Our building project is cancelled!

Our contractors found a water main and an electricity main running between the two properties. Why they hadn't discovered that before commencing is beyond me.

The construction company refunded me which is good. But I think it would be better move further up the coast as there will be a nice Georgian property on the market in a couple of month's time.

It's a disappointment, but these things happen.

I hope they get that fixed soon, @Access Denied

(((safe hugs)))

How sweet of you - and thank you @Lilly2 but I've decided to turf the gap between the properties, sell them seperately and start searching for a larger home with a nice walled garden. This time a bit more inland so we're not so wind battered. Sea views are all very nice, but get a roaring gale and there'd be no sleep at night!

If need be I can extend the lease of our apartment rental. This will be useful while we search. That way we'll always have a home to go to, and the home's furniture put into storage. I think that would be the less stressful that way. Also, we can't have those mains water pipes moved. Best left where they are!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Access Denied How sweet of you - and thank you @Lilly2 but I've decided to turf the gap between the properties, sell them seperately and start searching for a larger home with a nice walled garden. This time a bit more inland so we're not so wind battered. Sea views are all very nice, but get a roaring gale and there'd be no sleep at night! If need be I can extend the lease of our apartment rental. This will be useful while we search. That way we'll always have a home to go to, and the home's furniture put into storage. I think that would be the less stressful that way. Also, we can't have those mains water pipes moved. Best left where they are!

I hope you find a better and safer home @Access Denied

I'm not a homeowner (yet), but I'm learning about the process very slowly. Some things that I consider are
...landscape and terrain (is it on a potential sinkhole, in a flood zone, in a landslide zone, in an earthquake zone, near potential tsunamis, etc.)
...weather conditions and climate (is it in a tornado alley, near hurricanes, near blizzard zones, etc.)
...neighborhood (is it safe, is it expanding, is it urban, is it suburban, is it rural, is it feasible to travel to/from, is it a ghost town, is it near wild animals, is it near bug problems, is it near facilities that produce hazardous waste, is it near homeless shelters, is it diverse or segregated, is it prejudice or not, are the neighbors friendly, are there neighborhood watch systems in effect, etc.)
...property taxes (if applicable)
...dangerous bugs, infectious disease, water contamination potentials, etc.
...has the house ever had termites?
...has the house ever had a deceased human body inside?
...what were the previous owners or tenants like (e.g., was there domestic violence involved from the previous tenant, or gang activity, or white-collared crime, or a famous person - all potential risk factors for stalking)
...is the landscape around the house too shady and dark, which makes it vulnerable to breakins, burglaries, home invasions, etc.?
...has the house ever had infestations of other kinds of bugs, such as bed bugs, lice, roaches, rodents, etc.?
...has the house ever been invaded on its property by bears, wolves, gophers, rats, deer, etc.?
...how old is the house?
...has the house ever had asbestos or lead problems, including lead paint?
...has the house ever had a broken or leaking roof, and was the roof reinforced and repaired?
...has the house ever had any pipe problems, black mold, sewage problems, etc.?
...what were the original specs of the house, and how has it changed over the years?
...what kind of landscaping has been done around the house?
...what are the laws and ordinances in that particular jurisdiction?
...what is the culture like among the people living in that neighborhood?
...what kind of governmental leadership oversees that particular jurisdiction?
...etc.

Compare those answers and more to what your ideal house would look like, and make a decision from there. Figure out what you're willing to compromise, since no area is perfect.

Figure out if the house fits with your lifestyle.

Have fun when scoping out new places, and don't feel rushed. Take your time when finding the right place for you and your family.

Also, when children are involved, see if there are child-friendly (or, in your case, teen-friendly) activities that are safe for your daughter. See if there are good schools in the area, good neighbors with good-mannered kids that are similar in age to your own, openness to LGBTQIA populations in that area (some neighborhoods are more prejudiced than others, in that regard, so be careful and cautious about cultural and systemic factors such as those), etc.

(((safe hugs)))

Happy house hunting!

Hello @Access Denied, I hope everything goes well for you, that you're managing okay. You sound like you may have it under control, which is good. But sending you strength of spirit, nevertheless.

@Lilly2 - that's a very comprehensive, helpful list you've created, which is great, but I believe you've missed something and that's, ghosts. What if the house was a known haunted house? How would you feel about that? Bangs in the night, footsteps up and down the stairs, shadows and apparitions, whispering voices in the other room, oh my goodness gracious me...

Quote:

Originally Posted by mote.of.soul Hello @Access Denied, I hope everything goes well for you, that you're managing okay. You sound like you may have it under control, which is good. But sending you strength of spirit, nevertheless. @Lilly2 - that's a very comprehensive, helpful list you've created, which is great, but I believe you've missed something and that's, ghosts. What if the house was a known haunted house? How would you feel about that? Bangs in the night, footsteps up and down the stairs, shadows and apparitions, whispering voices in the other room, oh my goodness gracious me...

@mote.of.soul - ghosts and haunted houses, hmm... I would probably hire the paranormal squad (including Ghostbusters) to help me detect ghosts. Now, if Casper (the friendly ghost) lived there, I might be okay with that. (I also liked the ghosts depicted in Harry Potter.) But if it's scary haunted, like the kind I've seen on horror films, then no way would I want to move in.

Wow @Lilly2 that is a tremendous list of very good suggestions! I've made a copy of them to keep at home so we can mull over the pros and cons. We won't be living anywhere near that Victorian property with those horrible guys, but we'll bide our time just like you suggested.

What with work and my partner's committments, neither of us are in any hurry. Tonight I extended the lease of our apartment by another two months in case we need it. That lessens our stress.

So many thanks again.

Thank you very much for being so lovely and supportive like Lilly. We are managing very well now.

Tonight I extended the lease of our apartment rental a couple of months, so no stress.

Very welcome @Access Denied. Yes, the less stress the better.

@Lilly2: Haha, yes, a Casper would actually be pretty awesome, I suppose.

Thank you guys.

I hope you find a nice new house to move into. HUGS Kit

Wow, @Access Denied! I bet that is one phone call or text or email or face-to-face convo you were not expecting. And here you maybe imagined you were going to have a little vacation for a few months and then return to the dream home. The water and electricity gods had other plans, apparently. My heart goes out to you.

I'm not sure, this may just be an American saying, but there is an aphorism that goes: If you want to find out how durable your marriage is, just decide to build a house.

I never did that, but I did buy a big house and move our family and that alone was plenty stressful enough for me.

Anyway, sending you positive, calming vibes and house-purchasing support. I'm sure you will sail through it.

Thank you, Kitty. We hope so, too!


Thank you @bpcyclist for your wisom in this difficult situation. I appreciat your insight and suggestions.


It's certainly not going to be easy, but we've decided to not only have a packing service and removals, but also an unpacking service. These packing/unpacking services are not cheap when VAT is added, but neither of us will have the time or the energy to unpack all our crockery etc, because it will all take massive amounts of time and body strain heaving boxes, unpacking and placing items where they should go. Doing this may mean an estimate of £1,500 or more plus VAT, but worth it. Once we find and agree on a property that the three of like and our friends agree with our choice, we won't be moving again.

I've lived in this town all my life with my parents until their tragic deaths earlier this year. Leaving their lovely home will be a tearful wrench, I know that and my daughter also. But we have to be practical as that water main and electricity main pipes are not to be moved. They supply our neighbours and surrounding properties as these pipes junction off from the main coast road. Better they are left, turfed over and we move on.

Laura and I would have loved a small vacation such as a Scandinavian cruise where we'd not have to cook. But that isn't going to happen and anyway, despite being off sick for many months, I haven't clocked up enough holiday days except for a lazy Christmas week, and even then I may be asked to help at the 'centre in the run-up to New Year.

One great bit of news today is my Chief has put me on a 3 day week. Our opening hours are from 08:00 to 18:30 and don't close for lunch. I get to work 12 hours which is usual. Today I had a morning surgery and in the afternoon a bunch of telephone consultations, all pre-booked by our marvellous receptionists. The 'phone consults could be anything from 5 to 10minutes max, but as Duty Doctor today I had the absolute maximum of 60 patients. I'm tired out.

Thanks @bpcyclist I forgot to add that no, I didn't welcome that phone message and the email that accompanied it. It made me cry. I hate disappointment. We all do. We expect everything to go tiddly-pom and then it all goes to ****. I even got a parking ticket when parked on a double yellow line to grab some quick groceries. I'll just have to pay the fine because unless visiting a patient, it would be dishonest to contest it just because I'm a doctor.

Oh well, bum and sod is what I say. That's life.

As of today Laura and I will be taking time off until Tuesday evening because we are house hunting.

The house next door is sold (subject to contract), is empty. Realistically priced, if the sale goes through it will release a nice lot of equity. That means we could go ahead and buy one of these properties that we have listed. My partner says this makes sound financial sense. My daughter and I agree.

So far we are booked to view 6 properties (my partner has just closed a call a few minutes ago). Each property have lovely big gardens with trees and mature shrubs, two with big greenhouses. All 5 also having decent size conservatories and beautifully built bespoke kitchens in addition to five bedrooms, and one even has a loft conversion.

I asked the estate agents to look out for detached properties only, minimum 4 bedrooms with ensuite bathrooms. It's amazing how many are within commute distance of work and the shops.

Laura and I are feeling stressed, and this is the reason I won't be in PC for these few days. Naturally we are keen to buy a property as soon as possible so we can settle. We would contract a full packing and unpacking service, and although the prices for these special services will be high, it will dramatically reduce stress not having to unpack. An unpacking service will help towards building in our relationship.

My daughter is enthusiastic; I'm desperately wanting to keep her happy. There is even a very nice school close to 2 of the properties, and she's preferring a school to home-schooling so as to make friends her age. Who wouldn't? She's lonely.

So until late Tuesday evening, cheerio for now. Please wish us well.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Access Denied As of today Laura and I will be taking time off until Tuesday evening because we are house hunting. The house next door is sold (subject to contract), is empty. Realistically priced, if the sale goes through it will release a nice lot of equity. That means we could go ahead and buy one of these properties that we have listed. My partner says this makes sound financial sense. My daughter and I agree. So far we are booked to view 6 properties (my partner has just closed a call a few minutes ago). Each property have lovely big gardens with trees and mature shrubs, two with big greenhouses. All 5 also having decent size conservatories and beautifully built bespoke kitchens in addition to five bedrooms, and one even has a loft conversion. I asked the estate agents to look out for detached properties only, minimum 4 bedrooms with ensuite bathrooms. It's amazing how many are within commute distance of work and the shops. Laura and I are feeling stressed, and this is the reason I won't be in PC for these few days. Naturally we are keen to buy a property as soon as possible so we can settle. We would contract a full packing and unpacking service, and although the prices for these special services will be high, it will dramatically reduce stress not having to unpack. An unpacking service will help towards building in our relationship. My daughter is enthusiastic; I'm desperately wanting to keep her happy. There is even a very nice school close to 2 of the properties, and she's preferring a school to home-schooling so as to make friends her age. Who wouldn't? She's lonely. So until late Tuesday evening, cheerio for now. Please wish us well.

(((safe hugs))) I wish you well on your time off and with your house hunting. Moving and house hunting are so stressful, indeed, and so I hope that you are able to find some fun in all that stress. When I moved across states, I was stressed to the max (still am with adjustments involved with relocating), but I enjoyed decorating my new home, meeting new neighbors, and reinventing myself.

It sounds like you have a lot of wonderful things going for you, too. Having Laura and your daughter, Juni, by your side in all this sounds like good support!

Have a wonderful weekend!

This afternoon we found a splendid Georgian mansion of 6 bedrooms plus a loft conversion that was very carefully restyored to its original condition.

The garden is very big, cotaining walnut trees though these are dormant for the season, an oak and an ash tree, and also rare and very old Mulberry tree which the vendors said fruits. The garden contains mature shrubs, a beautiful camelia I saw and ceanothus lilacs of considerable size.

The entire plot is walled throughout, is 3ft thick and beautifully lined with Sussex flint, an exceptionally fine example of British craftsmanship.

The house has 2 reception rooms one of which can be used as a dining room. The lounge which is partially lined with books on oak shelving is enormous. We are well pleased with the kitchen, central to it is a big range made by a well known French company; its name escapes me.

Full gas central heating throughout, the lounge has an antique pale blue wood stove whose enammelled pipe runs through the upper rooms, adding to their warmth. Simply put, this Georgain mansion is beautiful though costly. The drive winds around fir trees that stop nosy people from seeing the property and those Sussex flint walls have been fitted with high wrought iron gates. Hopefully those will keep any riffraff out.

We made a sensible offer which was accepted. A full buildings survey will commence in the middle of next week. If our conveyancer gets moving as promised, we should be able to move before January 2020 is out. With good fortune we may even be able to complete before Christmas. The thought of having a 10ft Christmas tree in the oak floored hall would be incredible.

I wish to thank everyone who have supported me on this topic. I thank you very much indeed.

Gosh, what a shock! But so glad you found somewhere wonderful. I also live in the same town I grew up in, and wouldn't want to leave. And on the coast, but inland. BTW telephone triage is great for patients but tough on staff and a very different type of medicine to practice. Do get some pastoral support from the LMC if you can. Hugs and blessings!

@Little Cat thank you for your suggestions because tomorrow I will be seeking counselling from where you mentioned. I really do need their pastoral support. Also there is a Chaplain who is a good friend of mine, so I'll visit hiom tomorrow, too.

Yes, I am relieved for finding that lovely Georgian house, my small family also. Now we are going to wait things out, but in the meantime next week, get our furniture stored by the same removals people we'll be using. Hopefully this will take a big burden off us having to store our stuff ourselves, because my back aches, and I sense I might have a cold coming on!

Latest news is the Georgian property we intended buying, fell through. The vendors couldn't find a property suitable for their family needs, so they pulled out. This caused us a lot of hassle until an estate agent phoned offering a Grade II Listed, 7 bedroom manor house which is situated a busy commuter run of about half an hour away. It might mean I'll have to move to another worlplace, but we'll see. Our country roads are much smaller than in America or France, so the commute might take longer if we're stuck behind a tractor, or a truck full of oinkers. Extra typical, the weather would tip down on us, freezing rain and all!

We viewed the property and were very pleased. It had a beautifully restored barn, admirable Medieval carpentry and craftmanship, but with carefully restored additional rooms from the 17th and 19th centuries. The beams throughout are built from 17th and 18th century shipwreck wood, massive things, and the property also has another two barns and outbuildings perfect for restoration. The manor house and barns / outhouses is positioned in 12 acres of dense woodland. It will be lovely watching wild birds, and hearing owls at night. No street lamps line the road leading to the house. Typical countryside, everywhere would be pitch dark.

The stress came from having to sell all of Dad's cars, my offroader SUV. Thankfully my lovely partner very generously gave the balance out of her previous property sale in France, so all she had to do was transfer money. My daughter is thrilled. Not so thrilled is we have had to dig deep into our funds to be able to afford it. We are, however, extremely grateful the vendors intend keeping some of their furniture and an ancient oak kichen table. All we need is to buy beds, a nice coffee table that is in keeping with the oldness, and a dining table and chairs. I have some sofas and chairs of dad's, his lovely old dresser I can't bring myself to part with, and some antiques of his. That will bring comfort to me because I loved Dad so much.

It has been worrying because I thought we would have had to find another costly rental, but we decided to go all out and buy this manor house. This is because the 12 acres are positioned close to a densely forested area, and along with the restored barn, my partner could set up a survivalist / outdoor site to teach young people how to survive in the event of a climate change catastrophe. Many of these survivalist groups are thriving, and it's good because business can be successful as my partner has been in this type of work for some time. She sold her camp in France which gained a lot of funds, so altogether we can be living in this wild but beautiful area quite soon.

The vendors of their Georgian property kindly refunded me the cost of the chartered surveyor's full buildings survey. That gave me more money for the building's kitty. After all, they can attract other potential buyers because theiir massive survey is already paid for and up to date. It's their bargaining chip, but also our financial gain.

We placed a substantial deposit down on the manor house to avoid 'gazumpers'. The property was promptly taken off the market which was our united stipulation. No other estate agents have it on their books. Once it's been surveyed and its land registry and conveyancing is completed, then we can move in. We have had to be very thorough because the upper end of the housing market attracts business buyers from London, and we can never be too sure.

I dislike driving this Honda Civic that replaced my truck, though it's a good car, naturally I feel vulnerable. But I have to accept that and like it or not, jolly get on with it and swallow down the anxiety. At least we have a new home to go to because the manor house's vendors already have a place in Spain. Au Revoir to them, then. And Hello! us.

Wow - just stumbled across this thread, and wanted to say congratulations and how exciting. You're talking about the type of property that I can only dream of, as it's extremely rare in my country, and certainly impossible in my city. Think of Toronto, as a smaller version of London, but comparable in terms of cost and size of properties.

I totally support your decision to hire people to pack, store, and move and unpack your stuff. In all my moves, I've had friends help me pack, but I get actual movers to do the move - I have too much stuff for the university student days of friends and renting a truck. And when I had a housing gap, storage was slightly expensive but the only real solution. I've always also had friends come and help me unpack and assemble beds as necessary.


Hope everything about the move goes smoothly.

splitimage

I'm glad you visited my thread and thank you for your comments @splitimage

Today has been tramatic. My loving memory of my late father was shattered after I noticed a financial discrepancy in his estate. A sum of £45,000 was unaccounted for, so I went down the accounts to notice it was paid to someone I didn't know. How strange.

I asked my partner to read the accounts again and she agreed, but suggested I recharge Dad's phone to check on his transactions. He ran a stockbroking firm in the City so it was not unusual for him to make financial transactions on his phone. Up came his emails, but first I looked for any photos. Glad I did because there was a selfie of him and another woman. There were many photos. They were of Amalfi in Italy and the woman was attractive.

Not wanting to for breaking my late father's privacy, I went through all his emails. Dad had only had an affair that spanned some 20 years, and I never even guessed. But that £45 thou he'd used to pay off her mortgage, but he never said a word to me. Suspicious that Dad had been up to more that I never knew about, I made an appointment to see his solitor who had acted Executor of Will.

The three of us went including my daughter because she can't legally be left alone at home. While there, I was shown all my late father's accounts. All seemed okay, except for the £45 thou. Just then, my daughter reached across the solitor's desk and fished out a gold embossed green folder from the bottom of the pile.

The solicitor blushed apologising for the oversight. I opened the folder to see my father had a classic car collection with photos, and there were many old but beautiful cars on the papers. I suspected maybe his executor had been embezzling, but I said nothing. I'd make an appointment to consult my own solicitor. I hate the thought of dishonesty, but we have to do these things for our own sakes.

I've been panicky at the thought of having to take out a mortgage to pay off the rest of this manor. It's not cheap by any means. But my partner said that Dad's classic car collection if sold to the right dealer, could more than cover the balance of payments, so I wouldn't need a mortgage. My anxiety lifted. As for the solicitor's oversight, we realised there was a potential fortune in this car collection.

At the end of the consultancy, the solicitor gave me the bill for it. I refused to pay him because of his negligence. He didn't like it, but tough. I thought he wouldn't contest it if he's been hiding something. You don't know unless you scratch an itch. Some itch.

On our way home with the keys to his hangar I never knew about, we made a detour to check out his classic cars. Having pre-checked values on Google, we estimated there was more than enough to pay off the rest of that manor, and then some. It could go towards my daughter's schooling, another financial worry.

I felt bad that my lovely Dad had withheld his affair with his mistress, but glad that my daughter had been keen-eyed to spot that classic car folder. I waned the solicitor that if any of those cars were missing, he's be sure to get a knock on the door by the CID.

If I had to have a mortgage, it would have taken 30 years just to pay the interest off. But now I don't and we are very thankful for my late father's nest egg, even though he had a girlfriend. Oh well, some secrets are meant to go to the grave, I guess. I won't judge Dad because I loved him so much.

This means I can afford to hire those people to pack, store, and move and unpack my stuff. It would have taken months, otherwise.

Sorry for the long post. But what a day!