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deus ex machina
Member Since Jul 2014
Location: Ticket-taking at the cartesian theater.
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#21
My late husband.. so many things. The way he never took a shot at me when I was down, but was always there to help however he could. How willingly he shared his knowledge with me, patiently teaching me all he knew and being only proud if I happened to surpass him in anything. The way he took me at my word, respected me unfailingly. The way he cried tears of joy on our wedding day. The tenderness with which he always approached me. The way he remained my greatest friend long after we became partners. The way he's forever raised the bar for my expectations, even though it's made it pretty impossible for me to be able to move on. What a jerk!
__________________ “We use our minds not to discover facts but to hide them. One of things the screen hides most effectively is the body, our own body, by which I mean, the ins and outs of it, its interiors. Like a veil thrown over the skin to secure its modesty, the screen partially removes from the mind the inner states of the body, those that constitute the flow of life as it wanders in the journey of each day.” — Antonio R. Damasio, “The Feeling of What Happens: Body and Emotion in the Making of Consciousness” (p.28) |
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Gdorfus, jaynedough, spondiferous
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#22
When my brothers and I were young, my parents would take us on drives and tell us we were lost. Pretty sure we weren't. They just liked to take us out. I'm pretty sure that some of these trips were around Christmastime, since they also always took us out to look at Christmas lights.
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Gdorfus
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Grand Member
Member Since Sep 2014
Location: somewhere between hell and back over the rainbow
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#23
the North Carolina vacation that I went with my dad before he died . never forget that memory .my mom making the holiday food and having the holidays at the house.
Diagnosis: Anxiety and depression meds : Cymbalta 90mgs at night Vistrail 2 25 mgs daily for anxiety prn 50 mgs at night for insomnia __________________ |
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Gdorfus, jaynedough
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Legendary
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#24
My parents gave me a world where I made sense.
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vonmoxie
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Dancer in the Dark
Member Since Feb 2012
Location: somewhere, i think.
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#25
I really got to know my baby sister when she was 12 and I was 18. She was in crisis because she was being bullied at school by all her supposed 'friends'; I was in mental health crisis (which I didn't know at the time) and drug and alcohol withdrawal (which I also did not understand). I had agoraphobia and spent a lot of time in my room with the light shaded so it was very dim. She used to come in every night and play cards with me and we'd talk. She'd tell me about all the things they were doing to her at school and I would build her up and tell her not to believe it because it wasn't true, and they were only mean to her because they had low-self esteem and that she was better than them. We developed a Friday night routine of going to the general store and buying little bags of penny candies, and then going back home, lighting candles in my room, laying across the bed and watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer on my old black and white TV.
For years afterward, once I moved out of the house, apparently she kept my room exactly as it was because going in there and having memories of me was the only time she felt safe. __________________ |
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jaynedough, vonmoxie
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Member Since Mar 2015
Location: US
Posts: 669
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#26
My maternal grandfather, whom we referred to as "Pop", died of lung cancer in 2009. He was as opinionated and as independent as they come. He did not care one bit of the opinions of others, a fact which was great cause for distress when my mother was growing up. She would often tell me of an instance in which he'd come to one of her school-productions, barefoot and wearing an old stained t-shirt and shorts. Coupled with his long hair and beard, he must've been a sight. "Who let that wino in?" A student whispered to my mother. "I don't know..." Responded she, hoping, according to her, very much that no one would discover that "wino" was related to her in any way.
He was a genius carpenter as well, earning the nickname "Jesus" from my mother's schoolmates due to his long, unkempt hair and, as I've mentioned earlier, proclivity for walking about shoeless. My father worked under him for sometime and has told of my Pop's admirable skills. He would scan the blueprints for a moment, then toss it aside and work out how he wished to do it himself. A building doesn't seem the sort of thing a person should improvise upon, which I suppose makes the fact that they never crumbled or anything like that much more admirable. It wasn't until after his death that my parents began sharing stories about him. I've apparently a great deal in common with him, or so my mother says. I didn't very much like when he would visit as a young girl because he was quite loud and that frightened me very much. Even as I got older, and was no longer frightened by loud noises, speaking to people whether they were family or not simply wasn't an easy thing to do. Left with only stories, I can confidently say Pop was quite a character. |
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jaynedough
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#27
I remember going on picnics with my grandparents. Tuna salad sandwiches and iced tea in quart jars. We would sit in the shade and enjoy our meal. A nice memory.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha
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jaynedough
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Disreputable Old Troll
Member Since Oct 2015
Location: The Star of the North
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#28
I posted this in reply to another Thread just a few minutes ago. It seems appropriate that it be posted here as well. I grew up in a very elderly extended family. I was an only child. The next youngest person to me was my mother. And my mother was middle aged by the time I came along. I spent my whole childhood going to one funeral after another as all of my elderly relatives died off, one-by-one.
Back then, there was no discussion of such a thing as a grieving process. Death was just something that happened. We went to the wakes & to the funerals. Sometimes there was a reception afterwards. Then we went home & went back to doing whatever it was we did. They're all long gone now... including my parents. I don't really think about any of them very much. But, every so often, they make their way back into my thoughts... some good... some not so... It was all a long time ago... __________________ "I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last) |
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jaynedough
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Jun 2015
Location: Ohio
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#29
My brother died back in 1990 and had many struggles. Though he had a really hard time with his mental illness and other things, he and I could always find something totally silly and trite to LOL about.
One time I will never forget is when I had typed up something and the paper was still in the typewriter and all the words were off a letter or two. It looked like I had typed in a foreign language. He said he never knew that I could type in Russian. |
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jaynedough, spondiferous
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Member Since Sep 2012
Location: In the bush, Canada
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#30
My mom passed away just before Christmas this year. Making shortbread was the hardest thing to do and the best thing I could do. Making traditional shortbread requires about an hour of kneading the dough to get it just right and melty-in-your-mouthy. We would put on Christmas records (yes, vinyl) and blast them (the record player was in the basement so you had to play it loud to hear it upstairs) and we would sit in the kitchen listening/singing and chatting. We would chat about everything.
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jaynedough
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#31
Quote:
About the day you wrote this, I was talking to my brother and he told me that he'd just made tuna sandwiches for he and his wife and how it reminded him of how, for years, our mom made tuna sandwiches every single day. (And now I'm craving a tuna sandwich. ) |
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cakeladie
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Magnate
Member Since Mar 2015
Location: California
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#32
Every Christmas Eve me and my dad would cook dinner together and we would watch the Christmas lights. He left us on 5/4/14 and I did not want to cook christmas dinner this year and we did not put up a tree. I found a cube that when you turn in changes light and on Christmas Eve I tried so hard to put it on his grave but it's up high and they locked the ladders. I tried for 3 hours in the cold and rain before I gave up
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Anonymous32091, jaynedough
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Legendary Wise Elder
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#33
I remember playing word games with my mother while we waited for the truck to be loaded or unloaded. My parents drove a semi when I was young so a lot of time was spent on the road. My mother was always trying to find ways to entertain me. She did a wonderful job. We played games, colored and read books. We had a great time. Good memories.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk __________________ Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha
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cakeladie
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jaynedough
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Member
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#34
Quote:
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Legendary
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#35
Gaylegg and Tsuki.... Y'all reminded me of how my mom used to entertain us while waiting for the doctor's office to open. We'd be in the parking lot and have us try to guess how many cars would go by before the doctor came. Definitely low-tech, but it kept three kids occupied.
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Legendary
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#36
There were times my dad and I would go out in the woods with the chainsaw. He cut the trees down and I cut them up. He helped me find a strength in myself. We bonded alot during those times.
(I posted this on another thread, but thought it should go here, too.) |
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#37
My favourite memories of you two, were the daily visits to my wall - you would eyeball me through the window and baaaaaah really demandingly for food. I love how you smiled when i gave in. Im so sorry humans think its ok to eat you
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jaynedough
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New Member
Member Since Jan 2016
Location: Dallas
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#38
My dad was a wonderful person. He was a bit strict but was very generous and always showed he loved us so much.
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jaynedough
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#39
My mom made spectacular Thanksgiving feasts. I'm missing the cranbrosia and sticky mashed potatoes.
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Legendary
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#40
Every winter, my mom started seeds for the vegetable garden. When spring came, my dad would till the garden and they'd get the plants in the ground. They always grew tomatoes, cucumbers, squash and eggplant, as well as other veggies. My mom made the best BLTs! 'Maters fresh from the garden, still warm from the sun!
They also had a lot of decorative plants, including my mom's peonies. They were ones she gave her mom. |
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