[TML8277]

Filed for divorce over a week ago. My husband has been on a whirlwind roller coaster and I don't know what I can do that is still healthy for me and my kids.

The marriage has been so hard... He sunk into a deep depression, quit working, quit taking care of himself, quit trying anything... Self medicates. He's tried coming out of it, but he's angry and mean and so so negative. I just can't anymore. My kids and I need to find our way back to healthy.

I still love him. I want the best for him. But, he puts the weight of his living and surving on me. How can I get through this? What if he does hurt himself? How am I supposed to deal with that? My healthy brain knows that distance is the best thing and that I can't fix this for him, he has to. But the brain that hears him feels that this is the worst thing I can do to him. How do you get someone to live on their own? He won't see a doctor. He blames me for where he is... Any words of advice??

[metalchick]

Be strong. You are doing the right thing. It is not your fault he is in this place. He has to own up to what he has done to your family.

[healingme4me]

Be firm within yourself to call for a wellness check if he does threaten to harm himself. During break ups like this, it's sometimes a manipulative tactic.

It's not fair of him to blame you for things that he chooses to do that negatively impact your family unit.

Are you seeking counseling for yourself throughout all of this. It can be a valuable resource while navigating the ups and downs of divorce.