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AzulOscuro
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Smile Jan 29, 2019 at 06:28 PM
  #1
The better proof of the existence of intelligent life in other planets is that they don’t dare to visit us. In other words, they avoid us as hell. I don’t blame them. Lol!

People often wonder what kind of world we are gonna leave for our children but why don’t they ever wonder what kind of children they are gonna leave in the world?

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Default Jan 29, 2019 at 07:53 PM
  #2
If you shake a baby, it might poop its pants. If you shake an adult, it might punch you in the face. I dislike them equally

Do roosters know that not everyone loves cocking, doodling doo
Er, I take that back- I love roosters no matter how much cocking, doodling they do

Most frustrating part of my life is not being able to open a bag of chips or unscrew a juice bottle - thats a joke
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Default Jan 29, 2019 at 08:10 PM
  #3
You will have to explain to me the one about the rooster. I’m not an English native speaker and I didn’t catch it. But, I know when a joke has to be explained, it’s not a fun joke anymore.

Thanks!

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Default Jan 29, 2019 at 08:14 PM
  #4
sorry, i'm not sure I can explain more than being a close to resemblance to onomatopoeia and my sleep being disturbed by roosters every other morning

your jokes are much more profound
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AzulOscuro
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Default Jan 29, 2019 at 08:19 PM
  #5
I understand now. It was a onomatopoeic sense. Again, my English doesn’t allow me to catch it so far.
Thanks for your clarification.
Yes, mine ones are ironical but any kind of humor is welcome here. So, don’t hesitate you.
Btw, your signature about all these encouragement words and ending in Nice butt or so, it’s hilarious. Lol!

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Default Jan 29, 2019 at 08:26 PM
  #6
id be a smoker if I knew where to put the butts - pun intended
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Default Jan 29, 2019 at 08:33 PM
  #7
I’m learning a lot after looking at the fictionary. Thanks! :-)

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Default Feb 02, 2019 at 07:39 AM
  #8
This is a jersey joke:
Where do you find a lost PA driver?
In the left lane.

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Default Feb 02, 2019 at 03:14 PM
  #9
This is more of a funny story but it’s also kind of a joke.

My manager at my job is a jerk and this morning he wasn’t around for a couple hours, so I was wondering if he had left. My coworker was passing by and I said to her:

Where did the manager go?

And she said

“To hell.”

It was pretty funny.

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Smile Feb 08, 2019 at 01:26 PM
  #10
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mountaindewed View Post
This is more of a funny story but it’s also kind of a joke.

My manager at my job is a jerk and this morning he wasn’t around for a couple hours, so I was wondering if he had left. My coworker was passing by and I said to her:

Where did the manager go?

And she said

“To hell.”

It was pretty funny.
Indeed. It’s hilarious.
Only problem is what if he is not admitted even in hell. Lol

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Default Feb 08, 2019 at 02:18 PM
  #11
A couple of jokes. Feel free to add more!
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Default Feb 08, 2019 at 03:10 PM
  #12
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Originally Posted by AzulOscuro View Post
Indeed. It’s hilarious.
Only problem is what if he is not admitted even in hell. Lol
Yeah I wouldn’t be surprised. This guy is a straight up ***. But he’s not consistently rude to me, so it’s tolerable. But he just hands me stuff then walks away without saying anything. I know what to do with the things he gives me but I still find it rude for him to be completely silent and ignore me. Today I was walking back with my trash bin and he just comes up and puts a bag of trash on top of it and walks off. No thank you or anything. Just walks off. It drives me insane. Yet the other week he gave me a high five and an enthusiastic thank you for doing a good job.

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Default Feb 08, 2019 at 03:38 PM
  #13
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Originally Posted by Mountaindewed View Post
Yeah I wouldn’t be surprised. This guy is a straight up ***. But he’s not consistently rude to me, so it’s tolerable. But he just hands me stuff then walks away without saying anything. I know what to do with the things he gives me but I still find it rude for him to be completely silent and ignore me. Today I was walking back with my trash bin and he just comes up and puts a bag of trash on top of it and walks off. No thank you or anything. Just walks off. It drives me insane. Yet the other week he gave me a high five and an enthusiastic thank you for doing a good job.
Well, if he gave you a 5 high is a good signal. It’s not all lost. :-)

Maybe, we shouldn’t be talking here about him. What if he is also here in the forum, following your steps. Lol!

Talking seriously now, there are people like this everywhere. I have walk pass with some of my coworkers and I kept with the good morning or hello in my mouth. Or saying it, without receiving a greeting back.

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Default Feb 11, 2019 at 09:29 PM
  #14
This is a gross joke my doctor made today.

He was flushing my ear and this infection and stuff was just pouring out. He said

“It looks like someone is having a bowel movement.”

It was so funny despite the pain I was in.

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Default Feb 12, 2019 at 01:55 AM
  #15
Gym jokes

How come treadmills don’t make flour?
Why don’t excerise bikes have two wheels?
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Default Feb 12, 2019 at 03:46 AM
  #16
A couple of jokes. Feel free to add more!
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AzulOscuro
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Smile Feb 12, 2019 at 06:22 PM
  #17
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Gym jokes

How come treadmills don’t make flour?
Why don’t excerise bikes have two wheels?
I don’t know it. Go ahead, shoot!

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Default Feb 15, 2019 at 12:20 PM
  #18
A couple of jokes. Feel free to add more!

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Default Feb 15, 2019 at 12:23 PM
  #19
A couple of jokes. Feel free to add more!

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Default Feb 15, 2019 at 12:24 PM
  #20
Quote:
Originally Posted by AzulOscuro View Post
I don’t know it. Go ahead, shoot!
I don't get it.

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