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darkside8
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Default Jan 08, 2019 at 02:35 PM
  #1
Anyone here who has been, or are in, therapy for generalised anxiety disorder (or even social anxiety), did you have to work with your T on exploring the causes before working on recovering? How important was that? Had the reasons for your anxiety, when explored, taken you to some dark and deep places of discomfort? If so, despite how hard it must have been to discuss it, did you find that was extremely important for recovery?

Anyone not find a deep, hidden reason why and the causes of it were more the stresses of education and work, and wanting everything to be perfect?

Please try to provide as much detail if you can, thanks ever so much!
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Default Jan 08, 2019 at 03:10 PM
  #2
I've never experienced this, darkside8. However I believe it's absolutely normal to explore the possible causes of your anxiety before working on it. And yes, sometimes it can bring you to some uncomfortable places and not be pleasent at all. However I also believe it's important to give some coping skills to help you deal with anxiety. If you feel like your therapy isn't being helpful or that there aren't a lot of hidden reasons for your anxiety, I'd suggest to talk to your therapist about this and see how it goes from there. It's important to be honest and clear. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you
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Default Jan 09, 2019 at 12:01 AM
  #3
I actually had an intense 2 year DBT group that taught skills & understanding of how the mind works along with private therapy at the same time.

I was a mess when I left my H but didn't know ALL that was underlying the mess. I learned skills to handle my emotions but more importantly I learned WORDS & descriptions for ALL the emotions I was actually feeling. Before that all I recognized was my anger that I had lived experiencing all my life. Learning WHY I felt the anger was a work in process but it brought to light why I had experienced anxiety all my life I hadn't even realized I was experiencing.

All my life I thought my parents problems were because they only just barely got through high school so I put pressure ON MYSELF to excel in school & get my BS degree & a career which I finally got in computer engineering & accounting along with an AA degree in music. I had a drive that my parents had no concept of not did they support it. I had no idea just how much anxiety it had actually had on my life till I looked back & realized I had to fight for everything I achieved.

That didn't change in marriage either. I swore I would not marry anyone like my dad & thought education level was the key.....but it was nothing but constant fighting just like in my growing up family.

It wasn't till after my intense therapy & I started working with my T to integrate my past that it came to light that both my dad & my H (all before Asperger's/ASD was even known about) buth were on the spectrum. Different places IQ wise but not behavior wise & neither could communicate or emotionally connect. Wow & all that time I thought I was just the kind of person that just fought people that caused problems in my life.

It was so amazing to have my T tell me that my reactions were NORMAL considering what I had been living with. My dad had died in 1989, long before I had this therapy & I had left my H almost 6 years before that point. Being away from him I notices my anxiety level drop until he did something really irritating that caused me trouble (IRS back taxes & home foreclosure both due to his financial irrespinsibility & inability to communicate) but the anxiety was less because I was no longer living around him.

It was a huge process where I initially took the step to change my environment (escape 2100 miles away) then get into good therapy & also develop a wonderful support network of really awesome people.(I will also say my T is the best & most caring T I have ever known & is awesome like that with everyone). Also for me, moving from Los Angeles where one gets lost in the crowd to a small town of 8,000 was great because it gave me a chance to really learn who I was not who I was reacting to people who caused issues in my life. Learning the DBT skills helped deal with anyone who has caused issues now so that is no longer cause for anxiety either.

Lol....a lot I didn't say here or it would be a book I write.....but healing is possible & it is a combination of learning about past things while learning skills that we never learned growing up to be able to handle those things. It has been an 8 year process. I moved here in 2007 & started therapy in 2010 after having only a few months of therapy when I first moved here.

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Default Jan 12, 2019 at 06:54 AM
  #4
My own anxiety is at an all time high. I hope you find the answer as I am looking for it too.

I have mentioned Muse elsewhere and while I have only used the device a handful of times it has provided some relief. It obviously isn't the answer as it just masks the problem but it is definitely a tool and helping me cope.
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Default Jan 12, 2019 at 09:46 AM
  #5
For a period of about a year about 7 years ago I experienced agoraphobia due to a traumatic event. I wouldnt leave the house and was afraid to drive. In fact I would only drive if my husband took me somewhere. I even had to have a couple of phone consults with my doctor because I was too afraid to leave. Same thing with my therapist at the time. He recommended basic exposure therapy and medication. I took xanax for the panic and started walking to the corner and back. Then driving to the corner and back gradually increasing it to my neighborhood, then local stores, then more and more. It took about 6 months but I was pretty much ok after that.

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Default Jan 13, 2019 at 08:30 AM
  #6
I seem to be relatively okay given those things I am in control of; like routine errands and chores out of the house. It is those things, like work, where things are constantly changing and I have little or no control over that are terrifying. The panic starts on the days off just knowing I must return to work only easing up when the last shift of the week is over. But again, I am already thinking about the following week before I even arrive home.

I have taken CBT several times. While the first time was fairly successful, things fell away and spiraled again the moment I returned to work.
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Default Jan 23, 2019 at 03:57 PM
  #7
I am very new here but have had G.A.D on and off for 20+ years, my worst (to date) nearly a year ago where I couldnt get out of bed & had nothing but water for 2 periods of 9 days duration. I do also have depression, and previously I have seen a Psychiatrist - good, Psychotherapist - terrible and a CBT counsellor - Incredible! (I'm obviously not condeming all Psychotherapists - just the awful one I was unlucky enough to c hoose at that time.

CBT was fantastic, I didn't unearth any deep, dark causes and I still do not know what triggers my G.A.D but when it hits, it hits hard and fast for no apparent, conscious reason I can find. However CBT did facilitate my understanding of some issues, that prior to this therapy I would not have consciously recognised as 'issues.' Im now in training to become a Psychtherapist / counsellor myself.

For WishfulThinker66, I deeply empathise, & whereas I appreciate it is not at all easy, if your job is leaving you in what seems to be an almost permanent state of anxiety, do you have any options to change jobs? take some time off? For you and darkside8 a few years back I learnt a couple of simple tricks that really helped my anxiety levels & persistence.

1. from CBT: you cant control or change the things that cause your anxiety, but you can control your own emotions, thoughts & behaviours: the next time a 'trigger' arises down automatically follow the same pattern you usually do. Stop, think to yourself ok 'X' has happened / is going to happen & there's nothing I can do to prevent that, acknowledge and accept that fact first. But then say to yourself ' I can, and I will control how it makes me feel and behave.. almost like counting to 10. My CBT counsellor called it the ABC: A - Action - the trigger of your anxiety (no control.) B - Behaviour - what do I do / think when 'X' happens? (you have full control over this,) and C - Consequences - try your best to say ok, I cant control this - it will happen regardless, so why should I worry about it if theres nothing I can do to stop the 'A'ction occuring.

2. Briefly, I try to put a mental 2 column list 'in front of my eyes. On one side, your choice are the things said, done, going to happen to me today that I cannot control, maybe someone cuts you up in the car or jumps a queue etc. I cant control these so im not going to worry about them. 2nd column Things I can control My reactions, thoughts feelings. someone knocks into me on the street - I cant control that but I can pause, think and control my actions / reactions - e.g Instead of confronting, I just let it go... I hope im not 'teaching either of you to 'suck eggs' as we say, but these 2 simple exercises work for me and the more I do the calmer I am. Best of Luck and Good Wishes to you both.

Last edited by CANDC; Jan 23, 2019 at 07:57 PM.. Reason: paragraph breaks
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Default Jan 26, 2019 at 09:57 AM
  #8
I only wish I knew the answer for I would be first in line to get it.

I have been in therapy three times including what goes on in my psychiatrist's office. In these cases I have recognised as somewhat being Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) based. A lot of learning to recognise automatic thoughts and negative thinking styles. BUT, at no time have we actually delved into the very reasons for my thinking negatively. They are aware that I have a lot of traumas in my life and I have in fact been diagnosed with PTSD but it seems they have all shyed away from actually discussing it. Now, I am at a point where my Anxiety has been all consuming and disabling. I have had enough. I need to get to the heart of my problems. Thus, when I return to seeing my psychologist and psychiatrist I plan to say flat out, "Let's stop beating around the bush and get on with it."
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Default Jan 26, 2019 at 10:07 AM
  #9
You can do this, WishfulThinker66! I think discussing this with your psychiatrist and psychologist is a good idea. I hope you'll get the help you need. It will take time, so tryto be patient. Try to hang on. I hope you'll feel better soon. Feel free to PM me anytime. I'm always available if you need to talk. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you
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Default Jan 26, 2019 at 10:10 AM
  #10
I had one therapist tell me that it's not often but sometimes a client or patient will actually have a physiological cause to their anxiety. I have the pleasure of being in that category.
I do have an underlying neurological illness. Sometimes my panic attacks are from my body feeling run down, sometimes it's actual environmental emotional stress triggers. Walking on Eggshells being one of them.
Hopefully you can find the therapist that helps you through yours.
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Default Jan 31, 2019 at 01:16 AM
  #11
It will all depend on why you are seeking therapy and on your specific therapist. It does usually help to identify a cause of a problem in order to deal with or treat it. Sometimes they just try to give you a different perspective on your issues. Try going into therapy open-minded and follow your therapists treatment plan. If things don't work out, you can always seek a different therapist.

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Default Feb 02, 2019 at 05:51 PM
  #12
Quote:
Originally Posted by darkside8 View Post
Anyone here who has been, or are in, therapy for generalised anxiety disorder (or even social anxiety), did you have to work with your T on exploring the causes before working on recovering? How important was that? Had the reasons for your anxiety, when explored, taken you to some dark and deep places of discomfort? If so, despite how hard it must have been to discuss it, did you find that was extremely important for recovery?
Anyone not find a deep, hidden reason why and the causes of it were more the stresses of education and work, and wanting everything to be perfect?
lease try to provide as much detail if you can, thanks ever so much!
I suffer from GAD and quite a few other anxiety related conditions.

When I met with my therapist, we did go over the causes of my anxiety. I can understand where you may be coming from in regards to being intimidated with the process of going over the causes. I certainly was... I even tried cancelling the appointment the morning of the appointment. No kidding, my therapist called me back and she right away why I did it. She explained that this process is perfectly normal and could even be empowering to a degree. Almost like owning your condition.

She was exactly right. It went really well for me. I would recommend that you trust your therapist, share your concerns, and dive on in if it feels right.

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