[MtnTime2896]

What does someone do when one personality keeps trying to take over so that they can "defend" you? Like, this person that is the cause of the threat isn't actually a threat, it's just in the person's mind, but the other personality doesn't care or doesn't understand that. They specifically want to take over to hurt that person, whom you care deeply for, and make that person scared to come near (even after you quit perceiving this person as the threat).

What do you do about this?

[amandalouise]

Originally Posted by Só leigheas

What does someone do when one personality keeps trying to take over so that they can "defend" you? Like, this person that is the cause of the threat isn't actually a threat, it's just in the person's mind, but the other personality doesn't care or doesn't understand that. They specifically want to take over to hurt that person, whom you care deeply for, and make that person scared to come near (even after you quit perceiving this person as the threat).

What do you do about this?

I think I understand what you are asking. in me I had alters that perceived people as threats of harm. that was their sense of agency to notice the threats and protect against them in what ever ways possible. even to the point of self injury, suicide or harming others. what happened with me was any time anyone was a danger to one self or others a hospitalization happened.

on the one side this was a way of teaching that it is wrong to be a harm to self and others. that it is illegal where I am to be a danger to self and others and can result in arrest or hospitalizations.

on the other side the hospitalizations helped in things like stabilizing and teaching self nurturing, self care and grounding so that the alter would not need to act out in self harm, suicide or harming others.

my suggestion is if you have one of these kinds of alters to contact your treatment providers so that a treatment plan can be worked on to help stabilize and help that alter to understand they cant harm you or others, that there are other ways of protecting everyone from threats with out harming one self and others.

Originally Posted by Só leigheas

What does someone do when one personality keeps trying to take over so that they can "defend" you? Like, this person that is the cause of the threat isn't actually a threat, it's just in the person's mind, but the other personality doesn't care or doesn't understand that. They specifically want to take over to hurt that person, whom you care deeply for, and make that person scared to come near (even after you quit perceiving this person as the threat).

What do you do about this?

Well, to beat the triggered take over...I try distractions. When I feel that Other coming on....I will stop, take a deep breath, refocus on something else, or just turn and walk away. Sometimes I would try talking to the Other to reason, work comprise, or let them know that it’s alright, or even find out why there is a problem.

What do you mean ‘cause of a threat isn’t actually a threat”? Sometimes what I don’t perceive as a threat an Other would because we are basically separate entities like 2 people are, built on different set of rules, emotions, and beliefs. It all boils down to talking and understanding if possible. Sometimes it’s a one sided conversation with me doing all the talking and the other is blabbing nothing but immaturity- but that might just be it’s m.o.

This is my two cents. Good luck sweety!

[MtnTime2896]

I just meant that while you'd go into fight or flight, you could still rationally see that this friend wasn't actually a threat. Yet, still felt threatened, regardless of rational thought.

Distraction is good and probably should've been more open to talking them down instead of freaking out and just yelling.

Originally Posted by Só leigheas

I just meant that while you'd go into fight or flight, you could still rationally see that this friend wasn't actually a threat. Yet, still felt threatened, regardless of rational thought.

Distraction is good and probably should've been more open to talking them down instead of freaking out and just yelling.

Oh, you talking instant on the spot knee jerk reaction.....well, that takes a bunch of mental conditioning and rehearsal....for me at least.

I repeatedly playy the failed scenario in my head until I learn the right reaction for that moment action...I’m a slow learner...but learn by experience eventually

[MtnTime2896]

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

Oh, you talking instant on the spot knee jerk reaction.....well, that takes a bunch of mental conditioning and rehearsal....for me at least.

I repeatedly playy the failed scenario in my head until I learn the right reaction for that moment action...I’m a slow learner...but learn by experience eventually

Alright. I'll do some practice. Thank you so much for helping me. This has been a nightmare for weeks.

[MtnTime2896]

Originally Posted by amandalouise

I think I understand what you are asking. in me I had alters that perceived people as threats of harm. that was their sense of agency to notice the threats and protect against them in what ever ways possible. even to the point of self injury, suicide or harming others. what happened with me was any time anyone was a danger to one self or others a hospitalization happened.

on the one side this was a way of teaching that it is wrong to be a harm to self and others. that it is illegal where I am to be a danger to self and others and can result in arrest or hospitalizations.

on the other side the hospitalizations helped in things like stabilizing and teaching self nurturing, self care and grounding so that the alter would not need to act out in self harm, suicide or harming others.

my suggestion is if you have one of these kinds of alters to contact your treatment providers so that a treatment plan can be worked on to help stabilize and help that alter to understand they cant harm you or others, that there are other ways of protecting everyone from threats with out harming one self and others.

Thank you. I'll bring it up with my T at my appointment in a couple days.