How are you feeling right now #6?

WishfulThinker66 · Jan 05, 2020 at 10:09 AM

Life Insurance.... I am not feeling so good with myself right now for I have had a really hard time finding life insurance; which, I need on account I am now a home owner. The problem is I keep getting turned down on account of my being bipolar. I can't pass the medical portion of the applications. My broker seems to finally have found one that will only the cost is quadruple that 'normal' people have to pay. I feel sick about this. I feel incredibly pissed at myself about this - not to mention this is a lot more than I had budgeted for. I can't say though it's not bloody fair. The reason is obvious. Being bipolar makes me a higher risk to underwrite. Simply said, I am more likely to die of unatural causes whether by my own direct hand or some risky lifestyle choice. Arrrrgh~

Have Hope · Jan 05, 2020 at 03:47 PM

Terrible and worse off than when I woke up. I should have just stayed in bed. I feel really depressed and hopeless.

Mountaindewed · Jan 05, 2020 at 04:04 PM

I feel sick but also anxious at the same time. So it’s hard to tell what’s real and what’s not. I just took a Xanax so I’ll see how it goes.

Mountaindewed · Jan 05, 2020 at 08:47 PM

It’s Sunday night but I don’t work tomorrow for the first time in awhile. But my body still is reacting as though it’s a work night by having trouble falling asleep. January is such a ****ed up month for me in general.

Sunflower123 · Jan 05, 2020 at 10:35 PM

Emotional.

Jan 06, 2020 at 12:09 AM

Embarrassed that my posting style offends people.

WastingAsparagus · Jan 06, 2020 at 12:13 AM

I don't even know: if I had to say just average.

giddykitty · Jan 06, 2020 at 12:15 AM

i swear i posted in this today! maybe it was another similar thread??

anyway, nothing's changed since then. I'm tired from being sick. bleh!

edit: oh gah! there's a series of this in the Coffeehouse too??!! Oddly enough, I didn't find my post about being sick...lol

Taylor27 · Jan 06, 2020 at 08:44 AM

Anxious this morning

giddykitty · Jan 06, 2020 at 09:42 AM

Found my post about being sick somewhere else random. Anyway,

Feeling hungry. Is that an emotion? Well, it's a feeling! Anyway, gonna go eat

Marylin · Jan 06, 2020 at 01:35 PM

I was watching a video of the bush fires in Australia,animals dying burnt to death,it is horrific,my love,my heart goes out to all the people and animals affected.I
am praying for rain to fall in Australia,I know corporations are to blame for this catastrophe,they created conditions for drought to take hold via chemtrails and geo engineering,weather modification,they dried out the rivers and ushered water from rivers into dams that are now privatized and owned by agricultural corporations.
They banned people from collecting wood from forests so that they would burn,they wanted to make land available for factory farms.God will punish this murder of wildlife and the burning of people's homes,the evil doers will be punished.I am appalled and depressed.I am going to be 100% vegan,I am not eating meat produced in factory farms anymore.

Taylor27 · Jan 06, 2020 at 03:33 PM

Depressed this afternoon

Marylin · Jan 06, 2020 at 06:02 PM

I got chores done,tidied and cleaned kitchen,sorted cat litter,bins,recycling,glass and compost,put them out for bin men collection.
Then I had a shower.I feel a little better my mood isn't as low as it was.
I am looking forward to going out tomorrow.

WastingAsparagus · Jan 06, 2020 at 06:26 PM

I am doing well after meeting with my psychiatrist, who I've seen for about six years. I feel excited about the future.

Have Hope · Jan 06, 2020 at 07:48 PM

Utterly and entirely disgusted.

Breaking Dawn · Jan 06, 2020 at 09:06 PM

My heart aches. If you only knew. I wish so much for you. I feel beautiful gratitude for being here. God bless all of you.

bpcyclist · Jan 07, 2020 at 03:10 AM

Just an extraordinarily difficult last 48 hours in terms of bp 1 issues. Now, The Committee (voices, commands, insane racing thoughts) is mercifully quiet for a bit. I hope it lasts. I really need a break from this.

Uncharted · Jan 07, 2020 at 08:30 AM

I feel like crap. I just had a fight with my mom abt the same stuff again. She loves to pretend shes so f***ing perfect and of course im always the problem. She cant even address the things im telling her and then she says "i cant do anymore". Like you ever did. Cant wait for her to be in her deathbed and have no one around. I have a dentist appt soon and i was so excited i finally had that planned after 2 yrs of putting it off and of course she had to ruin it. Ive been feeling so much better the past couple months and im taking steps to care for myself. No one even cares.

guilloche · Jan 07, 2020 at 09:41 AM

Struggling. Cried on the way to the office last night. I feel like I keep trying to solve the same problems, running in the same circles, and getting no where. It's the type of thing that a therapist or coach should be perfect for, but I can't seem to find any that actually understand or help in any way.

My brain feels like it's rotting with boredom. I'm getting more administrative stuff at work. I need to find a new job, but am just... overwhelmed by all of it. Ugh.

And, tired... didn't sleep well, restless last night.

I don't know. I don't understand why everything feels so hard. Part of me thinks that I need to take a leave of absence, because my job is just... crushing the life out of me. But, I'm scared that I won't get anything accomplished with the time off. I had three weeks (!) off at Christmas, and even though I tried, I didn't get anything done!

Taylor27 · Jan 07, 2020 at 10:27 AM

Depressed this morning

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How are you feeling right now #6?

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Have Hope Wise Elder Member Since Dec 2017 Location: Eastern, USA Posts: 9,083 (SuperPoster!) 6 3,626 hugs given	Jan 05, 2020 at 03:47 PM #22 Terrible and worse off than when I woke up. I should have just stayed in bed. I feel really depressed and hopeless. __________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes

Mountaindewed Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2016 Location: Where the sidewalk ends Posts: 36,129 (SuperPoster!) 7 8,747 hugs given	Jan 05, 2020 at 04:04 PM #23 I feel sick but also anxious at the same time. So it’s hard to tell what’s real and what’s not. I just took a Xanax so I’ll see how it goes. __________________ Ridin' with Biden

Mountaindewed Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jun 2016 Location: Where the sidewalk ends Posts: 36,129 (SuperPoster!) 7 8,747 hugs given	Jan 05, 2020 at 08:47 PM #24 It’s Sunday night but I don’t work tomorrow for the first time in awhile. But my body still is reacting as though it’s a work night by having trouble falling asleep. January is such a ****ed up month for me in general. __________________ Ridin' with Biden

Sunflower123 Legendary Wise Elder Member Since Jan 2015 Location: USA Posts: 26,543 (SuperPoster!) 9 95k hugs given	Jan 05, 2020 at 10:35 PM #25 Emotional.

Anonymous48672 Guest Posts: n/a	Jan 06, 2020 at 12:09 AM #26 Embarrassed that my posting style offends people.

WastingAsparagus Student of Life Member Since Mar 2014 Location: South America Posts: 4,658 10 2,911 hugs given	Jan 06, 2020 at 12:13 AM #27 I don't even know: if I had to say just average.

giddykitty Grand Poohbah Member Since Jan 2018 Location: United States Posts: 1,639 6 3,229 hugs given	Jan 06, 2020 at 12:15 AM #28 i swear i posted in this today! maybe it was another similar thread?? anyway, nothing's changed since then. I'm tired from being sick. bleh! edit: oh gah! there's a series of this in the Coffeehouse too??!! Oddly enough, I didn't find my post about being sick...lol

Taylor27 healing from trauma Member Since Dec 2017 Location: Alberta Posts: 30,425 (SuperPoster!) 6 24.3k hugs given	Jan 06, 2020 at 08:44 AM #29 Anxious this morning

giddykitty Grand Poohbah Member Since Jan 2018 Location: United States Posts: 1,639 6 3,229 hugs given	Jan 06, 2020 at 09:42 AM #30 Found my post about being sick somewhere else random. Anyway, Feeling hungry. Is that an emotion? Well, it's a feeling! Anyway, gonna go eat

Taylor27 healing from trauma Member Since Dec 2017 Location: Alberta Posts: 30,425 (SuperPoster!) 6 24.3k hugs given	Jan 06, 2020 at 03:33 PM #32 Depressed this afternoon

Marylin Grand Magnate Member Since Feb 2015 Location: England,UK Posts: 3,017 9 863 hugs given	Jan 06, 2020 at 06:02 PM #33 I got chores done,tidied and cleaned kitchen,sorted cat litter,bins,recycling,glass and compost,put them out for bin men collection. Then I had a shower.I feel a little better my mood isn't as low as it was. I am looking forward to going out tomorrow.

WastingAsparagus Student of Life Member Since Mar 2014 Location: South America Posts: 4,658 10 2,911 hugs given	Jan 06, 2020 at 06:26 PM #34 I am doing well after meeting with my psychiatrist, who I've seen for about six years. I feel excited about the future.

Have Hope Wise Elder Member Since Dec 2017 Location: Eastern, USA Posts: 9,083 (SuperPoster!) 6 3,626 hugs given	Jan 06, 2020 at 07:48 PM #35 Utterly and entirely disgusted. __________________ "Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes

Breaking Dawn Legendary Member Since Sep 2019 Location: USA Posts: 16,689 (SuperPoster!) 4 42.2k hugs given	Jan 06, 2020 at 09:06 PM #36 My heart aches. If you only knew. I wish so much for you. I feel beautiful gratitude for being here. God bless all of you.

bpcyclist Legendary Member Since Sep 2019 Location: Portland Posts: 12,681 (SuperPoster!) 4 40.2k hugs given	Jan 07, 2020 at 03:10 AM #37 Just an extraordinarily difficult last 48 hours in terms of bp 1 issues. Now, The Committee (voices, commands, insane racing thoughts) is mercifully quiet for a bit. I hope it lasts. I really need a break from this. __________________ When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield

Taylor27 healing from trauma Member Since Dec 2017 Location: Alberta Posts: 30,425 (SuperPoster!) 6 24.3k hugs given	Jan 07, 2020 at 10:27 AM #40 Depressed this morning