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Default Jan 27, 2020 at 03:45 PM
  #1
I wasn’t let go or fired at all recently, but I have heard other people discus how they have been let go and mention how they wish they could just ask for the real reason if the reason they were given seems fishy or doesn’t add up. I totally understand that just about every state, other than Montana I think, is employment at will so they can fire you for any reason or no reason.

But I’ve still wondered if it is okay to ask for a real reason just so you can have peace of mind that either it had nothing to do with you or if it did, then know what you did wrong so you have the ability to prevent that mistake in the future. Do you think it’s okay to ask? I think you can as long as it is professional and there is a desire to learn from it rather than getting angry and lashing out. Lashing out gets you no where which I would never do in that situation.

Have you ever asked an employer for the real reason you were let go if things didn’t add up or seemed sketchy? I was once let go as a sub four years ago after only working there for a month. I have since moved on and have been working at another school district for four years now. Due to previous conversations, it makes me wonder if I could have asked for a reason since the reason they gave me didn’t add up. Most likely they just wanted to get rid of me.

Do you think it’s a good idea or bad idea to ask? I wouldn’t ask them now, it’s been four years, but I was just wondering in the event that I ever found myself in that situation again. Hopefully not, but you never know. When it happened, it was sudden and without warning and I unfortunately had to let some teachers that really liked me know I would not be returning due to personal reasons when they called and asked me to sub on days that other paras would be out, not knowing what had happened. A real shame. So what are your thoughts? Just wondered.
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Default Jan 27, 2020 at 04:21 PM
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If they are of any size, most likely, their lawyers have instructed them not to get into it with terminated employees. They have a manual and they go by it, given the litigation climate here.

If it's a little employer, then sure, I don't see why you couldn't ask in a non-threatening way if they had any suggestions for you for your next place of employee. Just my two cents.

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Default Jan 27, 2020 at 04:28 PM
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Originally Posted by bpcyclist View Post
If they are of any size, most likely, their lawyers have instructed them not to get into it with terminated employees. They have a manual and they go by it, given the litigation climate here.

If it's a little employer, then sure, I don't see why you couldn't ask in a non-threatening way if they had any suggestions for you for your next place of employee. Just my two cents.
Yeah makes sense. I agree. Yeah I wouldn’t ask my old employer now, it’s been four years and would seem weird and they may even not know what I’m talking about. But yeah this is good to know if this were to ever happen again.
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Default Jan 27, 2020 at 07:28 PM
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Definitely ask. If they care at all, they'll tell you. If they're a huge corporate blah-blah they might blow you off - but you have every right to ask! If your emplyer was a small business, they should be decent enough to discuss your question.

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Default Jan 27, 2020 at 07:37 PM
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Definitely ask. If they care at all, they'll tell you. If they're a huge corporate blah-blah they might blow you off - but you have every right to ask! If your emplyer was a small business, they should be decent enough to discuss your question.
I agree with you.
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Trophy Jan 28, 2020 at 07:19 AM
  #6
I’ve never been let go from a job but if that happened I definitely would need to know why. And in most cases people do know why. Unless it’s a lay off due to cutting budget and the only reason is that they had to do massive lay off. In my experience with people who were let go, they always knew why.

Now in your situation as you weren’t employee of the district and were subbing, you weren’t really fired by them as you didn’t directly work for them. I’d see how they sometimes wouldn’t tell you.

You are just being put on “don’t come back” list. Yes it is always sudden and without warning. You don’t work for the district so they wouldn’t give warnings. If that happens you likely wouldn’t know the reason in order to protect staff who asked to exclude you from sub list for that building. Likely teachers you subbed for or office employees or even parents. Then administration makes a decision based on that.

You can try to remember what transpired at that time and what events led to this outcome
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Default Jan 28, 2020 at 07:50 AM
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I've only been let go once but I was told "its just not working out". I asked why and the boss of the law firm kept repeating it. I overheard some things though and I knew it was because of my weight and that i talked loud on the phone.

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Default Jan 28, 2020 at 09:03 AM
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I've only been let go once but I was told "its just not working out". I asked why and the boss of the law firm kept repeating it. I overheard some things though and I knew it was because of my weight and that i talked loud on the phone.
Yeah that sounds unfair that you were let go for that reason. Sometimes it can be unfair.
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Default Jan 28, 2020 at 09:21 AM
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I’ve never been let go from a job but if that happened I definitely would need to know why. And in most cases people do know why. Unless it’s a lay off due to cutting budget and the only reason is that they had to do massive lay off. In my experience with people who were let go, they always knew why.

Now in your situation as you weren’t employee of the district and were subbing, you weren’t really fired by them as you didn’t directly work for them. I’d see how they sometimes wouldn’t tell you.

You are just being put on “don’t come back” list. Yes it is always sudden and without warning. You don’t work for the district so they wouldn’t give warnings. If that happens you likely wouldn’t know the reason in order to protect staff who asked to exclude you from sub list for that building. Likely teachers you subbed for or office employees or even parents. Then administration makes a decision based on that.

You can try to remember what transpired at that time and what events led to this outcome
Yeah when you’re a sub, you’re just considered a fill in employee, not a regular one. So yeah it is much easier to be told to not come back. Honestly everything appeared fine and one morning I went to look at jobs for the day and saw that my account wouldn’t work. I called, thinking it was a technical issue and I was told I was not wanted back anymore. Since, according to what I was told, one school out of the eight I would sub at decided they didn’t want me back. And it was my favorite one to sub at too. Very sudden and suspicious.

Makes me think they just simply decided they didn’t like me or something and didn’t want me there. But yeah, oh well, those things happen. I have since moved on, I’ve just wondered about the whole asking for a reason to being let go if it happened again. I hope not but you never know. I’ve been at my current district for four years and no problems so I don’t worry as much as I used to. I still worry sometimes and I’m more cautious but I don’t obsess over it and not as paranoid about it as I once was.
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Default Feb 02, 2020 at 09:55 PM
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Do you think it’s a good idea or bad idea to ask? I wouldn’t ask them now, it’s been four years, but I was just wondering in the event that I ever found myself in that situation again.
With substitute teaching, substitutes are considered disposable. You're there to fill-in for the day for their teacher. There are many reasons why substitute teachers are excluded from schools -- poor classroom management is the #1 reason why a school would ban a substitute teacher. The #2 reason is that the substitute behaved inappropriately with a student or class of students.

Employers usually tell an employee why they are being terminated. That's par for the course.

Since you said it was your favorite school, I can understand why it would bother you 4 years later why they suddenly excluded you from subbing for them. Maybe you said something to a student and that student reported you.

Or, maybe the principal thought you didn't have good classroom management skills. It's really hard to say. You'd have to contact the school to find out. If doing that will ease your mind, then just send the principal an email.
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Default Feb 03, 2020 at 08:54 AM
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With substitute teaching, substitutes are considered disposable. You're there to fill-in for the day for their teacher. There are many reasons why substitute teachers are excluded from schools -- poor classroom management is the #1 reason why a school would ban a substitute teacher. The #2 reason is that the substitute behaved inappropriately with a student or class of students.

Employers usually tell an employee why they are being terminated. That's par for the course.

Since you said it was your favorite school, I can understand why it would bother you 4 years later why they suddenly excluded you from subbing for them. Maybe you said something to a student and that student reported you.

Or, maybe the principal thought you didn't have good classroom management skills. It's really hard to say. You'd have to contact the school to find out. If doing that will ease your mind, then just send the principal an email.
Yeah I can see that. Yep, as a substitute, you are definitely disposable. I was not and still am not a teacher, I’m just a paraprofessional which helps with special needs kids so for the paras, we don’t have as much control over classroom management since it’s not our room. But yeah, still, yeah it can be anything. I don’t talk to students beyond school work related topics, I am not there to be friends with them. That’s inappropriate and unprofessional.

I’m just there to help. But yeah, anything can happen when you’re just a sub, even at other jobs where you’re just filling in for someone else. I’ve heard similar things happening to those who are just fill ins for employees at restaurants as well. So yeah, it can happen to anyone. And I don’t obsess over it, I’m just more cautious now. Yeah most likely it was something very small and insignificant but still just wanted to get rid of me.
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Default Feb 03, 2020 at 05:19 PM
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IMHO, there is usually the "real" reason and then there is the politically correct reason and most companies will give you the politically correct version every time. I've seen people get let go due to them having an illness, and they just say stuff like "your position has been eliminated" because they can't legally get rid of someone for their illness and since they did indeed get rid of the position (by renaming it and giving the spot to someone else) there's not much you can do. Same thing with references. I've always only been able to give dates of employment and salary if the employee/former employee agreed to the salary part. I've had people try to get more information from me but I tell them my job is on the line if I tell any more than that. I don't think most companies will give you the real reason but maybe I am jaded.

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Default Feb 03, 2020 at 10:22 PM
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IMHO, there is usually the "real" reason and then there is the politically correct reason and most companies will give you the politically correct version every time. I've seen people get let go due to them having an illness, and they just say stuff like "your position has been eliminated" because they can't legally get rid of someone for their illness and since they did indeed get rid of the position (by renaming it and giving the spot to someone else) there's not much you can do. Same thing with references. I've always only been able to give dates of employment and salary if the employee/former employee agreed to the salary part. I've had people try to get more information from me but I tell them my job is on the line if I tell any more than that. I don't think most companies will give you the real reason but maybe I am jaded.
Yeah exactly. From what I’ve read, the ending of an employment is similar to the ending of a relationship or friendship. In both cases, it involves pointing fingers and not giving a real reason as to why things need to end if it is not on good terms.
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Default Feb 04, 2020 at 11:51 AM
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If I was fired/let go and didn't know the reason, that would likely make me feel very uncomfortable. I have been let go from some of my past jobs, but I was either told a reason that I could understand, or I just knew. I have quit more jobs than I was fired from. As for the ones I was terminated from, some of the reasons were absence (a lot), behavior, supervisor conflicts, no more work to be done, and in one case the owner was clearly mentally unwell and accused me of ruining all of the computer systems (which was totally ridiculous). In the last case, I was just a temp between college years. The temp agency told me that the owner was irrational and that her husband said I did nothing wrong.

If you have been told some reason you don't believe, I'm not quite sure that anyone would tell you the real reason, unless a former work colleague knows and is willing to tell you.
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Default Feb 04, 2020 at 02:17 PM
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I did that once, and got a vicious, nasty, accussing response about everything he disliked about me. Best not to ask.

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Default Feb 04, 2020 at 02:57 PM
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If I was fired/let go and didn't know the reason, that would likely make me feel very uncomfortable. I have been let go from some of my past jobs, but I was either told a reason that I could understand, or I just knew. I have quit more jobs than I was fired from. As for the ones I was terminated from, some of the reasons were absence (a lot), behavior, supervisor conflicts, no more work to be done, and in one case the owner was clearly mentally unwell and accused me of ruining all of the computer systems (which was totally ridiculous). In the last case, I was just a temp between college years. The temp agency told me that the owner was irrational and that her husband said I did nothing wrong.

If you have been told some reason you don't believe, I'm not quite sure that anyone would tell you the real reason, unless a former work colleague knows and is willing to tell you.
Oh wow, I’m sorry that happened. For the last case, it was probably for the best that you no longer worked for someone who was mentally unstable. Honestly, I would have quit if I was in that position if I found a new job quick enough. I would have feared for my reputation. And I agree, they will not always tell you.
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Default Feb 04, 2020 at 02:58 PM
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I did that once, and got a vicious, nasty, accussing response about everything he disliked about me. Best not to ask.
Oh wow, that was unprofessional of him to respond so rudely. Could have been honest but professional about it. Yeah it can be risky.
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