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Claritytoo
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Member Since: Dec 2011
Location: Long Island NY
Posts: 1,272
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Default Dec 10, 2019 at 12:35 PM
  #1
I was recently diagnosed with cancer. I am receiving treatment and it is going well. But there was a time before I was diagnosed when I was close to death. I wasn't ready to go so I started treatment. But now I have a very close feeling of death. I know it is not far away. I have about 6 years. I want to make the most of them but all the problems I had before cancer are still here. My son is bi polar/delusional. He doesn't think he has a problem but there is a chance he could hurt me. It is very difficult knowing this because I have to be cautious around him. I also believe he is dissociative. He talks about his people in his head. And there are times when I know he has switched. He hears voices in his head and talks to them. He also hears voices from outside his head. These voices are negative and aggressive. He has heard voices from outside his head since he could talk. I moved back to my home state when I became ill. I was hoping to stay. But I don't think I can be this close to my son and not have anything to do with him. At present he is living in his car and receiving ssa. He pays a lot of child support and has nothing left to afford a place to live. He can not live with me because of the possible violence and because being around him causes me to switch alot. It causes depression and overwhelming anxiety. I am trying to decide if I should move out of state again. Far enough away from my son so he and I can try to continue living this life. I am exhausted.
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Betty_Banana
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Default Dec 11, 2019 at 08:09 AM
  #2
I'm really sorry for all that you're going through.It's understandable why you are exhausted.
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