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amandalouise
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Default May 29, 2020 at 10:33 AM
  #1
where I live (NYC) it is rich is opportunities. with Covid 19 much of those opportunities have moved online and pay per view and cable services. One such thing I found quite interesting and educational was one day I was scrolling through my local online services/ educational opportunities/ workshops/ seminars. I came across something that caught my eye. I "opened" to read the description. one liner mental illness in a virtual world, how safe are you?

the pay per view show dealt with having various mental illnesses and surfing the net, joining groups and forums and general internet safety.

The one thing that caught my attention was that they stated statistically those with dissociative disorders are ...........more........ susceptible to being internet stalked in online forums due to their easily triggered dissociative abilities. Because people with dissociative disorders are constantly, seemlessly (with little to no detection or outward signs) switching moods, behaviors and emotions. when they see something online or in videos, or are having video calling experiences that are triggering to them they move rather quickly from one extreme to another.

according to the show I watched on pay per view this uncontrollable emotions and behaviors leave a dissociative open to being stalked and attacked online with this new virtual world we have had to become. they do not have the control of their own selves therefore they tend to be in two categories.. the victim/ prey or they are the perpetrators of committing the stalking/ attacking others.

Victims/ prey in this virtual world we have had no choice but to embrace due to covid 19 are those who find their self to be constantly followed by the same online persons. then when they do post or have discussions the same online persons are right there on their.. behinds.... the show used another word. the victims/ prey are the ones that are constantly being corrected, put in their place, same emotional abuse that the dissociative person has undergone when they were being abused by their childhood abusers.

most times a dissociative victim/ prey according to this pay per view show called mental illness in a virtual world, do not realize that they are being attacked and stalked. this is because they are constantly switching when triggered.

The second category those dissociatives that become the abusers, the perpetrators of stalking and attacking others are aware that they are doing so and are able to control this behavior. they sit waiting for their victim/ prey to post or talk during the discussion and jump right on them every time. they are hypervigilient in making sure their target doesnt get past them. even it if means laying quiet on the forum or in the video calling situations until their prey/ victim posts or talks. they are taking out their anger and frustration of what happened to their selves out on others in the same emotional abusive ways that they their selves have been abused, much like a sexual abuser has most times been abused their self.

to me its ironic that when I am online reading posts anywhere I feel like I can pick up on when others are being stalked and attacked, who the victims and preys are and who the perpetrators are but not always protect myself from them. So out of curiosity I took the shows quizzes and discovered Im much better at it then I thought at protecting myself online.

the food for thought questions on the victims / prey side was...

do you find that you gravitate towards those that are being talked or replied to in a way meant to punish, deminish/ demorlaize, make corrections to or attack them?

do you find that you and your virtual discussions need to be just right before posting or saying what you want to say for fear that the moment you post someone, most likely the same person will jump on you and what you are trying to say?

do you notice the same persons responding/ replying to you in a punitive, condescending or attempts to put you in your place, correct or put you and your replies down?

Do you notice the same persons responding / replying to you in a way that they are trying to manipulate others into not believing anything you say or do, isolate you?

if you can say yes to these basic questions you are the victim/ prey. you most likely are being stalked / attacked in the same emotional abusive ways child abusers and domestic violence abusers use in attempts to control their victims and isolate them in abusive ways.

on the virtual abusers / perpetrators food for thought questions ..

do you have intentions to purposely read posts or participate in virtual discussions by the same persons you do not agree with with the intention of making sure they dont get one past you?

do you feel like you need to watch the same person online so that you can correct what they are saying and posting, demoralize them, put them and their discussions down as being wrong, distasteful?

Do you respond to the same person either directly or non directly in a negative way as a way to isolate, counter, or put them down rather than using walking away, mute, ignore, and other virtual tools?

Do you sit quietly just waiting for the same person to post or talk so that you can jump in and correct, demoralize, put them down, attempt to make sure no one else will believe them/ isolate them?

if you can answer yes to these questions you fall into the category of abuser/perpetrator.

then the show went into how to move from being the victim/ prey or abuser/ perpetrator.

victim / prey....

make an intention to stay grounded and present when in virtual discussions online or in video calling. not only does this help you practice your therapy tools it also helps you to recognize the stalkers/ emotional abusers / attackers.

know that you are not doing anything wrong. what you say and post is important to someone, maybe not the stalkers/ abusers but it is important for you to have your freedom to say or post too many years have gone by where your abusers in childhood had that emotional abuse and control over you, its time for you take back your voice and be heard. it does not matter if you say the sky is black and some one else says that BS the sky is blue. how things are for you, your location, your culture and so forth (the show went more in detail Im paraphrasing ) is how it is for you. shout it loud and clear, take back that voice of yours that has been abused from you, stand tall and be you. be a survivor not a victim nor someones prey.

check out the virtual "tools" used in forums and video calling, know how to use mute, ignore, report the stalkers/ attackers.

no one wants to mute/ignore or report but if no one does so then the virtual stalkers/ attackers will continue stalking/ attacking those they know will not mute/ ignore/ report. In non virtual world there are laws against stalking and attacking others. the virtual world also have their codes of conduct and laws. the only way to stop virtual bullies/ emotional abusers/ stalkers / attackers is by the victims following through with using the virtual tools for protecting their self and reporting the abusers.

If you find that you are dissociating during your virtual discussions in forums or video calling immediately end the discussion and reground, this closes the door on leaving yourself a victim or prey to an abuser/ stalker.

for the stalkers/ emotional abusers/ perpetrators

recognize your pattern. the first step to changing is recognizing the negative behavior

make an intention not to respond / stay away from your victim/ prey. this will be hard to do but will get easier as you continue to fight your habit of doing to others what was done to you.

talk to your mental health provider. they may know of ways for you to turn away from emotionally, virtually abusing / stalking / attacking others in this new virtual world we now live in.

all virtual situations (forums, zoom, ect..) have moderators / administrators that over see the virtual world. contact them when you may feel the need to correct or put someone elses discussions down, or put someone in their place. its their job to keep everyone safe and ensure the rules of the virtual world is safe for everyone including you.

I found this show to be very informative and I have only touched on what it contained. if you have cable pay per view you may want to check it out, it cost me $25.00 per hour episode and there was 6 episodes. its called mentally ill in a virtual world. it cam be found under pay per view documentaries.
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Default Jun 03, 2020 at 02:20 PM
  #2
I'm no longer dissociative but honestly, I don't post much at all on forums due to fear of being corrected,criticised,made to look like I don't know what I'm talking about,etc.

That's why I have been a member here since 2011 and I don't even have 700 posts yet. It's just not worth it to me.
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Default Jun 03, 2020 at 03:16 PM
  #3
Very informative summary, thanks!

It syncs up with what the mods tell us here - just walk away. Or report.
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Default Jun 04, 2020 at 07:48 AM
  #4
Bettey_Banana, I have been reading this forum for years and registered specifically to respond to a comment you made on the topic of integrating months ago. However, things you listed in this response about forums is why I decided not to at the end of the day.
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Default Jun 06, 2020 at 08:04 AM
  #5
Quote:
Originally Posted by amandalouise View Post
for the stalkers/ emotional abusers/ perpetrators

recognize your pattern. the first step to changing is recognizing the negative behavior

make an intention not to respond / stay away from your victim/ prey. this will be hard to do but will get easier as you continue to fight your habit of doing to others what was done to you.

talk to your mental health provider. they may know of ways for you to turn away from emotionally, virtually abusing / stalking / attacking others in this new virtual world we now live in..
For all, if you wish, attempt to comprehend why abusers need to abuse. What function does it carry out for them?

Quote:
all virtual situations (forums, zoom, ect..) have moderators / administrators that over see the virtual world. contact them when you may feel the need to correct or put someone elses discussions down, or put someone in their place. its their job to keep everyone safe and ensure the rules of the virtual world is safe for everyone including you..
Moderators are humans too, and do not always act in ways that heal. This makes the situation more difficult for you!

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Default Jun 06, 2020 at 05:10 PM
  #6
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Originally Posted by pachyderm View Post
For all, if you wish, attempt to comprehend why abusers need to abuse. What function does it carry out for them?



Moderators are humans too, and do not always act in ways that heal. This makes the situation more difficult for you!
in keeping with the video content they stated what to do if contacting moderators do not help... contact site creator and administrators and if you do in fact feel the administrators and site creators are being abusive/ stalking and so forth to contact your districts agencies that over see cyber crimes ie the police, better busness bureau, cyber crimes unit, the FBI.

according to this series filmed in 2020, in the USA these places will all open an investigation and prosecution into the cyber crime that you feel is being committed against you.

as for why abusers of emotional abuse/ stalking and so forth in forums and video chatting the video series does discuss this. in short this is not considered a "need" that mentally ill people doing it. it is according to the video a "learned behavior" a situation where those do to others what has been done to them.

its their normal. abusers emotionally and physically demoralized their victims, put them down, corrected them to the extreme abusive ways and isolated them, made sure no one would believe them.

for dissociative disordered stalkers/ emotional abusers according to the video series it became a way of life for them to be controlled and be controlling of others from a very early age.. a learned behavior that can be unlearned with therapy and other positive coping tools.

Im sure there are some who need to get a rush or what ever from stalking and emotionally abusing others but we are talking in terms of the video content which says its a learned behavior some victims just take on the same roles as their abusers.
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Default Jun 08, 2020 at 08:00 AM
  #7
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according to this series filmed in 2020, in the USA these places will all open an investigation and prosecution into the cyber crime that you feel is being committed against you.
I am presenting the idea that "prosecution" is really not a very useful thing to do. I think some more thoughtful consideration of what is going on is needed. There is dysfunction -- but would you want to prosecute cancer? Would that help?

Cancer is scary too. Think of how people have thought about cancer historically. Do we know better now?

Quote:
Im sure there are some who need to get a rush or what ever from stalking and emotionally abusing others but we are talking in terms of the video content which says its a learned behavior some victims just take on the same roles as their abusers.
Now why would some victims take on the same role as abusers? What (actual) need would that address?

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Default Jun 08, 2020 at 08:27 PM
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Originally Posted by pachyderm View Post
I am presenting the idea that "prosecution" is really not a very useful thing to do. I think some more thoughtful consideration of what is going on is needed. There is dysfunction -- but would you want to prosecute cancer? Would that help?

Cancer is scary too. Think of how people have thought about cancer historically. Do we know better now?



Now why would some victims take on the same role as abusers? What (actual) need would that address?
my suggestion is watch the video series if its in your area. this thread was to notify members that there is a video series on cable pay per view that may interest those with dissociative disorders about how to be safe online forums and video chatting.

if you are having a problem with someone stalking and so forth you will need to contact the site admins, moderators and those in your location that deals with such things. other than that theres nothing I can tell you other than use the tools offered you when online and video chatting of mute, ignore or report.

thank you for participating in this thread about the video series, Im interested in what you thought of the series and if you feel the information in the video series was helpful to you.

for me i found the series mental illness in a virtual world very helpful and many tools that I can add to my life to keep me and my family safe when online and in video chatting...

for example what did you think of that background they used in the video series to prevent those that may hack in, or others may see, during zooming and other video chatting from seeing family photos on the walls, street signs and so forth. I thought it was very creative.
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Default Jun 12, 2020 at 02:38 PM
  #9
I am now on the 4th episode of this video series. last night the food for thought was be mindful of what your own posts say about you. Do not include any identify able information, example if you live near the Washington Monument do not discuss, nor mention that famous landmark. if you live on smith street do not discuss that street. if you must designate a location pick a big city, not your little town.

To think about what your chats, video calls, post and posting styles say about you. do you want to be the known strike out at, complainer, fake, wild, happy go lucky, get along with everyone, (paraphrasing).... are your chats video calls and posts informative in a good way or the way you want others to perceive you?

looking back at my history of posts here I see that I have done a good job following the video series advice.

my location is a big major city in the USA, I dont post anything about my street, though I have from time to time posted about my family I dont do so by identifying their actual given names, actual knicknames. and my DID posts do not include the .....actual names of my alters nor is my user name any connection to my real life.

by my history of my posts I see that I am showing exactly how I want others on forums to see me ... All lives and posts matter. I typically do not name call, nor strike out at others or others posts, I have on rare occasion done so and took the time needed to get back on track with my meds and so forth to ensure that I am the kind of person that accepts everyone and their posts unconditionally. I have had to learn to use that ignore button that this site has in every members profiles.

upon rereading my posts here I found Im a very like able person who likes to help others, share what I know about my mental disorders and physical health problems. heres what I wrote last night about the videos food for thought questions....

When I am talking about specific mental disorders that information comes from many places...

first and foremost I have personally been diagnosed with each of these disorders through the years, that I post about.

Unlike many with mental disorders I take time with my treatment providers to ..........Fully..........understand what my mental and physical health problems are.

I literally schedule appointments to sit down with my treatment providers with a list of questions. I ask things like ...

labeling/ diagnostic name
diagnostics criteria
how that label and diagnostics are used on a wide scale
how are they used in terms of pertaining directly to me

I ask about symptoms both the obvious and the "other accompanying symptoms" I need to be aware of,

I ask about treatment options
in terms of treatment I ask about side effects both good and bad.

and much more..

I also have many on my team of treatment providers ... a therapist, psychiatrist and a psychologist, a primary care physician, a neurologist, a rehabilitation specialist, and more...

I also for my own personal use with my mental and physical health problems have my own copies of (and know how to use them correctly)

DSM 5
ICD 10 and the website link for the ICD11
PDR
The Pill Book
Tabors medical encyclopedia

I have also signed up and participate in the DSM / supplemental updating process through the American Psychiatric Associations website. (anyone can participate in their updating process. some things are open to professionals and other things are open to anyone) I receive newsletters, Im a part of the forum and other things too, like submitting proposals or ideas for changes...

I also use my cable, Roku and other avenues (colleges, mental health agencies and so forth to participate free and for fee and pay per view resources like

seminars
workshops
retreats
classes
and more

related directly to my own mental and physical health problems.

Because I like to be fully informed and make fully informed decisions about my mental and physical health I have gained quite an education in the field of mental health and mental disorders.

and yes because of all this knowledge / self educating on my own problems I officially went into the career of mental health services. Just like someone who has undergone domestic violence will sometimes volunteer and then later
become employed by a domestic violence agency, or someone who had an addictions problem may decide to go to work with an agency that helps people with their addictions. Or someone who has undergone abuse may decide to work with abused and at risk children...

I choose to be proactive, go directly to the sources of accurate information and keep on top of this ever changing world of labeling and diagnostics and so forth.

though there are some on the net, once I share what I have learned in this process, that may like the video series Mental illness in a Virtual world stated try and shoot you down, isolate me in a way of making it appear that what I post is untrue, trash, garbage, hog wash, BS, most are accepting and either at that moment or some time later come back to me saying they discovered my information was right on the money.

I am really enjoying this video series. lots of information and reflection going on here.
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