Don't like talking about my personal issues with family members

Ford Puma · Dec 19, 2019 at 04:57 AM

I agree with the open post completely. While my own position on talking about problems is still work in progress I tend to think its not always a good idea to share with others. Most people mean well when they say talk to me and things like that, but do they understand, that is the big issue. They might think they do, but, do any of us understand mental health truly? It is trial and error, sometimes it will work and sometimes it will not. Personally I say nothing to my brother as he has a mild autism condition meaning his awareness is almost non-existent. The shrink I saw when in the psych ward I told very little to and even the T I saw on and off for 6 years I only half told her things.
As for the constant adds on TV and in awareness campaigns about 'Its good to talk' I do understand they mean well, but sometimes it's just not that simple.

rdgrad15 · Dec 19, 2019 at 09:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

My mom, God rest here really wonderful soul, had this thing where, any time anything kind of hard or, especially, emotionally difficult and raw, would arise, she would stop the conversation and proclaim that: "This is a heavy number."

That meant that the conversation was over. That's how I was raised. No wonder I learned to bottle it all up and chose a profession (surgery) where showing emotion is a huge negative. I was a very good surgeon, if I do say so myself. But it has taken me a long time to become a pretty solid human. I just wasn't given those skills in my youth. I was taught how to achieve. So, that's what I did.

Wow, yeah sounds like she didn’t like it when people confided or talked about their feelings to her. My family is like that and I even know people outside of my family that is like that. Unfortunately it causes us to bottle up our emotions.

rdgrad15 · Dec 19, 2019 at 09:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ford Puma

I agree with the open post completely. While my own position on talking about problems is still work in progress I tend to think its not always a good idea to share with others. Most people mean well when they say talk to me and things like that, but do they understand, that is the big issue. They might think they do, but, do any of us understand mental health truly? It is trial and error, sometimes it will work and sometimes it will not. Personally I say nothing to my brother as he has a mild autism condition meaning his awareness is almost non-existent. The shrink I saw when in the psych ward I told very little to and even the T I saw on and off for 6 years I only half told her things.
As for the constant adds on TV and in awareness campaigns about 'Its good to talk' I do understand they mean well, but sometimes it's just not that simple.

I totally agree. Yeah a lot of people will say it’s good to share and that they would love it if someone confided in them but then when it comes to it, a lot of them will report how uncomfortable and helpless they felts since it was too much and even caused them to pull away. I’ve accidentally driven people away for a bit when I’ve shared my problems in the past.

Some of they truly were just selfish and not good friends since they only complained and talked about themselves but others just felt uncomfortable. The way I found out is as soon as I stopped sharing stuff and even made it look like I was happy again, they began to be comfortable around me again and talk to me more as if nothing happened.

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Don't like talking about my personal issues with family members

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