FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
Veteran Member
annoyedgrunt84
has no updates.
Member Since: Nov 2014
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 720
634 hugs
given |
#1
I had a huge argument with my sister after Thanksgiving dinner, now the whole family is just acting like nothing happened. I was yelling so loud and I am so ashamed of myself. I apologized to her but I am sitting alone crying now I hate myself.
__________________ "We can hear the night watchman click his flashlight ask himself if it's him or them that's insane"- Bob Dylan 20 mg Citalopram |
Reply With Quote |
*Beth*, Open Eyes, Turtle_Rider, WovenGalaxy
|
*Beth*
|
Veteran Member
annoyedgrunt84
has no updates.
Member Since: Nov 2014
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 720
634 hugs
given |
#2
My stomach is churning and I feel sick, I don’t want to be the way I am. I’m such a failure.
__________________ "We can hear the night watchman click his flashlight ask himself if it's him or them that's insane"- Bob Dylan 20 mg Citalopram |
Reply With Quote |
*Beth*
|
Veteran Member
annoyedgrunt84
has no updates.
Member Since: Nov 2014
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 720
634 hugs
given |
#3
I need to let things roll of my back, but I think that’s how I got so angry. I feel like I let people push me around until I build up so much frustration and anger that I lash out.
__________________ "We can hear the night watchman click his flashlight ask himself if it's him or them that's insane"- Bob Dylan 20 mg Citalopram |
Reply With Quote |
*Beth*
|
Elder
Thunder Bow
is a Medicine Man
Member Since: Sep 2012
Location: Arizona
Posts: 5,630
3 hugs
given |
#4
Don't put yourself down over this. You got angry for a reason. What triggered you?
|
Reply With Quote |
Veteran Member
annoyedgrunt84
has no updates.
Member Since: Nov 2014
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 720
634 hugs
given |
#5
I feel pushed around, like people expect that I won’t fight back. I bottle everything up until it comes out in a rage, she also touched on my insecurities and I feel like she knew she was doing it was what really set me off.
__________________ "We can hear the night watchman click his flashlight ask himself if it's him or them that's insane"- Bob Dylan 20 mg Citalopram |
Reply With Quote |
Turtle_Rider
|
*Beth*
|
Veteran Member
annoyedgrunt84
has no updates.
Member Since: Nov 2014
Location: Oklahoma
Posts: 720
634 hugs
given |
#6
I’m very insecure which makes it very hard for me to push back when I disagree without becoming angry.
__________________ "We can hear the night watchman click his flashlight ask himself if it's him or them that's insane"- Bob Dylan 20 mg Citalopram |
Reply With Quote |
*Beth*
|
Legendary
MickeyCheeky
My echo is the only voice coming back
Member Since: Jun 2016
Location: Italy
Posts: 11,817
(SuperPoster!)
38.4k hugs
given |
#7
i am so Sorry this has Happened. Please try to think about something else. i know it's hard but just try. SEnding many Safe, warm hugs to BOTH You, @annoyedgrunt84, Your Family, Your FriEnds And ALL of Your Loved Ones! Keep fighting And keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!
|
Reply With Quote |
catches the flowers
*Beth*
is practicing healthy breathing for brain, mind,
body, spirit.
Member Since: Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
(SuperPoster!)
23.7k hugs
given |
#8
Your insight is excellent. If you want to, you know where you can do (kind to yourself) work.
__________________ |
Reply With Quote |
Guest
Anonymous43372
has no updates.
Edit
Posts: n/a
|
#9
Quote:
In one instance, she pulled aside a former boyfriend when I was in another room, and told him that he was crazy to be dating me, that she felt I was cuckoo, and other things. He broke up with me literally a few days later and told me it was because of the information my sister shared with him about me, that I hadn’t shared with him yet. What I have learned over the years, is that I no longer introduce friends or boyfriends to my family anymore. Sometimes that stalls out the relationships from continuing, and sometimes it hasn’t and I’m still involved with people because they choose to respect that I have these new boundaries with my family members, who intentionally treat me like garbage and always will. You have the decision to make about your situation. Do you institute new boundaries or do you continue to put yourself in the line of fire like you do with your sister, where she intentionally will gaslight and trigger you because she knows you are vulnerable and will react b/c you care about what she thinks, more than you care about your own boundaries. I think you need to stop reacting to your sister and other family members’ triggering behavior. That is probably the hardest thing but it’s the only thing that works. You have to either stop interacting with your family, or, still interact with them, but when they trigger you, just don’t react anymore. That’s why they put you down; because they want the satisfaction of knowing they hurt you. They don’t like or respect you, or they wouldn’t treat you that way. No one can change them for you. You can’t change them either. You can only change how you react to them. I hope that helps. |
|
Reply With Quote |
Marie123
|
Elder
Thunder Bow
is a Medicine Man
Member Since: Sep 2012
Location: Arizona
Posts: 5,630
3 hugs
given |
#10
We all must own our feelings. What was the argument about?
|
Reply With Quote |