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RDMercer
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Default Jul 28, 2019 at 08:38 AM
  #1
I'm reading Gottmans stuff on the four horsemen. I know I stonewall.

My wife has a topic that angers her, which is we (she) had little contact from my family during a prolonged illness. We've been on this topic, literally, for two years. I've spoken to them, and so has she. Her anger at them comes out at me about once a month, and she gets very derogatory in her language with me. At some point I say, "I can't do this. I can't hear this stuff said about me anymore. I'm walking away. "

I will then refuse to speak about that topic. The next it comes up, her anger flares, and I back out of it. I've begun marking the time, and after an hour I'll make a move to leave.

She's not going to change this. But I have my.limits.

Ideas?
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Anonymous48672
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Default Jul 28, 2019 at 09:53 AM
  #2
Are you and your wife separated now? Is divorce where you are headed?

I read your previous threads about your porn addiction and marriage counseling efforts. Sounds like something a marriage counselor could help you with.
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overthinkingme
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Default Sep 24, 2019 at 04:04 PM
  #3
the topic is about the family not talking to her during a prolonged illness.. ? er?

Tell her your honest feelings about it, maybe even say it hurts to hear you talk like that and she what she responds with or does. I wish my husband would have been open in his communication with me. about these things.. (Not the same thing, but similar.. )
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