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Old 09-14-2020, 07:45 PM   #1
2daffodils
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Default How many?

How much of our lives are on repeat. How many of our thoughts are ingrained like running through a line of dirt like a dog on a chain.
. the path just gets deeper and how do we stop it? The black dog of depression.
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Old 09-15-2020, 08:58 AM   #2
raging vortex
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Default Re: How many?

I feel like, most days, I am stuck in the movie groundhog day

litirally. same beginning, same end, same worthless **** in the middle

my life is so plain and boring I can even guess what is happening (or going to happen) from moment to moment
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Old 09-15-2020, 09:00 AM   #3
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Default Re: How many?

usually, the highlights of my day are something really stupid and not even real highlights.

I ate an extra cookie at snacktime. I drank 3 glasses of water, not 2, I coughed at 12 PM and I never cough at 12 PM.. that kind of thing
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Old 09-15-2020, 11:00 AM   #4
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Default Re: How many?

Depression is cyclical, and it's hard to shake. But there are periods of relief, and periods of light.

Sometimes it can be good to look back and reflect on the times that were hard. How many times did we experience such severe pain and heartache that we thought we wouldn't survive? Or that we didn't want to? But we have survived, and the scars provide how strong we are.

Breaking out of depression is hard. For me, it starts with little things. One thing each day to fill competent and confident. Emptying the litter box. Walking the garbage to the dumpster. Taking a shower. Little by little I gain momentum. I also try to remind myself to reach out and stay engaged with treatment and with friends.

Some days the depression wins. But so far I've been able to claw my way back to the light. I hope you find the strength and hope to do the same. <3
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Old 09-15-2020, 05:52 PM   #5
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Default Re: How many?

Quote:
Originally Posted by raging vortex View Post
usually, the highlights of my day are something really stupid and not even real highlights.

I ate an extra cookie at snacktime. I drank 3 glasses of water, not 2, I coughed at 12 PM and I never cough at 12 PM.. that kind of thing
Thank you, and it seems stupid to you but whatever we can do to get through our days isn't stupid in my opinion.. I.hope you get some sleep tonight and your pain doesn't keep you awake. I've been on the forum long enough to know your struggles. Pain is a big problem and sleep for me too. I care, for what its worth. I hope better days are ahead for you!
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