[UpDownAround]

Upload still busted. Went slightly over 1500 today; maybe. I did a lot of estimating about my dinner, where I had a big bowl of soup and a huge sweet potato.

[bizi]

I have made it 11 days Alcohol Free!
Tomorrow is a christmas dinner party.
I don't think I can diet and not drink....
wish me luck!
bizi

[Tucson]

Another hectic day. I am becoming less disciplined. I need to change this. If I do not plan out my meals for the day, I end up eating less than I should. Then I try to make up the difference with one last calorie full meal and hope I get in enough calories. This is no way to manage my food intake. I will have to go back to my regular routine. It looks like I am not ready to eat without planning ahead. Besides, planning ahead is the only way to insure that I will have enough calories by the end of the day, but still not gain weight when I get to my goal of 180 pounds.

I had two hotdogs, a yogurt smoothie, french toast, and I actually have forgotten what I had for lunch. I am sure this will eventually come back to me. I know I had a below 2000 calorie day. That Nutribullet does a good job. That was a good purchase. I also ate some peanut butter cookies.

[99fairies]

If I pigged out one day, how many days till it would show it on the scale?

[bizi]

I don't know how I will survive tonight lots of food and drinks abound.
and my fingers are bandaidless.
I started picking at my thumb last night at trivia.
my tdoc suggested I get a fidget or a little bracelet with a dangly
thing from it to wear and play with...I have not shopped for that yet.
she also suggested alternatively to wear a long piece of jewerly that I could play with as well. something to do with my hands.
This is the biggest test to my sobriety. They are serving fish chowder.
I just told jeff that I don't want to spend that much time at the party tonight, because I am dieting and not drinking he said that is fine.
I hope you have a good saturday!
bizi

[99fairies]

Bizi... I am so proud of you! You are doing so well! With not drinking and sticking to your diet. Congratulations!

[Tucson]

I made it to 180 pounds today. I have made peanut butter cookies, so I need to watch out from eating too many. Today I am planning out my menu for the day. I found out that a yogurt smoothie made from Greek Gods greek yogurt has a significant amount of calories due to its high amount of milk fat, so I can use this as a healthy way to boost calories.

[UpDownAround]

Still 183 this morning. I don't record tenths but they did drop from last time. But a few days back I saw 182 (it was a "perfect storm" of dehydration and timing around certain bodily functions). Still staying the course.

[Tucson]

I am full, but I still have dinner to go. Hopefully, I will be able to eat it before bedtime. I need to resist the temptation to eat more cookies than one a day. The image upload still is broken. I will consume 2200 calories for this day, and possibly bit more by the end of the day.

[Cocosurviving]

I almost ate sonic but I went to Arby’s. I ate a turkey Swiss cheese on wheat

[bizi]

I survived the christmas party!
I came prepared.
Purse with makings for tea including cup and stevia to sweeten the tea and gum in case I needed to eat/chew something sweet.
At 6;30 I was hungry so Before going there I ate a slice of cheddar cheese and a handful of smoked almonds,
At the party This is what I ate:
a bowl of smoked cod chowder(like potato soup)
3 small slices of cheese and 2 small crackers.
small orange, luscious pear, one small bite of just fair chocolate moose...
(I don't know how to spell it)
came home at 10;30 and ate a small bag of pop corn.
I came in 3rd for the ugly christmas sweater contest.
LOL
and the best part: I knew almost every one there so not much social anxiety!!! We have on e more gathering to go to on tuesday nite, I already packed my silver purse with tea bags, cup etc so that is ready to go.
There will be quite a few people I don't know. Yikes!
I drank nothing but tea, I socialized and was not anxious, I managed to eat health foods, I did not pick at my fingers or face.
It was a successful evening.
bizi

[Tucson]

I like how you prepared for the meal. Nice going.

[liveforsummer]

Ate ok today until I baked cookies and ate 3.

[UpDownAround]

Still can't upload. Yesterday came up slightly short of 1500 but over 1400. I picked up one of my kids from a late shift and it was about 2 am Saturday morning before I got to sleep. I slept in a little, so it was like breakfast and lunch kind of merged. At the end of the day, I was eating a few things (ice cream, a banana, raisins) just to get the count up even though I really wasn't hungry. But if I let the count slip and then see the scale move, I will have a hard time sticking to eating enough to be healthy. It makes no sense for me to stall eating 1500; I know this from a practical standpoint, doing the math on how much I was losing at ~1000. Frustrating...

[99fairies]

Why are you frustrated Updown? Do you want to lose faster? You've been killing it, so try to be kind to yourself.

[bizi]

There is a lot of emotions surrounding eating. I hope we can make healthy choices and enjoy what we choose to eat.
((((HUGS)))))
bizi

[bizi]

179 this morning...down 6 pounds in 2 weeks.
yeah!
bizi

[Tucson]

My weight went back down to 178. Interesting. I am paranoid over the weight going up, for how do I manage not gaining any weight, and also paranoid about losing weight, for I already have lost too much too fast. I need to find a range in calories that will work for me, and find a way to keep to that range of calories. Hopefully I will be able to maintain my weight without counting every calorie that I consume.

I am suspicious of there being a very slim range of calories given to maintain a specific weight. I did some calculations and found that the amount of calories to maintain my current weight is not that much different from the amount at the time I was 235 pounds. For instance, the maintenance level of calories for my 178 pounds is 2037. The amount when I was 235 pounds is 2347. This is not that much of a difference, perhaps a few cookies or a couple slices of banana bread. When I was 235 pounds, I consumed many more calories than what is listed as a maintenance level of calories. I still remained at that weight with no change in my eating habits and calorie intake. I maintained that weight for years.

Any thoughts? Perhaps I do not remember those days that were much closer to my maintenance calorie count of 2037?

[bizi]

Tucson, my opinion would be to try to eat as healthy as you can and not too many sweets.Eat protein at every meal. Are you able to lift weights? This helps you to not lose muscle.
Sorry if I have not folled you in your journey.
I comend you for your weight loss! and am envious. My path has finally started so I am making small steps. It will take me a long time to lose this weight. my mood is more stable now so maybe I can stick to my diet.
good luck.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

[Tucson]

Thank you bizi. I made the mistake in making several desserts in a row. I made a mistake here in my zeal to bake in the kitchen again. My last dessert was very rich homemade pudding with a crust on top. Must be a hundred calories a spoonful. So I need to slow down allot. I am having others help me eat my desserts to keep me from eating the whole thing. So I totalled 2500 calories today. This is too much, and I am starting to gain weight. I want to keep my weight around 180 to 185. Perhaps my calorie count should be between 2100 and maybe at most 2300 a day. As a side note, it looks like the upload of images is still broken.

I am going to try to start having healthy meals, and only one small dessert a day. Today I ate canned green beans. However, I placed a slab of butter on it. I was next thinking adding grated Romano cheese. This is too much. I also must return to making salads. I have been having a yogurt smoothie a day. I need to stretch this out over a two day period to make it more affordable. I do not want return to how I ate before this, because I will eventually reach 235 again. I cannot afford to let this happen. That would be very depressing.

I have lost allot of muscle. I think protien drinks would of helped. So I should soon start exersizing, not to lose weight, but build back what I have left of some of my muscle.