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Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,226
9 41 hugs
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#1
For anything or anyone.
I mean I do have nothing going for me when it comes to value. I mean I could look at myself for just me. I think I am an okay person. Then again at times I am a bad person. I've been trying to improve my value. Mainly through working out and trying to become better looking physically. Being a valuable person to society. I mean that is how people feel good is being valued by someone else. When you have a job, that is society's way of saying. You have worth. You are a valuable person. Improved self-esteem and not to mention actual income. "You shouldn't measure someone by their income!" Well we all do it whether we like to or not. We feel a bit- can't think of the word uhhh. I guess in awe. Awe would be a good word I guess. A bit in awe of those with large incomes. Or positions that show they have great value. People get jealous of that and try to find anyway to downsize their value when they feel their value is at threat. "Just because you have a large income doesn't mean you are more valuable than me. I have value in myself as a person!" I haven't tried to get a job or anything. I might go to school for something. I don't know. The last few years have been an abyss for me. Taking some meds for the last few months. Though I don't know if I will ever be able to function and pursue life. Sad. Without value. I have no worth. I'm subhuman. I can't have friends. I can't have love. I'll die alone. I'll probably outlive all of my siblings. I'll die alone in some homeless shelter. Homeless people will steal stuff off my corpse and no one will notice me until I start to stink and stick to the floor and my face is falling apart. Ribcage caving in. Perhaps a bit too descriptive but you get my point. People without value may as well be a rock or a wall or a tree stump. |
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bluekoi, Fuzzybear
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Magnate
Member Since Apr 2013
Posts: 2,188
10 5,526 hugs
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#2
Hi Steiner,
I feel you and in the past sometimes I thought like you. But then I met some people at the U.S. and they produced a big change in me. I understood that I am valuable no matter what and I should not allow other people defining me. You are alive, Steiner, get mad, get angry. You have the right to pursue happiness. It took some time to fully understand that, but I did and I am eternally grateful to those Americans who helped in my awareness. I had periods of depression after that experience, but anyway, I always think I have the right to pursue happiness regardless my gender, age, race, health status, etc. I am not the strongest or the claverest person in this world but I could achieve it. It is not the solution to all our problems but it helps , at least in my experience. Maybe this is not useful for you, but I wanted to share it just in case. I am sending you a big hug __________________ Clara Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out. Vaclav Havel |
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Wisest Elder Ever
Member Since Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,325
(SuperPoster!)
21 81.2k hugs
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#3
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Member
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: Indiana
Posts: 113
9 |
#4
Quote:
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Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,226
9 41 hugs
given |
#5
Quote:
My life has no value. It's empty and full of disappointment. I have no value because the people who birthed me like me but that is what many would say is an empty life because most would say their parents should love them. I guess I am sad because I don't consider it love because some don't even have that. I feel if my parents didn't care for me they would view their own value as decreasing. They would see themselves as bad parents and bad parents are seen as bad people. They would feel their value and worth in life decrease, not to anyone else but to themselves. No one else likes me and those that do are sort of forced because they are stuck with me. I mess up and people get hurt when I try. I'm seen as too weird or eccentric to be likable or brefriended/loved and lately I just don't like to go out at all. I'm working on myself towards a pointless goal I feel. When I finally reach my goal what then? Will people finally start to like me but only because of shallow reasons. They never would have liked me before though I guess everything in life is like that. I am like that towards others so it doesn't surprise me if others are like that towards me. Frankly I feel things are too complicated for me. I'm too simple really. I get confused easily and find it hard to do things that others know how to do. I can't get myself to do things I want to do. I'm not motivated and things are too complicated for me to do without any motivation. No one to sit there and guide me and hold my hand. I'd really like if someone would hold my hand but life isn't like that I suppose. I am alone. We go through life trying to attain value and self-worth through any means possible. I just feel like nothing I can do will give me any value/self-worth. I'll have this bothersome low self-esteem that gets in the way of everything. There is no reason for me to NOT have low self-esteem because I have no value as a person besides like my body or something. I don't mean prostitution I mean selling my organs. Though I always check no to donating because I'm paranoid they will try to kill me off early so they can get the goods. |
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Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2014
Location: Texas
Posts: 1,226
9 41 hugs
given |
#6
Sorry that you feel the same.
Thank you for copy pasting hearts. It doesn't show that you care but more like you're just trying to boost your post count to give yourself some value. Which is okay because it's something and we all should have, something that gives us value in life. I just wish I had something besides playing video games sometimes and measuring my penis when I am bored and trying to feel better that it isn't a micropenis. Which I guess is something else I should mention(but probably really shouldn't in this thread but I don't care) that micropenises don't get any love in the world. I feel bad for anyone with a micropenis because even when they have one they will literally get laughed at instead of getting empathy for it. They'll have a hard time pleasuring a woman and they will always seem to have an inferiority complex. Love you Fuzzybear. You are an important part of the forum.(probably doesn't make up for what I just typed but bare with me, I'm feeling like an asshole atm. sorry.) Though honestly even if it's just little hearts I think it's nice of you to post them because it makes those who post something and get no response, but that, not feel so bad. They will feel like, "well at least someone read it ." At least I think you read these posts. Do you read these posts? I really hope you do or else I will feel stupid writing all this. (I probably will feel bad about it later either way.) Last edited by Steiner of Thule; Dec 16, 2014 at 12:25 AM.. |
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bluekoi
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Magnate
Member Since Apr 2013
Posts: 2,188
10 5,526 hugs
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#7
You are right. When we are children we learn self-worth from our parents, and other significant people. Then we internalize that learning and at certain point in life our self value should get independent from any external influence. However, for some people it is never like that and they depend on others to value themselves, so you are right again.
I apologize because I was not supportive in my previous entry. But I would like you to know that this strong feeling you have now will improve. I am sending you a hug __________________ Clara Hope is definitely not the same thing as optimism. It is not the conviction that something will turn out well, but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out. Vaclav Havel |
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New Member
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: North Dakota
Posts: 6
9 |
#8
I feel the some of the same things.... Shame guilt humiliation. But please remember that you did not create the problem you did not chose it nor can you control it.
Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk Last edited by Christina86; Mar 08, 2015 at 12:11 AM.. |
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New Member
Member Since Feb 2015
Location: North Dakota
Posts: 6
9 |
#9
I’d like to ask you a question. What (or from where) does your sufficiency come from?
Sometimes we are looking in the wrong place. Have you tried a church? |
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