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Default Nov 18, 2018 at 07:40 PM
  #1
I have been on a diet for literally 30 years now. And yet, I am exactly the same weight I was when I first started. I am an advanced dieter. I have tried everything. But nothing works.

Mostly, the biggest issue for me is two things.

1. inaccurate dieting information during my life time and
2. WORKING.

Working is simply too big of a commitment for me to be able to keep from gaining weight. A full time job with commute does not allow for you to have special needs and I have special needs (lower metabolism)

But I also know I have to lose this weight, for my health, and my sanity. At this point I would take just a 50 lb loss and keeping it off. But if I make that -- I can gain it quickly.

Also I am terribly weak and I have to gain strength or spend my elderly years in pain and misery.

But I am scared. If you can't do it in 30 years... you will never do it right?

Or am I wrong, is there a chance? Does anyone know of anyone who was able to do it with 30 years of failures?
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Default Nov 18, 2018 at 07:44 PM
  #2
I think a lot of the diets out there don't really work. You usually lose a lot of weight fast, but as soon as you stop the diet, you gain it all back. I also don't think cutting out certain foods entirely (like sugar or carbs) is realistic. For me, what worked best was not having any forbidden foods but just eating fewer carbs and more protein.
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Default Nov 24, 2018 at 11:53 AM
  #3
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Originally Posted by downandlonely View Post
I think a lot of the diets out there don't really work. You usually lose a lot of weight fast, but as soon as you stop the diet, you gain it all back. I also don't think cutting out certain foods entirely (like sugar or carbs) is realistic. For me, what worked best was not having any forbidden foods but just eating fewer carbs and more protein.
Agree, but I can't believe I have been trying this since I was 16 or 17 and have utterly failed. Nothing in my life I have put this much effort into only to fail.

My newest plan is

- three meals a day with approximately 300 calories each meal.
- give up Hershey's chocolate -- I believe the brand is addicting.
- try to avoid snacks completely.
- stop getting on the scale.
- stop obsessing on dieting and just learn to live at a set norm.
- start weight lifting -- I am not a strong woman.

But I am at this point where it is seriously doubtful if I can lose any weight at all. Recently it seems like I can only lose if I eat 500 cals per day.

I believe there is a plateau effect that happens about 16 weeks for me after starting to diet. But I don't know what to do to get around it.
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Shocked Nov 26, 2018 at 01:09 AM
  #4
I do not think it is water weight. Over the long run, this cancels itself out. We are talking 30 years here. Have you been recording your calorie intake? How many calories do you eat on your typical day? Have you found yourself going off of your diet from time to time? You will only know this if you accurately logged every calorie. All diets do is make themselves attractive to the dieter. If a diet keeps you on track, then it works.

It all comes down to the daily calorie intake, and nothing else. A typical person maintains there weight by consuming about 2080 calories a day. If you want to lose a pound a week, then you need to eat around 1500 calories a day. One pound of fat is 3500 calories. You need to measure out or weigh the food you eat. Getting a food scale is a good idea. Some form if exercise can help. You can exercise more once you have lost enough weight for this. What is interesting is when you cut calorie consumption your body adjusts to this by slowing your metabolism. So this can work against you, but I think it is still doable. You will remain hungry during much of the day for awhile. You need to get used to this. Allot of salty foods can make your body retain water. Also if you eat some forms of ruffage, the same thing can happen.

I definitely would weigh yourself every day or every other day. Not doing this is just avoiding the problem you are trying to solve. Only in this way will you be able to see your weight change, and also see false spikes up or down which happens from time to time. If you continue to gain weight or remain the same by the end of the week, you will then need to cut your food consumption further. I have seen people eat only 1200 calories a day. Some intermittent fasting can help too.There are different ways to do this that does not involve starving yourself for a week. That is definitely not the way to go. Besides not working, this is IMO very unhealthy and unnecessary.

So I recommend that you log calories for each and every item you eat. Weigh yourself frequently every week. And then adjust your calorie intake accordingly. This will take some time to figure out and reliably do this. Focus and discapline are paramount here. Programs like Weight Watchers can help you with this in your efforts to lose weight along with the support of other people there to do the same. Oh yes, stay away from treats, food that comes with allot of calories, like mashed potatoes and pancakes with syrup, and stop drinking soda. There are foods like salads fill you up with very little in calories. Use salad dressing sparingly. Pickles also do not have much in calories. I have found juicing as a way to diet. However, this can get expensive. Once you get to your goal, you then need to gecome familar with which foods and portions to eat. Even when you are at this point, IMO you will still need to weigh yourself, like perhaps once a week.

PS It just takes time to move past the plateau. Some people think they have stopped losing weight, but if they measured their waist, the may find it still is shrinking.

FWIW

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Last edited by Tucson; Nov 26, 2018 at 01:56 AM..
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Default Nov 26, 2018 at 05:58 AM
  #5
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It all comes down to the daily calorie intake, and nothing else. A typical person maintains there weight by consuming about 2080 calories a day.
No I think you're wrong. I think the truth is, and it will be proven eventually, that everyone is different. For instance I have had my metabolism tested twice and my BMR is anyplace from 1280 to 1500 -- likely total cals for the day 1400 to 1800. But the math doesn't add up. Typically it takes 800 cals or less to see a 1 lb weight loss per week.

I am not just a dieter, I am an expert dieter. I have tried EVERYTHING... several times over. Sometimes I think well, the good news is that I know what doesn't work.

At first, of about 50 things tried, I tried weight watchers. I watched the calories and about 30 lbs came off. However, then I got stuck. What I like to call.. "mega plateau". Reducing food and increasing exercise did nothing. I stayed like that for a year. Until I just couldn't any longer. This same pattern has gone on for years. I can lose weight but, then I hit a mega plateau. My most famous one was a liquid diet. I did that to prove to the naysayers that I wasn't "cheating" and guess what happened? I hit mega plateau. Even the diet plan had no answers for me.

Almost everything people suggest doesn't make much of a difference.
- weight lifting? Nada.
- exercise, nada.
- Changing what I eat to improve gut bacteria, nada.
- diet pills.. work a little.

Logging calories is my specialty -- along with getting on the scale. But this time around I have decided that is a mistake. It just makes the focus on the dieting too much. I just try to keep a rough estimate in my head and try not to go over 1000 calories.

I don't think I am alone either. There is a famous weight loss blog where they main person has exactly the profile as me. She also hasn't succeeded.

My sister recently lost weight with legal marijuana. It was just legalized where I am. Right now it is impossible to get into a shop but I hope in 6 months when I could be hitting mega plateau it will work.

ETA: One reason I lay things at the feet of working is that when I was a kid I was thin. I would play sports for about 4 hours every day. But, I cannot make that kind of commitment anymore. I don't have 4 hours to play games. People always say I should exercise but the point is I need to do a LOT of exercise for a difference and I no longer have the time or energy to do that on a consistent basis.
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Default Nov 26, 2018 at 07:46 AM
  #6
If you do not eat enough calories, you will not lose weight. Your body needs to metabolize what you consume.

There are a lot of fad diets out there - I'm sure you're aware if you've been dieting for over 30 years. And, as your body ages, it changes, and it gets harder to lose weight.

The research is overwhelming that diets are not effective - and you are living proof.

Have you talked to your doctor about some strategies? Had a recent physical and blood work?

I am 44 and have struggled with obesity in my adult years, almost entirely due to my lifestyle. I am a shift worker, I am completely useless in the kitchen so every meal I eat out is fast food, and I'm lazy so I don't exercise.

Last year I went for weight loss surgery (it'll be a year tomorrow actually!) and have managed to lose 72 pounds. I have eight more pounds to go to reach my goal. I chose this route because I know that dieting is ineffective and unsustainable.

It might be an option for you to explore if you are not having success.
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Default Nov 26, 2018 at 01:14 PM
  #7
@Emily Fox Seaton:

What did your logging of calories tell you? For instance, at what point does actual weight loss occur? There is a number for this. It may be for instance 1500, 1800, or 1200 calories. Your basal metabolic rate appears to be much lower than mine of 1800. A good starting point can be determined from this number. Once this is ascertained either way, from experience or from calculation, you then have a basis to determine what calorie intake will cause you to lose weight. Either way, there will be a calorie count that will cause you to lose weight. This “magic number” just may be different for you than others.

Here is another way to look at it. Each pound of fat represents 3500 calories. This is irrespective of the individual burning that fat. Each week if your body burns this amount of calories over the amount required for you to maintain your weight, this will likely cause you to lose that pound of fat every week. Where else is the energy coming from? This amounts to 500 calories less each day. However, I do understand that the target of calories consumed resulting from this approach may be very difficult for a person to maintain over a long period of time. I think this is very common for a great many other individuals. If it were not for my own particuiar situation, I know it would of been very very difficult for me to maintain this calorie count for an extended period of time.

I am sure you know much of what I said here. I do empathize with you and your plight. I can see it is very frustrating for you. I am hoping that I am helping you in some way. I know this approach to losing weight may not work for you. All I can do is relate my aquired knowledge and experience to you with regards to what I found worked for me.

BTW by eating quite less than I usually did for an extended period of time, in about six months I lost 60 pounds by essentially an unintended diet. Most of this occured during the first two months. This is at a rate of one to two pounds a day! This is very unhealthy. I did not intend to lose this weight, but this still came as a nice surprise. I was going through a terribly stessful time in my life causing my body to waste away. In this situation the lack of food consumption was easy, but for the wrong reasons. Heck, my later consumption of 800 to then 1200 calories a day was an improvement. I was in bad shape.

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Last edited by Tucson; Nov 26, 2018 at 03:03 PM..
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Default Nov 30, 2018 at 06:57 AM
  #8
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What did your logging of calories tell you? For instance, at what point does actual weight loss occur?
It is hard to tell but it is definitely under 1000 per day. If I eat 1200 I don't lose. I have had my metabolism tested three times now. 1 time it came out at 1400, the other two around 1500 (this is total calories used not BMR) So it has to be around 1400 to 1500 or so.

The problem is that less than 1000 in this world is extremely hard to do with any consistency. Never mind when you have to work.
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Default Dec 07, 2018 at 07:44 AM
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Working is simply too big of a commitment for me to be able to keep from gaining weight. A full time job with commute does not allow for you to have special needs and I have special needs (lower metabolism)
I do not understand this statement. You can have a full time job with a commute and eat as much or as little as you want and freely make choices.

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Default Dec 07, 2018 at 10:09 AM
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I do not understand this statement. You can have a full time job with a commute and eat as much or as little as you want and freely make choices.
I bet you don't. As I have said, it isn't about eating as much or little. I eat the bear minimum and you would probably say "oh your eating too little" -- each food out an about is a TON of calories and to lose weight via exercise I need to do double or triple what someone else does. So you do 40 minutes of exercise a day and I need to do 3 hours.

I need to be PERFECT on my eating for a long time and do the 3 hours of exercise to see any headway. And that just isn't possible with a real job.
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Default Jan 28, 2019 at 12:00 AM
  #11
You are eating too little and your body thinks that you are living through famine. It holds on to every precious calorie you eat.

What happens to you if you start eating normally - neither too much nor too little, but what feels just right (stopping before you feel bloated, of course), and, if you just move at a pleasurable rather than punishing pace, enjoying your movement? What happens when you pay attention to the taste, aesthetics and versatility of your meals, instead of their calorie count? Likewise, what happens when you focus not on the caloric expenditure of exercise, but on the hedonic aspect of it - say, if you walk or run outside, you might see birds or changing seasons or sun rays. So what happens to your weight (and sense of overall wellbeing) when you shift focus from punishment to pleasure?

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Default Apr 26, 2019 at 09:41 AM
  #12
So after much thinking about things I have decided that I am DONE with dieting.

For over the last 4 months I have been eating whatever I wanted. Last week I had my metabolism tested and I am happy to report that my BMR is up to 1750. So I think clearly reducing my calorie intake reduces my BMR. This very well could be the reason for my struggle. Almost once per year I expertly reduce my metabolism via diet. I am suppressing my own metabolism via trying to take weight off... this leads to weight gain.

No matter what, I will not significantly reduce the amount of food I eat. I will simply work on building muscle and exercise. Working does make it difficult to exercise, but i purchased some items for the home and I have decided to just got to bed later.

I am trying to keep my calories around 1500 per day. But that is my goal.. eat 1500 cals per day and exercise and that is my goal.

I will NEVER look at the scale again. The scale is a serious problem.
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Default Jun 25, 2019 at 11:17 PM
  #13
Great decision, Emily!

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