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Old 02-14-2017, 10:41 AM #71
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Default Re: Welcome to Divorce and Separation

"Good on you Grandessa"

I have been divorced for 8yrs now! First few months was shear hell for me! (Thank god my 3 girls had grown up!) Could not sleep, eat, wash, go out, talk to anyone, looking for answers and stirring into the gas fire like a zombie!!!!!!!!!!!!

`NOW` Over the turmoil (Thank God) More barriers guarding my heart now!!!
Depression and anxiety has calmed down to a certain degree!!!

`I know that this will never happen again` CAUSE, I will stay on my own!!!!!
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Old 02-19-2017, 12:27 PM #72
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Thanks Campervanman (story behind that handle?)

I'm kind of excited by what I'm learning from this. Truth be told, I have a great life��
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Old 02-26-2017, 08:45 AM #73
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Default Re: Welcome to Divorce and Separation

Flintstone is exactly right! My former husband gave me divorce papers 4 months ago after a 41 year marriage. Now I get to heal a "victim mentality" that I've had from childhood, where my mother victimized me and encouraged my 6 siblings to do so as well. An old trauma that is now revealed so it can be healed. Not easy, and like Jamielow, I was gutted and did not see this coming. Went straight back into the early trauma and was suicidal. Too much pain... more than I felt I could bear.

Doing better now, but still triggered. Now, more aware and beginning work on boundaries with the lifelong victim trauma.

Motto: keep living until you feel alive again.
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Old 04-01-2017, 07:29 AM #74
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I just divorced in Jan 2017.
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Old 05-04-2017, 10:23 AM #75
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I have a question....I was in prison for 50 months and 2 days. Upon my return, I found out that my wife had a relationship with another man during the 13 till the 23rd month of my incarceration. She never told me about it and I only discovered it through some emails that she failed to delete.
My question....did she cheat on me?
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Old 08-15-2017, 11:38 PM #76
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Quote:
Originally Posted by George5364 View Post
I have a question....I was in prison for 50 months and 2 days. Upon my return, I found out that my wife had a relationship with another man during the 13 till the 23rd month of my incarceration. She never told me about it and I only discovered it through some emails that she failed to delete.
My question....did she cheat on me?
No,,,,,,,,, definitely no
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Old 08-15-2017, 11:40 PM #77
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Originally Posted by Grandessa View Post
I hope you are doing better. We have to do what we have to do for awhile to manage the shock and pain. I drank a lot of alcohol and called people and sobbed while I was drunk. Now have a counselor, support group, and family and friends (despite drunken rants.) I completely fell apart. Almost 6 months have passed now and am doing much better. Joined a health club and got a personal trainer and am looking to move to a community with more people my age (I'm 63!) Divorce process coming to conclusion. My old life is gone.

You will eventually get out of bed... it's a process. You will get through this, but I know about the gut-wrenching pain.
Appreciated...
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Old 03-30-2018, 01:03 AM #78
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I got divorced two years ago. My ex has been cheating for six years and left me eight years ago and came back. I have a wonderful boyfriend. I am happy and don't have craziness in my life. I look at my ex and think no way would I like him back, I wouldn't even know how to spend time with him. I just can't let go of him. I feel like I am carrying a dead cat around by its neck, instead of skipping through the tulips of life. I think the hardest thing is for me to let go of someone who promised to love me and be there for me forever. He was nice the first year and looking elsewhere the next twenty seven. I think all his problems made him swear we were destined for each other, and all my problems made me hold onto his promise. I wanted to believe in someone and I kept my eyes shut and wished hard for such a long time. Maybe I can forgive myself and try again, just not with my eyes shut this time.
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Old 04-03-2019, 01:32 PM #79
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My divorce was final 12/2018 but we were separated since 1/2012.
How do I move on without comparing my new boyfriend to my ex?
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