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Grand Member
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: \"die bunte Kuh\"
Posts: 973
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Feb 28, 2006 at 11:12 AM
#1
Please help…such bad flashbacks of a murder ..feeling overwhelmed..system is trying to compensate..dont want to call my T..please what can I do..ground techniques aren’t helping I am sliding into it..Alters are talking..telling me “for Jesus Christ get a grip”..”weakling”..Help us please..God why is this happening now, I am at work and can’t deal with this right now..
__________________ Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: ohio, us
Posts: 15,446
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Feb 28, 2006 at 11:20 AM
#2
(((((((((((((((((evangelista))))))))))))))))
i'm very sorry. if grounding techniques aren't working, i would call t so that she can help you. that's what she's there for and i'm pretty sure she would want you to. what do you think? kd __________________ 
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Grand Member
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: \"die bunte Kuh\"
Posts: 973
18
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Feb 28, 2006 at 11:50 AM
#3
So sorry..okay..better..you were right I called him and took some Ativan, don’t use these very often forgot I had them..less reactive will help with calming the system down..again sorry..not used to flashbacks at work, can usually stay structured and ground myself, but something set it off and it took on an energy of it’s own..propels into selves and slides..he made it very clear that these times I need to contact him before we throw ourselves into switching mode..and do more damage..dont know why that is so hard to do..guess I am used to handling things on my own, its been a battle in Therapy for me to contact him when I need to.
__________________ Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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Feb 28, 2006 at 11:50 AM
#4
evangelista,
the very fact that you realize it is a flashback and that it is a memory only is a good thing! try and remind yourself that memories are memories and we do not have to let them hurt us anymore. you are safe in the future and what happened, as terrible as it was, can no longer hurt you. I am sorry you are having trouble. Do you think you could take the rest of the day off work to talk to T? I know you dont want to call her, but I bet she would be glad you called if she knew how you were feeling. |
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Grand Member
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: \"die bunte Kuh\"
Posts: 973
18
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Feb 28, 2006 at 11:55 AM
#5
Thank you I am so sorry I did not know what else to do but post...Just feeling a little dizzy now but it will be okay..sorry everyone...
__________________ Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: ohio, us
Posts: 15,446
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19 23 hugs
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Feb 28, 2006 at 12:27 PM
#6
There is NO reason for sorry. You did so good!!!!
I understand having a problem with calling t. my t used to have to remind me constantly that he would even appreciate so that he could better learn to help me in the moment. Evangelista, you did such a good job. you have no reason for sorries to anyone. I know it feels that way coming out of a period when we know we weren't in control, but you have nothing to feel sorry for, ok? I deal with that as well. I just want to make sure you know that. GREAT JOB, and I'm so glad you reached out for you and that we, and t, were available to you. kd __________________
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Feb 28, 2006 at 01:22 PM
#7
yes, no need for sorry!
I'M sorry if i came across as not wanting to read your posts, thats not at all what I meant. I just wanted to make sure you got everything you needed to feel better. We are here for you and you can post anytime you think you need it! And KD is right, wow! you did a great job! I am super proud of you too! |
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Feb 28, 2006 at 05:48 PM
#8
I just came on and saw this and you did terrific - you recognized you were having trouble and took steps (grounding tools, posting here, calling your therapist, and took your medication ) to take care of yourself. AMAZING and FANTASTIC. I cant do all that. when flashbacks hit me when Im out of the house I find the nearest public bathroom, put on my music and wait until it passes.
 WAY TO GO 
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Grand Member
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: \"die bunte Kuh\"
Posts: 973
18
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Feb 28, 2006 at 08:08 PM
#9
to much graphic detail in that last post, apologize, just frustrated with what I hear, and unable to get this stuff fixed, healed or whatever is suppose to happen. Hard day all around, but this to shall pass.
__________________ Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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Grand Member
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: \"die bunte Kuh\"
Posts: 973
18
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Feb 28, 2006 at 10:40 PM
#10
Thank you KD..thank you all..
 trying to b strong..it will be okay..baby steps..baby steps..
__________________ Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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Legendary
Member Since Oct 2004
Location: ohio, us
Posts: 15,446
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19 23 hugs
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Feb 28, 2006 at 10:52 PM
#11
Yes, and hopefully tomorrow you'll wake up "farther away" from this.
We're still here. kd __________________
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Grand Member
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: \"die bunte Kuh\"
Posts: 973
18
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Mar 01, 2006 at 08:39 AM
#12
Tired today....but grounded more..thank u...
__________________ Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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Veteran Member
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 397
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Mar 02, 2006 at 11:47 PM
#13
<font color="purple">Just writing to see how you are doing and if things are ok with you now. </font>
__________________ There is light at the end of the tunnel. We have proof. We found it!  - or at least have a strong grasp on it and not letting go. (Even though our healing is still happening.) woundedhearts |
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Legendary
Member Since Jan 2005
Location: USA
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Mar 03, 2006 at 12:28 PM
#14
((((((((((((((( Evan )))))))))))))))))
Many, many hugs, Jan __________________ I still dream and I still hope, therefore I can take what comes today. Jan is in Lothlorien reading 'neath a mallorn tree. My avatar and signature were created for my use only and may not be copied or used by anyone else. |
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Grand Member
Member Since Feb 2006
Location: \"die bunte Kuh\"
Posts: 973
18
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Mar 03, 2006 at 11:00 PM
#15
We had a session w/T this evening..very draining..but he/we is trying to work with flashbacks and alter who is so troubled and wants to hurt us..tired/drained..but safer tonight, not so scared..thank u to all for support and kind words..b safe my friends..
__________________ Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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