[Deilla]

I have a doctor's appointment today. I feel fine about it. I will try to make the best of my day.

[T4bbyCat]

Did the move (or rather the movers did). As usual, the tail end seems like whack-a-mole. As soon as you empty out the last cupboard, you realize the nasty shower curtain needs to be thrown out, etc., etc.

[will19]

Today is the last "real" day of my time off from work. I have a plan for this morning. There's a library I want to go to where I can park and walk around some attractions for about an hour. After that I'll have lunch and do laundry. Very warm outside today, which is unseasonable.

I talked to my friend last night and he has someone to visit him for part of the day. For some reason I don't like to visit my friend because I don't feel comfortable at his house. I couldn't sleep last night because I got thinking 'how is he able to get people to come and visit him' when it's like pulling teeth to make that happen for me.

I feel really alone in life. A friend made other plans, again, this is about as much as I want to put into this new "friendship" because a real friend shouldn't always cancel last minute. I'm afraid for my future, and depressed about my dad being so unwell.

[Deilla]

My doctor's visit went well. I got a knee injection. Already my knee is much better. Next week I do the other knee. I feel good. I feel hopeful for a good day.

[Breaking Dawn]

Yesterday I had to fulfill a goal involving a number of obstacles & a lot of stress, & I succeeded. I hope it strengthened me, because I need to fulfill another goal, hopefully today, that I'm afraid is also going to be stressful.

[Mountaindewed]

I just have the same Covid and election fatigue that every American has right now. Nothing special. I had some SI last night but I think it was a med reaction.

But my therapist told me on Thursday she doesn’t have time for my emails anymore and everything we do from now on is gonna be in session. Which I guess has kinda been making me feel bad all day. I know it’s not personal and she’s feeling the same things everyone else is plus she’s a therapist so it’s probably extra hard for her. But it’s still tough to hear that. And I don’t even know if I can really trust her or not with Pdoc on her speed dial. It’s so confusing right now.

[will19]

Today I just did cleaned and that's it. It was nice not having to do laundry and shopping today along with the cleaning as always. I took a three hour bike ride after lunch, which I rarely do on Saturdays. For some reason I feel alright at this time on a late Saturday afternoon than before. I tend to get very down by late Saturday afternoons.

I got back from my bike ride and the voice mail was flashing one message for me. It turned out it was just one of those scam calls, but no message was left. I hate that. Because I was hoping that it was from someone I knew.

Very alone. I'm here with just my dad. I find it so hard because I don't know how to comfort him anymore, hes really struggling to breathe. His injdlers aren't helping. He keeps talking about dying soon. My son is here during the week but I feel especially alone tonight because I'm trying to caregive but what can I do
I tear up
I kept thinking he'll be fine for months yet. I just wish I had a close friend who was supportive.

[Deilla]

I had a tough time with therapy yesterday. That ruined my day. I'm still not doing all that well. Maybe I'll feel better in the morning.

[jrae]

not sure i can take this much longer. the mind is sooooooo defeated. can't remember when i last saw 'the light at the end of the tunnel' ....... [been buried for WAY too long]

[Breaking Dawn]

Roll call! Here.

[will19]

I woke up earlier than I wanted or needed to. This new time change has thrown me off. HAVE YOU ALL CHANGED YOUR CLOCKS YET? I woke up feeling depressed but felt better after breakfast and coffee. It's back to work tomorrow after having a whole week off. I've always hated to go back to work after having time off. It's because, when I get back to the office, things are not what they were like when I was last there.

Some plans for today. I'm going to make a batch of spaghetti sauce and go over some month end finances. And take a bike ride after lunch. My sister will probably call. I hope it goes well. There's a slight possibility that my long-estranged brother might call today. Not a sure bet.

[Mountaindewed]

I felt like I hit a turning point in my depression this morning. But by noon I was feeling badly again. Now I’m just lying in bed existing.

[will19]

It was a pretty good day today. My sister called and we had a good talk. There are times that it goes very well and sometimes not. Took a longer bike ride today.

It's back to work tomorrow. I'm not looking forward to it. In the past I did when I was away for a while, but I don't love my job as much anymore. It had changed and not for better.

[puzzclar]

Why do I have to go up and down so freaking much!!!! It's a down night. I did nothing today, that was active. Just on the computer, did some crafts, and that was it. I need to get out of my comfort zone. I'm scared and going down fast. I sure hope sleep helps.

[Breaking Dawn]

Taking it easy.

[Mountaindewed]

I told my therapist I went off my antidepressant and that’s why I was having SI. Not sure what she’ll say to that. She wants to do the session even though I’m upset. Said it would be good to work through things. I said I’m not sure. This current event fatigue is really getting to me. I’ve only been out of bed for about 3 hours in the past 36 hours.

[will19]

Well, it was back to work for me today after having a week off. It went very well. I was busy throughout the whole day, which was nice. The time went by so fast. I did a little bit of shopping after work at one of those "outlet" stores. The buys were not that great.

For the first time in a good while, I didn't do any kind of workout. I can't ride my bike after work from now on until around next March because of the early sunsets. I'll miss it.

[Deilla]

I feel restless. I looked into starting a few new projects but couldn't settle on anything. I may just go back to bed.