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QueenConfusion
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Member Since: Apr 2019
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Question Apr 11, 2019 at 01:09 PM
  #1
Okay, as my name suggests......I'm still confused. I'm struggling to even accept the possiblity of DID. I return to my 'T' (hey now, I'm picking up on the the lingo) later this month and I just don't even want to go. Some days, I don't feel anything and at this very moment I'm wondering if I've just been making it all up. Which doesn't make sense because I tried to describe every single thought, sensation and possible switch I know of with the help of my hubby down to the last detail. Maybe my 'girls' are on alter vacay. Maybe I should cancel the appointment and let the T know that maybe it's something else I'm experiencing. It's frustrating to not get any answers.

I've tried to be a 'christian-ish' (emphasis on TRIED and major emphasis on ISH)person all my life. I've been finding an interest in magick lately. And my husband has been vocal on 'who' he thinks he's talking to from time to time.

Anybody else go back and forth on accepting what is really going on?

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FearLess47
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Default Apr 11, 2019 at 06:17 PM
  #2
Dear Queen Confusion,
You are not alone in this confusion and questioning. Me too. I am currently in the discovery process with my T and it is sometimes overwhelming, sometimes a relief, sometimes scary and sometimes unbelievable...I convince myself I am making it all up. The thing is, I have had many surgeries and have some "actual" "physical issues that...if left to my own mind, I would convince myself that those never happened either. So I know that I don't always see the big picture or trust my own ideas and judgement at times.

I think maybe the key is to be open minded. Maybe DID. Maybe not. We all have "parts." There are varying degrees of everything. It can be tempting to rush into a diagnosis to point to...but even then, it will be a journey of soul excavation that will change and unfold.

Deep breaths....
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