a patient, as that is how I view myself.

I am very sorry you are struggling at the moment. I really don't believe it is possible to "enable" oneself into a legit depression. It's a biological, neurologic/psychiatric disease. At least, that is now I have always seen it.

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 06:23 AM
  #3
Anyone that makes it through something that likely would have killed them is a survivor. If you’ve been chronically depressed, and you’re still here, then you are surviving it. . Well wishes to be strong and heal for you.

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 07:27 AM
  #4
I see myself as an overcomer (Don't like the term survivor)
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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 09:52 AM
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Originally Posted by bpcyclist View Post
Yeah, interesting question. I personally don't really like these terms--survivor, consumer. Probably some others. I guess I usually just refer to myself as a patient, as that is how I view myself.

I am very sorry you are struggling at the moment. I really don't believe it is possible to "enable" oneself into a legit depression. It's a biological, neurologic/psychiatric disease. At least, that is now I have always seen it.
Very good points. No, we are not consumers, we are citizens thank you very much. I think I am afraid to admit that I have depression as a disease because I don't think I fit my definition of depression. Yet all my therapists and even some of my friends say I am depressed. I think I view myself as "better than that". I don't want to admit I have that problem because I view depression as something ugly. My ex-wife has depression and looking at her from my perspective, she was very difficult to deal with. She was such a drag when she was depressed. Maybe I am afraid that I might be viewed that way by others?

Anyways, thanks for the reply!
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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 09:53 AM
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Originally Posted by nicoleflynn View Post
I see myself as an overcomer (Don't like the term survivor)
I like that! Thanks!
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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 12:35 PM
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Very good points. No, we are not consumers, we are citizens thank you very much. I think I am afraid to admit that I have depression as a disease because I don't think I fit my definition of depression. Yet all my therapists and even some of my friends say I am depressed. I think I view myself as "better than that". I don't want to admit I have that problem because I view depression as something ugly. My ex-wife has depression and looking at her from my perspective, she was very difficult to deal with. She was such a drag when she was depressed. Maybe I am afraid that I might be viewed that way by others?

Anyways, thanks for the reply!
Huh, interesting. I wonder if you would find yourself so harshly judging yourself if it were another disease, like diabetes or coronary artery disease or cancer. Just wondering about all that, I guess. Just my opinion, but again, I do not believe it is possible to "give oneself" a major depessieve episode. YMMV, of course.

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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 02:16 PM
  #8
Bad childhood. it does take something to survive that without turning into ?

Probably helpful..
Not if it involves certain things though

I’m not into judging and labelling. It bores me. Too many “professionals” in this forest irl seem to possess that as their only “gift”


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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 05:33 PM
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Huh, interesting. I wonder if you would find yourself so harshly judging yourself if it were another disease, like diabetes or coronary artery disease or cancer. Just wondering about all that, I guess. Just my opinion, but again, I do not believe it is possible to "give oneself" a major depessieve episode. YMMV, of course.
You're right. I have heart disease and I am not necessarily ashamed of it or think it is ugly. I think I have alot of biases. I'm not trying to be disrespectful to anyone, I'm just being brutally honest with myself. I am not proud of my views of depression. I am just admitting it so I can get help. I don't like feeling this way and I am hurting myself and others around me by ignoring the problem.

You are probably right about giving myself a depressive episode. But this is the argument I give my therapist. I tell them that I don't feel this "cloud over my head for no reason" feeling. It's just that alot of sad things have happened to me and alot of my present life as well is very painful. So I cry.
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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 05:57 PM
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Default Mar 21, 2020 at 06:17 PM
  #11
To me the term "survivor" means I have come through experiences that should break or kill a normal person, and that I can do it again if needed. I survived. If you are still here against all odds it is a positive thing.

Survivor means we have prevailed over some horrible things.
I'm a survivor, aren't you?

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Thumbs up Mar 25, 2020 at 04:44 AM
  #12
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Originally Posted by guy1111 View Post

Now, I'm wondering if I call myself a survivor of abusive people in my past and accept my depression as a result, am I just enabling myself to act depressed? What is the benefit of the "survivor" label?

To be a surviver means that you have been able to fight aganst what they once did to you. Such fight is very difficult. It's an honor to be called "survivor". It's an invisible "mark" that you have done work that not eveybody are able to do (the person in the street that never was abused).


Depression is a diagnose. It is not a shame to have a diagnose. Survivor is not a diagnose, but a recognition by oneself that one has done an amount for work to overcome former hurts. One can can be depressed and be a survivor at the same time.

I f you feel that there is still a lot of work to do with your depression before you have overcome the past well enough to live a somewhat good life, may be you can call yourself a depressed person still in work to become a survivor.

My very best wishes for you!
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